神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S05E01

Part 3 Oct. 1, 2020, 12:19 p.m.

I mean, you killed and ate a bunch of people.
你毕竟杀过还吃过一堆人
They were children, Jake.
我只吃过小孩子 Jake
Weak little children. One conk on the head was all it took.
没什么力气的小孩子只需要往脑袋上一敲就行了
Damn it.
妈的
I can't believe I'm friends with a cowardly cannibal.
我的朋友居然是个胆小鬼食人癖
Here she comes. Big smiles.
她来了使劲儿笑
Hey, Rosa. Hey. How's my bike?
嗨 Rosa 嗨我的机车怎么样了
Great. It actually was a lot of fun to ride--
非常好实际上骑起来还很有趣
once I got the hang of it.
只要掌握了诀窍
And you were able to finish everything on my list?
你们完成我单子上的所有事情了吗
It wasn't too much, was it?
会不会太多了
No. Not at all.
没有的事完全不多
If anything, you didn't ask enough of us.
真要有什么问题那也是你要我们做的事还不够多
Great, 'cause I thought of a few more things.
太好了因为我又想到了一些要你们做的事
Oh, were you able to send that email to Adrian?
噢你们写邮件给Adrian了吗
Oh, yes, he wrote back right away.
噢写了他立马就回邮件了
It wasn't as graphic as I feared.
并没有我担心的那么生动具体
He wrote the number eight...
他写的是数字八
equal sign, equal sign, equal sign, equal sign,
等号♥ 等号♥ 等号♥ 等号♥
equal sign, equal sign, equal sign, capital D...
等号♥ 等号♥ 等号♥ 大写的D
oh. I see what this is.
噢我懂了
This is a Yup.
这是个没错
Cream turkey.
奶油火鸡
You know, what I could really go for is--
你知道吗我真正想吃的是
People potpie? First of all, Jake,
人肉馅饼吗首先 Jake
great alliteration. Second of all,
头韵压得好第二点
just because I was arrested for cannibalism
仅仅因为我是吃人被抓起来的
doesn't mean that all I like to eat is people.
并不代表我只喜欢吃人肉
I was gonna say "A chicken burrito."
我刚才想说的是墨西哥鸡肉卷
Man, my cousin was so tasty. Oh, come on.
但是天呐我小表亲真是美味够了
Oop hello.
惨了哈喽
You're gonna die in here, cop.
你会死在这里的警♥察♥
What's up, kid? 'Sup, Chico?
你好你好 Chico
It's so crazy. They hate you so much,
真疯狂他们这么恨你
they don't even care about me. Yeah, congratulations.
以至于都不在乎我♥干♥过啥了对啊恭喜你了
I think I'm gonna need to join a gang.
我想我需要加入一个帮派
And that way I'll have protection
这样的话有人罩着我
and no one will mess with me. I don't know, man.
就没人会来找我麻烦了我可不确定
Joining a gang is not that easy. It would be for me.
加入帮派可不是件容易的事对我来说肯定很容易
I once took a seminar on how to ace job interviews
我以前参加过一个讲怎么搞定面试的研讨会
and I'm really good at them.
而且我做得超好
Really? This I've gotta see.
真的吗这我就得好好看看了
Hey, everyone, I'm Jake.
嘿大家好我是Jake
Thank you so much for sitting down with me.
非常感谢你们能花时间来听我讲
I just need a moment of your time,
我只会耽误你们一点点时间
and then you can get back to watching your stories.
然后你们就可以继续看你们的节目了
What can I tell you about myself?
我是一个什么样的人呢
Well, I'm hardworking, incredibly motivated.
没错我工作努力积极向上
I can make a shiv out of anything.
我可以用任何材料做出来一把刀
I am deceptively athletic. I'm not sure if your gang likes
运动方面我特能唬人我不知道你们帮派喜不喜欢
to play B-ball out in the yard, but I can dunk.
在院子里打篮球但是我会扣篮哦
Oakley...
妈呀
And I'm just super excited to join--
我非常激动加入你们帮派
what are you guys called again? - ISIS.
你们叫啥来着 ISIS
ISIS...
ISIS
cool.
酷
Well, I am excited to join...
好吧我很激动加入
ISIS.
ISIS
I can't believe I went 0 for 16.
我不敢相信16个帮派都拒绝了我
I got rejected by my safety gang.
连我保底觉得稳拿的帮派都把我拒绝了
I'm gonna die in here.
我会死在这里了
Well, there is one more option, but it's a long shot.
对了这儿还有一个选项虽然机会渺茫
Remember that guy Romero
记得那个Romero吗
who you got the cell phone from?
你从他那里搞到了手♥机♥
If you got in good with his crew, nobody would dare touch you.
如果你和他的团伙处得好没人敢动你
But he is real scary and crazy.
但他确实又恐怖又疯狂
Okay, and how anti-Semitic is he?
好吧他有多反犹呢
Average? Then let's give it a shot!
一般反犹吧那好去试试吧
So, Picante Beef, I hear you wanna be part of my crew.
香辣牛肉面我听说你想加入我们帮派
Not ideally the nickname I would've chosen for myself
虽然香辣牛肉面不像是我会给我自己取的昵称
but yes, I think I could be of help to you.
但是我认为我可以给你帮上忙
Do you know how long I've been in this prison?
你知道我在监狱混了多久了吗
17 years!
17年啦
Well, you look great. And not once,
你看起来还是很棒呀但是从来没有一次
in all of that time, Beefy... - It's just "Beefy" Now?
在这17年里小牛 - 现在又变成"小牛"了呀
Have I ever seen anything as disrespectful
我见过的所有事情里面真是没有
as a cop coming into my prison
比一个条子跑到监狱里来
telling me how to eat my soups!
教我怎么喝我的汤更放肆了的
But damn!
但是妈的
Crumbling the noodle on top gives it an extra
把面条弄成碎屑洒在汤上确实别有风味
little crispity-snap!
嚼起来嘎嘣脆
I was blown away. Wasn't I, Tank?
我完全震惊了对吧 Tank
Hasn't stopped talking about it.
一直可劲儿说呢
Come here, Beef Baby!
到这儿来牛肉小宝
Great. So, does this mean
太好了那是不是说
that I'm part of the crew? Nobody can touch you now.
我现在就已经入伙了现在没有人敢碰你了
Wow, guess all it took was the ramen tip.
哇哦原来只需要泡面小窍门就行了
Actually, you gotta do one more thing for me
其实你还要再替我做一件事
to close the deal. Absolutely no problem.
我们才算谈妥绝对没问题
Actually, I have a great idea for a ramen dessert.N
其实我对拿泡面做甜点还有一个绝妙的想法
You make it with JellO mix. I need you to kill a guard.
加一些JellO牌烘焙粉我要你去杀一个看守
Oh...okay. Great.
哦好的很好
Cool-cool-cool-cool, cool-cool-cool.
酷酷酷酷酷毙了
Beef Baby's out for blood.
喋血牛肉小宝
So...
所以说
OK. This guy you're gonna kill, Wilson.
好的你要杀的是这个人 Wilson
Oh, I'd rather not know his name.
噢我宁愿不知道他的名字
It's Alan Wilson. He's got a three-year-old, Dexter.
他叫Alan Wilson 他有个三岁的儿子Dexter
They call him Dex.
他们叫他Dex
Cool. I'm not worried at all about little Dex.
哇哦我一点都不替小Dex担心
I'm sure he'll be fine.
我肯定他以后不会有啥的
I mean, I grew up without a dad. Yeah?
我的意思是我从小就没有爸爸是吗
Me too. So did I.
我也是我也是
See? And we're all doing great.
看到没我们都过得挺好
Can I ask what this Wilson did
我能问问Wilson到底做了什么
to deserve this? He beat the crap out of me.
落得这个下场吗他把我痛打了一顿
How? More importantly,
怎么做到的更重要的是
he keeps interfering with my business interests.
他一直妨碍我的商业利益
But it's about my thing too, right?
但这也和我的事有关对吧
Of course.
当然
How are you gonna do it? Shiv him, shank him, stab him?
你打算怎么做砍死他刺死他捅死他
Are those different?
这有什么区别吗
Oh, boy. Should I be asking
天呐我该找
someone else to do this? No, no, no, no. It's fine.
其他人来做这件事吗不不不不没事的
I'm gonna prove myself to you.
我要向你证明我自己
But what if instead of killing Wilson,
但是如果我们不杀了他
we get him fired? That way,
而是让他被解雇呢那样的话
you don't have another man's death on your conscience.
就不会再多一条人命让你良心不安了
Yeah, that doesn't bother me.
是的但这不会使我不安
No, of course not. Why would it?
不当然不会为什么会呢
But if we murder him, there's gonna be an investigation,
但如果我们杀了他那么就会有调查
and that could bring a lot of heat
你就有可能给自己惹来
down on you, you know? I can see that.
很多关注我知道
But that's not how we usually do things around here.
但我们平常在这里不是如此行事的
Sure, but you know what else
当然不过你知道还有什么
you didn't used to do around here...
是你们平时并不如此行事的吗
Sprinkle uncooked noodles on top of your ramen.
在泡面里撒上没煮过的面条
You're right. You're right.
你是对的你是对的
You've earned the benefit of the doubt.
我信你这一回
You have 24 hours, Beef Baby.
你有24小时牛肉小宝