太好了
Great.
要点什么
What can I do you?
去他的 我要相信自己
Screw it. I'm gonna believe in myself.
有你的
Attaboy.
给我点有劲的东西
Give me something dark and strong.
你认识那个失踪的家伙 JP吗
Hey, did you know that guy that went missing... J.P.?
谁想知道
Who's asking?
就是个老朋友
Just an old pal.
发生这种事我很遗憾
Look, I'm sorry to hear about what happened.
但 那人就是个渣滓
But... guy's a lowlife.
那晚上 我把他赶了出去 因为他偷我小费
That night, I had to kick his ass out of here for stealing my tips.
不管JP是遭遇了什么
Whatever J.P. got...
他八成是罪有应得
probably had it coming.
JP也没那么糟
J.P. wasn't that bad.
你认识他
You knew him?
我们关系没那么好 但的确认识
This isn't exactly "cheers," but yeah.
别误会
And don't get me wrong,
我可不敢跟他买♥♥二手车
I would not buy a used car from the guy.
但他不会伤害别人
But he was harmless.
那他的问题在哪
So, what was his problem?
多了去了
What wasn't?
这么大白天在这儿买♥♥醉
You're in here getting stunned while the sun's still up,
生活肯定一团糟
your life's a regular Charlie foxtrot.
相信我
Trust me.
我是迪恩
I'm Dean.
蒂娜
Tina.
慢用
There you go.
你怎么知道斯克兰顿的皇家旅馆
How do you know the royale motel in Scranton?
我爸 我和我弟 我们被大雪困在那儿一周
My dad, me, and my bro... we got snowed in there for a week.
我在那里待了三个多月
Well, I was there for about three months
因为我爸把我们的钱都喝光了
after my father drank all our money away.
吃白米和嘀嗒糖过活 直到被赶走
Lived on white rice and tic tacs until they kicked us out.
好时光啊
Good times.
我爸一直在工作
My dad was always working,
于是我研究出大概101种
So I came up with about 101 different ways
做奶酪通心粉的方式
to make macaroni and cheese.
真的假的
Serious?
真的 加番茄酱当调味料
Oh, yeah. Now, add ketchup for spice, hmm?
金枪鱼 热狗
Uh, tuna, hot dogs,
还有混搭棉花糖
fluff marshmallow mix.
听上去好恶心
Ugh! That sounds disgusting.
我弟弟还觉得挺新奇
Yeah, well, my brother thought it was exotic.
敬糟糕的童年
Well, here's to, uh, crappy childhoods.
好啊
Hey. All right.
抱歉
Sorry.
我该走了
I should go.
萨姆呼叫
免得你无可救药地爱上我
Before you fall hopelessly in love with me.
你不会有事吧
You gonna be okay?
向来都好
I always am.
-怎么样 -不太好
- How we looking? - Not great.
JP再过三天就会被驱逐了
Turns out J.P. was about three days from getting evicted.
房♥东说他成天放尼尔·戴蒙德的歌♥曲
His landlord said the guy blasted Neil Diamond 24/7
还说他的厕所是
and that his bathroom was,
"魔鬼的屁♥眼♥"
"Like staring into the devil's butt."
好生动
That's vivid.
而且准确 我看到了
And accurate. I saw it.
你看到了厕所还是...
You saw the John, or, uh...
少来
Don't.
你有发现吗
So, you got anything?
我...
Yeah. I got, uh,
什么都没发现 怎么办
Jack with two scoops of squat. I don't know, man.
我们今晚就到此为止吧
I think we ought to just call it a night and, uh...
然后呢
And what?
迪恩 喂
Dean? Hello?
萨姆 我好像有发现
Sammy, I think I got something.
蒂娜
Tina?
搞什么
What the hell?
该死
Son of a bitch.
不是吧
Seriously?
不是吧
Seriously?
你叫什么
What's your name?
迪恩
Dean.
迪恩 是我啊 蒂娜
Dean? It's me... Tina.
什么
What?
求你告诉我你知道这是怎么回事
Please tell me you know what the hell is going on.
老实说 我还不确定
Honestly, I'm not sure yet.
我出了酒吧 然后...
Because I left the bar and then there was this...
有一道白光吗
A light? A bright light?
对 然后我就到这里了
Yes, and then I was here,
我还以为这是做恶梦 但是...
and I thought this was a nightmare, but...
天呐 如果你也在
Oh, god, if you're here...
这不可能是真的 这...
It can't be real. This doesn't...
我知道 尽量保持冷静
I know. Just try to stay calm, okay?
冷静 我变成小孩了
Stay calm? I'm a freakin' tween,
你看上去像想进单向乐队没成功的小屁孩
and you look like some One Direction reject.
而且我们在吓人的连环杀手地下室里
And we're in some freaky serial-killer basement.
-我不能... -蒂娜
- I can't... - Tina, Tina, just...
我不会让你有事的 好吗
I'm not gonna let anything happen to you, okay?
我不会再让你有别的事了
Well, anything else happen to you.
这太疯狂了
This is crazy.
你怎么这么冷静
How are you so calm?
熟能生巧
Practice.
那位是谁
Who's your friend?
我不知道
I'm not sure.
他不说话
He doesn't talk.
JP
J.P.?
不要
No!
不要
No.
别
Don't!
这可是美国 你不能这么做
This is freakin' America, man! You can't do this!
不要
No!
呼叫迪恩
是什么
What is it?
伙计
Hey, buddy?
那外套哪来的
Where did that Jacket come from?
我的成人礼礼物
My bar mitzvah.
那晚上很神奇
It was a magical night.
当然了
Yeah, I bet.
再说一遍
Why don't you try it again?
垃圾箱
Dumpster.
在垃圾箱旁找到的
Found it by the dumpster.
好
All right.
他们大概下了毒
They probably poisoned it.
是啊
Right.
当然了
Obviously.
你觉得他们把JP怎么了
What do you think they're doing to J.P.?
没好事
Nothing good.
你在干什么
What are you doing?
把我们弄出去
Getting us out of here.
之前
You know, before...
我以为你就是个普通的酒鬼
I thought you were just another drunk.
我更喜欢人说行为正常酗酒者
I prefer functional alcoholic.
说真的
Seriously, who...
你是什么啊
What are you?
这...说来话长了
That... is a long-ass story.
花
Flowers.
好嘞
Yahtzee.
快走
Get out.
什么
What?
快走 我会拖住他
Hurry. I'll keep him busy.
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