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希拉要我让哈维想办法把你弄抓狂
Sheila asked me to ask Harvey to get you to freak out about something.
什么 她为什么这么做
What? Why would she do that?
因为如果你被哈维弄抓狂的话
Because if you're freaking out on Harvey,
你就会淡定面对希拉的妹妹被困在长岛快车上
you're not freaking out about the fact that Sheila's sister
然后我来替补她的事实
is stuck on the L.I.E., and I'm gonna fill in.
等会 所以这一切都是为了让我分心而已吗
Wait, so this was just to get me distracted?
这是就伴郎该做的事 路易
That's what a best man does, Louis.
今天我全心全意为你服务
Today, I'm here for you. Whatever you need.
我都快哭了
I think I might cry.
你最好再忍♥五分钟
Well, you better hold it together another five minutes
因为我俩得走上红毯了
because it's time we walk down that aisle.
千万别以为咱俩很快也能办婚礼
Don't get any ideas about us doing this any time soon.
别在这时候开玩笑 哈维
Now's not the time, Harvey.
还有比这更适合的时机吗
What better time is there?
这是无比般配的两人
Sometimes you meet two people who were so perfectly made
天生一对 地造一双
for each other, it is hard to envision one without the other.
他们彼此成就
Each one compliments the other,
他们对于彼此之重要
such that they are as important to each another
就如空气和水之于生命
as air and water are to life.
认识路易这么多年
I have known Louis many years.
我们同甘共苦
We have been through thick, thin,
相互扶持
and everything in between.
我很自豪能成为他的朋友
I am proud to call him my friend.
我见到希拉的那一刻
And when I met Sheila,
我就知道她是路易命中注定的人
I knew she was the perfect fit for him.
就像灰姑娘的水晶鞋
Like Cinderella's glass slipper.
见鬼 斯坦 我告诉你别说这个
Damn it, Stan, I told you not to talk about that.
我们的性生活可不能乱
Our sex life isn't up for--
路易 我说的是童话 没人知道...
Louis, it is a fairy tale. No one knows about--
抱歉 你继续
Sorry. Carry on.
我刚才说到
As I was saying...
正是因为如此 我可以说
In this particular case, I would say there are
世界上没有任何人比他们更般配
no two people on this earth more made for each other than--
天啊
Oh, God.
希拉 在他问你愿不愿意之前
Sheila, you're not supposed to say that
你不应该说天啊
until he's going to ask you to say I do.
-路易 我的羊水破了 -我的妈呀
- Louis, my water just broke. -Holy shit.
路易 冷静 现在不是
Louis, stay calm. Now's not the time to--
我从没这么冷静过 唐娜
I've never been more calm in my life, Donna.
斯坦 问我们愿不愿意
Stan, ask us if we do.
路易 你愿意娶希拉为妻吗
Louis, do you take Sheila to be your wife?
我愿意 你呢
I do. Sheila.
我愿意
I do.
斯坦
Stan.
我宣布你们结为夫妻
I now pronounce you man and wife.
哈维 唐娜 把戒指给我们
Harvey, Donna, give me the rings.
希拉 我扶你去救护车那
Sheila, let's get you to that ambulance.
你提前准备了救护车吗
You have an ambulance waiting?
当然了 她已经怀胎九月
Of course I do. She's nine months pregnant.
我不想冒任何风险
I didn't want to leave anything to chance.
路易 亲爱的 真抱歉我毁了我们的婚礼
Louis, honey, I'm so sorry I just ruined our wedding.
毁了
Ruined it?
希拉 我们刚结为夫妇 马上要迎来新的生命
Sheila, we just got married and our baby is on the way.
这是我生命中最美好的一天了
This is the best day of my life.
-你真的那么觉得吗 -当然了
- You really mean that? - Of course I do!
我们的结婚纪念日和孩子的生日
Our anniversary and our child's birthday
将是在同一天
are gonna be on the same day.
而且你看...
And look...
我们的战车已等候多时
our chariot awaits.
太谢谢你了 路易
Thank you so much, Louis.
要是没有你 我都不知道该怎么办
I don't know what I'd do without you.
我爱你 希拉
I love you, Sheila.
走吧 我们去迎接这个孩子吧
Come on, let's go have the baby.
天啊 这太难为情了
Oh, my God. That was so embarrassing.
我刚刚在婚礼现场羊水破了
My water just broke in our ceremony.
希拉 我们已经讨论过这个了
Sheila, we have been over this.
这件事很美妙 为什么又改想法了
It's wonderful. What changed?
改想法了是因为我在生孩子
What changed is I'm in labor,
而你却坐在那 什么事都不做
and you're just sitting there doing nothing.
我们在救护车里 我能做什么
Well, we're in an ambulance. What the fuck can I do?
你可以自插双目
You can stab a fork in your eye
这样你就能和我感同身受了
and show me we're in this together!
我应该叫上斯坦和我们一起的
I should have asked Stan to come on the ambulance with us.
你是在说我现在疯了吗
Are you seriously telling me that I'm crazy right now?
那是对讲机的声音吗
Is that the intercom?
我觉得他们前面需要人
I think they need me in the front.
我的天啊 这是个天大的错误
Oh, my God. This was a huge mistake.
我觉得这可能是三胞胎
I think I might be having triplets.
希拉 看着我
Sheila, hey, hey, hey! Look at me!
我就在这
I'm right here.
我发誓 最多三十分钟我们就能到产房♥
I swear, 30 minutes tops we'll be in that delivery room.
-深呼吸 深呼吸 -好
- Breathe, breathe, breathe. - Okay.
刚那下太疼了
That was a bad one.
-有什么消息吗 -"消息"是什么意思
- Any word? - What do you mean "word"?
你想让我在路易老婆生孩子时 给他打电♥话♥吗
You want me to call Louis while his wife is in labor?
我情愿给其他任何人打电♥话♥聊其他任何事
I rather call anybody else about anything else.
-哈维 -不 唐娜 他没说错
- Harvey. - No, Donna, he's right.
是我问的问题太傻了
It's a stupid question.
那不是个傻问题
It's not a stupid question.
我们只不过是有些无所事事
We all just don't know what to do.
我去过的唯一一次这样匆匆结束的婚礼
I mean, the only time I've been to a wedding that got cut short,
是你进监狱之前那场
you went to prison.
没话怼回来吗
Nothing?
不是吧 可以怼的挺多的啊
Come on, that is some A+ material right there.
-这酒是假的吗 -不是因为那个
- Is this thing on? - Oh, it's not that.
只是...你看看 都没人在跳舞
It's just--look at this. Nobody's dancing.
当然没人跳了
Of course they're not dancing.
那太奇怪了
It's weird.
他们也没什么要庆祝的
It's like they have nothing to celebrate.
不如我们给他们一个庆祝的缘由吧
What do you say we give them something to celebrate?
等等
Wait.
你什么意思
What are you saying?
我的意思是我爱你
I'm saying I love you.
而无论我是什么时候才意识到的
And whether I knew it or not,
从我遇到你的那一秒 我就想娶你了
I wanted to marry you from the second I met you.
我的天啊
Oh, my God!
唐娜·罗伯塔·鲍尔森
Donna Roberta Paulsen,
此时此地 你愿意嫁给我吗
will you marry me right here, right now?
哈维 我当然愿意了
Harvey, of course I'll marry you,
但现在我们的家人都不在现场
but right now our families aren't here
-而且我也没穿婚纱 -慢着
- and I don't have a dress and-- - Wait, stop.
你看起来美极了
You look beautiful.
我们可以在家人面前再举办一次婚礼
We can do it again for our families.
但是...
But--
如果说从我妈妈那件事里 我吸取到的唯一教训
If there's one thing I learned from my mom,
那就是我浪费了太多时间
it's that I wasted too much time.
首先 没有原谅她
First, not forgiving her.
然后不承认自己对你的心意
And then not admitting how I feel about you.
而我现在一秒也不想浪费了
Well, I don't want to waste another second.
请问你今晚愿意嫁给我吗
Please, will you marry me tonight?
那戒指怎么办 我们都没有买♥♥戒指
What about rings? We don't have any rings.
你可以之后再补个给我 但我已经给你准备好了
You can find one for me, but I have one for you.
这就是信封里装的东西
That's what was in the envelope.
你觉得怎么样
What do you say?
我愿意 哈维
I say yes, Harvey.
我愿意
Yes.
各位 我有些话要说
Everyone, I have an announcement to make.
我们一写好各自的誓词
As soon as we can write our vows,
我和唐娜就要结婚了
Donna and I are getting married.
我很想给你们主婚 但我没这个执照
I'd offer to officiate but I'm not licensed,
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