公园与游憩（2009）

Parks and Recreation S04E06

Part 3 Jan. 27, 2024, 11:47 a.m.

我很确定这不算事
I'm sure this is nothing.
好吧嗯那肯定是有事了
Okay, well, that was definitely something.
我的天 - 我知道这一招
Oh. My God. - I know that move.
他们五分钟之后就要做♥爱♥了
They're gonna have sex in five minutes.
我得阻止他们
I've gotta stop this.
我得让他们彼此余生都保持距离
I've gotta keep them away from each other for the rest of their lives.
你要怎么做到 - 我不清楚
How are you gonna do that? - Unclear!
哦棒十块钱
Oh, yeah, ten bucks!
这算上中彩票了
That counts as winning the lottery.
好现在这是世上最好吃的烤芝士三明治吗
Okay, now is this the most amazing grilled-cheese sandwich ever made?
嗯挺棒的
Mmm, it's pretty awesome.
亲爱的我的遗愿清单上没说
Honey, my bucket list doesn't say
"做一个挺棒的烤芝士三明治"
"make a pretty awesome grilled-cheese sandwich."
得回商店去
Gotta go back to the store.
我们要试另一种芝士
We're gonna get a different kind of cheese.
不不不伙计认真的
No, no, no, dude, seriously.
这就是世上最好吃的烤芝士三明治好吧
This is the most amazing grilled-cheese sandwich ever made, okay?
好下一条是啥
Okay. What's next?
嘿你在这呢哇你俩还在聊呢
Hey, there you are. Wow, you two are still talking?
Ben还没让你无聊到死啊
Ben hasn't bored you to death by now.
怎么说话呢 - 太无聊了
Hey. - So boring.
实际上我们聊得挺开心的
Actually, we were having a really great talk.
把你裤子穿好 - 啥
Keep your pants on. - What?
我是说你裤子穿得真好啊妹子
I mean, keep your pants on, girl!
我是说这些裤子可真是好啊
I mean, those are really nice pants.
我真的喜欢你的裤子你在哪买♥♥的啊
I really like your pants. Where'd you get them?
你想再去买♥♥裤子吗
Do you want to go buy some more pants?
或者嗯从这走开
Or, um, walk away from here?
实际上我觉得我的素材已经积累够了
Actually. I think I have everything I needed here,
但我可能会去那个世界末日聚会
but I might head over to that end of the world party.
哦那是所有废物们会去的地方呢
Oh, that's where all the losers are going.
是啊那是什么啊 Tom给我发邮件了
Yeah, what is that? Tom emailed me.
我可以去看看 - 呃...
I could check that out. - Hurrrrr...
嗯那你应该呆在这里
Well, then you should stay here then.
因为你不能走
Because you can't go.
我说如果Zorp出现的时候你不在这里呢
I mean, what if you're not here when Zorp shows up?
哎呀你的脸肯定会红的
Boy, would your face be red.
Zorp出现的时候
When Zorp shows up,
你的脸会融化被当作燃料
your faces will be melted off and used as fuel.
你想为了这个呆在这啊
You want to be here for that.
我觉得我还是赌一把吧
I think I'll take my chances.
Leslie 和往常一样多谢
Leslie, thanks as always.
哇真是让人难以置信地不舒服的人啊
Wow. What an unbelievably unpleasant person.
Melissa 进去享受一下吧 - 好的
Melissa, get in there with your bad self. - All right.
准备好了吗 - 准备好了
You ready? - I'm ready.
能抓到的都能留下
Anything you grab is yours to keep.
来吧
Hit it!
是的
Yes!
完美的聚会这是个难以捉摸的点子
The perfect party. It's an elusive idea.
人们需要从进来那一刻到出门那一刻之间完全参与娱乐
People have to be completely entertained from the moment they walk in, to the moment they leave.
这是个伟大的实验
It's a grand experiment.
而我...是个聚会科学家
And I... am a party scientist.
欢迎来到我的实验室
Welcome to my laboratory.
所以"理性派"最初占领镇子的时候你就住在这了吗
So you were living here when "Reasoneableism" first swept in?
是的 Lou Prozotovich 他们的创办人
I was. Lou Prozotovich, their founder,
是一个办公器材销♥售♥
was an office supplies salesman.
有一天他有了个有趣的点子
One day, he had an interesting idea.
可能他可以写一本书帮助人们整理办公室
Maybe he can write a book to help people organize their offices.
"整理吧"
"Organize it!"
这本书获得了巨大的成功
The book was a big success.
然后Lou有了另一个有趣的点子
Then Lou had another interesting thought.
可能有个长着火山嘴巴的八米半的大蜥蜴
Maybe there is a 28-foot tall lizard with a volcano for a mouth
在控制着宇宙 - 那挺有意思
who controls the universe. - That is interesting.
所以他写了第二本书
So he wrote a second book.
"整理吧2: 与Zorp连接"
"Organize it 2: Engage with Zorp"
你知道...我能看看吗
You know... could I have a look at that?
当然可以 Chris
Well sure you can, Chris.
留着都行
You can keep it.
我要是你就跳过前几章了
I'd skip the first couple of chapters if I were you,
私下讲直到Zorp出现才真正开始精彩
between you and me, it doesn't really get good till Zorp shows up.
Zorp就是那个蜥蜴
Zorp is the lizard.
我信什么教
What religion am I?
嗯我信的是不关你该死的事
Well, I'm a practicing none of your goddamn business.
好的我准备好了 - 好
Okay, I'm ready! - Good.
等等我还没准备好超级害怕
Wait! I'm not ready. Super scared.
Andy 你说过你想当个动作巨星的
Andy, you said you wanted to be an action star.
这就是你的机会
This is your chance.
好吧
Okay.
好你 Natalie 跟着动作走
Okay, you, Natalie, follow the action.
无所谓了 - 我该做什么
Whatever - What do I have to do?
就把这把黄油刀横在我脖子上
Just hold up this butter knife to my throat
然后假装你挟持我为人♥质♥
and pretend like you're holding me hostage.
什么 - 准备
What? - Ready!
我不知道看起来有点疯狂
I don't know. It seems a little crazy.
疯狂到刚好能行
Just crazy enough to work.
啊
Aah!
啊哦我的脸
Ahh! Oh, my face!
我的脸
My face!
没事啊 Mikhail Petrov
Is fine, Mikhail Petrov!
放弃吧 Macklin 你太晚了--
Forget it, Macklin, you're too late--
对不起伙计们 - Jerry
I'm sorry, guys. - Jerry!
我要戴眼镜我什么都看不--
I need my cheaters. I cannot see anyth--
你做得挺好你做得挺好
You're doing really good, you're doing really good.
真的吗 - 是的
Really? - Yeah.
救救我 Macklin特工救救我
Help me, Agent Macklin, help me!
他偷走了我的宝石现在他要抢夺我的身体了
He's stolen my jewels, and now he's going to ravish my body
他好臭啊他真的好臭
and he stinks, he really stinks!
好蛇洞Janet现在已经属于苏联母亲了
Okay, Janet Snakehole belongs to mother Russia now.
哦那是你这么想
Oh, that's what you think!
不 - 我希望你喜欢疼痛
No. - I hope you like pain!
啪
Pow!
说那句台词
Say the line.
看起来这条西伯利亚哈士奇
Looks like this Siberian husky
"速"
准备好"苏"...
is going to be Russian...
去监狱了
off to jail.
嘿那个我能走了吗 Gayle在做烤肉
Hey, know what, can I go? Gayle is making a roast.
恶
Ugh.
刚刚是《E小调人性的正义毁灭交响曲》
That was Symphony for the Righteous Destruction of Humanity in E minor.
作者是已故的Lou Prozotovich
By the late Lou Prozotovich.
提醒各位长笛可供购买♥♥
Reminder. These flutes are available for purchase.
你们可带不走
You can't take it with you people.
Herb 我刚刚速读完了你的两本书
Herb, I just speed-read both of your books.
哦 - 然后实话实说
Ooh. - And, full disclosure,
我觉得它们充满了疯狂
I think they're bonkers-filled.
但我的确注意到你对转世有兴趣
But I did notice that you're interested in reincarnation.
跟我讲讲吧
Tell me about that.
嗯很有道理不是吗
Well, it makes sense, doesn't it?
从宇宙中我们出现去宇宙中我们返回
From the universe, we emerge. Into the universe, we return.
我们在无穷多的宇宙中可以以无穷多的形式存在
And there are infinite forms we can take in infinite universes.
真是可爱的想法
What a lovely thought.
嗯今早日出时你就会有新的形式了
Well, this morning at dawn, you will take a new form.
一具失去肌肉的咔哒响的骨骼
That of a fleshless, chattering skeleton
因为测量者Zorp会降临用它的火山嘴烧掉你的肌肉
when Zorp the surveyor arrives and burns your flesh off with his volcano mouth.
这段话就说得很奇怪了
That was very strange what you just said.
我没有刚刚你说的那段那么喜欢
I don't like it as much as that other thing you said.
嘿嘿你要去哪儿你要前往哪里
Hey, hey, where you going? Where you headed off to?
你想跟我玩一个好玩的游戏
Do you want to play a fun game with me
叫棋战役吗我编的
that I made up called chess-risk?
一半是象棋一半是大战役需要花15个小时来玩
It's half chess, half risk and takes like 15 hours to play.
嗯是我觉得我该走了