摩登家庭
Modern Family S02E02
Part 1
Dec. 3, 2019, 1:07 p.m.
怎么盒子和盖子的数量不对应呢
How could we don't have the same number of containers and lids?
它们怎么会分开呢
Why would they ever get separated?
可能感情不和 也可能经济问题
Built-up resentment, money issues,
还可能跟年轻的盖子跑了
met a younger lid.
妈妈 我的科学作业哪去了
Mom, where's my science homework?
就在那边的桌子上
Uh, it's over there on the table.
艾丽克斯 宝贝 最近怎么样
So, Alex, honey, what's going on?
有啥新鲜事吗
Anything exciting?
没有
No.
-有喜欢的男孩吗 -没有
- Any boys? - No.
我觉得我和艾丽克斯之间
I'm feeling a little bit disconnected
有代沟了
from Alex right now.
就在上周
Last week, I picked up her cellphone,
我错拿了她的手♥机♥
thinking it was mine.
无意中看到几条暧昧短♥信♥
And I accidentally read a few flirty text messages
如果是她班上的某个男生干的
that were probably from a boy in her class,
那也就罢了
which is fine.
就怕是哪个混混发的
Or they're from a drifter.
来嘛 你就真没啥
Come on, isn't there something
要告诉你"马马"的吗
you want to share with your mommers?
有 别自称"马马"
Yeah. Don't call yourself "Mommers."
盒子想上盖子 盖子爆发了
He blew his lid when she tried to contain him.
你觉得这件怎么样
Okay. What do you think?
-我喜欢 -但不是特别喜欢
-I like it. -But you don't love it.
谁说的 我爱死它了
No, I do. I love it.
-和刚才那件比 -天
- As much as you loved the other one? - Ooh.
好吧
Okay. Mm.
房♥子着火了 我只来得及拿一件衬衫
The house is on fire. I only have time to grab one shirt.
我选谁
Which one do I take?
带上莉莉才是正解
The correct answer is take Lily.
那之后呢
After that.
好吧 拿蓝色的那件
Uh, okay, the blue one.
因为我穿灰色的显胖
Because the gray one washes me out.
不不不 别误会 小卡
No, no. Cam, you -- you can't go wrong here.
你不管穿什么都美翻了
Everything you've tried on looks great.
两件都好搭你
I love you in both of them.
还是你疼我
Oh, you're so nice to me.
米奇尔不喜欢在公众场合亲热
Mitchell has a problem with public displays of affection.
我记得有一年的新年派对上
Um, I remember once at a new year's eve party,
零点钟声一响 他和我击掌庆祝
stroke of midnight, he high-fived me.
两个问题
Two problems with that --
首先 同志不击掌
One, gays don't high-five.
其次 同志不击掌
Two, gays don't high-five.
我回来啦
I'm home!
烧什么呢这么香
Mmm, what smells so good?
我在做圈圈肉 哥伦比亚名菜呢
I'm making chunchullo, a traditional Colombian dish,
为了今晚的家庭聚餐准备的
for dinner with the family tonight.
圈圈肉
Chunchullo.
那是啥 跟玉米卷差不多吗
What is that -- like, uh, tacos?
对 就跟玉米卷似的
Yes, like tacos.
才不是呢
No, it isn't.
-这是猪肠做的 -我的老天爷
- It's the small intestine of a pig. - Oh, Geez.
我们就不能像其他人一样吃正常点儿吗
Why can't we eat regular food like normal people?
我跟你说过滴 杰
I told you, Jay.
我那远在天国的奶奶
My grandmother, who rests in peace,
曾经托梦给我
has been coming to me in my dreams,
告诫我不要忘本
telling me that I'm losing touch with my roots.
你看 这下尴尬了
See, this is awkward,
因为我死了的叔叔告诉我今晚该吃牛排
because my dead uncle joe told me to have steak tonight.
不不不 杰 放尊重点
No, no, no, Jay. Have some respect.
我奶奶能听见你滴
My grandmother can hear you.
什么意思 她能听到我们吗
What do you mean, she can hear us?
是这样滴 在我们的文化里
Well, in our culture,
我们相信死者的灵魂就在我们身边
we believe that the dead are all around us.
她说的对 曼尼
She's right, Manny.
可能现在她就在你背后
She could be right here,
从坟墓里伸出她那瘦骨嶙峋的手指
her bony fingers reaching out from the grave.
厉害哦 杰 继续忽悠呀
Yeah, keep it up, Jay.
这房♥子里已经有一个死人了
There's already one dead person in this room.
你也想死是哇
You want to make it two?
我错了 我去装打印机
I'm sorry. I've got a printer to install.
歌♥洛莉亚 麻烦让你奶奶
Oh, Gloria, have your grandmother
十分钟后给我拿杯冰红茶来
run me up an iced tea in about 10 minutes.
是啊 她要活着滴话干得比你好
Yeah, she has a better chance of making that work than you!
你打电♥话♥给菲尔啊 省得一会你搞砸了又叫又骂
Why don't you save us the stomping and the swearing and call Phil?
他这方面比较牛
He's good at that stuff.
能有我牛
Better than me?
菲尔任何方面都没我牛
Phil's not better than me at anything,
他也就只会怪叫啥的
Except maybe making that stupid sound with his mouth.
咋 咋样
A what, what
你口水喷我脸上了
You spit on me.
宝贝海莉 来帮我个忙
Haley, honey, um, I need you to do something for me.
啊 妈 我手痛
Ugh. Mom, my arm hurts.
你都不知道我找你啥事
Why don't you find out what it is
着急编瞎话干嘛
before you start making up excuses to get out of it?
好吧 说吧
Okay, what is it?
我要你去和你妹妹谈谈
I need you to talk to your sister.
我觉得她和某个男孩子有暧昧
I think that there's something going on with her and a boy.
然后
So?
然后 我是你们的妈妈
So, I am your mother, and it is my job to make sure
确保你们不被坏蛋给剥皮吃了
that you girls don't get involved with a predator.
得了吧 妈妈 别再看新闻联播了
Okay, mom, stop watching "Dateline."
你自己怎么不去和她谈
And why can't you just talk to her?
我试过了
I have tried to talk to her.
她不会跟我开口的 你懂的
I -- she won't talk to me. You know that.
因为一有男孩接近我们你就变得神经质
That's because you get so weird every time a boy comes near us.
我只是不想你们这些女孩子
I-I just don't want you girls to --
-重蹈你的覆辙吗 -不是
- To make the same mistakes that you did? - No!
当然不是
No.
老妈 我又不傻
Mom, I'm not an idiot.
我看得出来
I pick up on things.
你可不是你口中描述的
And I don't think that you were the good girl
那种好女孩
you pretend you were.
天哪 你大错特错了
Wow. That is so untrue.
你不知道我以前有多乖
I was a very good girl. Mm.
孩子不需要知道
Your kids don't need to know
他们只需了解你想要的完美形象
They need to know who you wish you were,
还必须以你为榜样
and they need to try to live up to that person.
他们可能达不到这个标准
They're gonna fall short,
但参照人物是虚构的完美的你
but better they fall short of the fake you
肯定比真实的你强
than the real you.
所以我们从不隐瞒
Which is why we don't hide anything.
你说的和我的刚好相反
That's the opposite of what I just said.
我溜号♥了
I was not listening.
我还得说一遍 我喜欢你穿这件佩斯利
I'll say it again -- I love you in paisley.
不如先关好门 拉好窗帘
Oh, let me lock the door and draw the curtains.
你什么意思
What does that mean?
-什么意思都没有 -很好
-It doesn't mean anything. -Good.
你当然知道我什么意思
You know exactly what it means.
你不在别人面前亲我
You won't kiss me in front of other people
是因为你不能正视自己
because you're ashamed of who you are.
没错 我就是戳你痛处了
And, yes...I went there.
你不能拿戳我当乐事
Okay, you can't say, "Yes, I went there,"
还企图用过去式
when you go there all the time.
再说了 每次飞机上有人对咱们另眼相待
And, by the way, I'm the one who makes speeches on airplanes
可都是我站出来教育他们
every time someone looks at us weird.
我爸爸说你是我"朋友"的时候
I'm the one who gives my dad hell
也是我跟他挑明挖烂了理论
when he refers to you as my "Friend."
那不一样 那是正面冲突
That's different. That's confrontation.
但你知道什么才最需要勇气吗
But you know what takes real strength?
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