-我要去打高尔夫了 -不行 等等
- I'm going golfing. - No.
他人很好 在杂货店工作
He's a very nice man that works at the grocery store
需要一些业务咨♥询♥
and needs a little bit of business advice.
怎么早不说呢
Oh, why didn't you say so?
我还以为他是住在
I thought he was just some nut
干洗店的无赖呢
who lived behind the dry cleaner's.
我们上个月帮他矫正鞋那家伙才是
Oh, that's the guy we bought corrective shoes for last month.
杰 他知道你很成功
Jay, he knows how successful you are,
他只是需要你给一小时 或半小时
And all he wants is an hour of your t-- half-hour.
十分钟 我跟他保证过
10 minutes. I promise him!
亲爱的 我爱你
Honey, I love you,
但是你为什么拉我搀和进去呢
but why do you drag me into these things?
你要学会拒绝别人
You've got to learn to say no to people.
好 那你先问问我让不让你去打高尔夫
Fine. Ask me if you can go golfing now.
是拒绝其他人
Other people.
我想要的不过是 晚上睡觉时
All I want is, when I go to bed at night,
身边躺着的是一个慷慨而乐施的男人
to be laying next to a man that is generous and giving.
看来我要换个人躺了
And that man doesn't necessarily need to be you.
行 那我们过去吧
Okay, let's do this.
好的 吉尔莫
Okay. Guillermo!
需要我把废纸篓放近一点吗
Do you want me to move the waste basket closer to you?
-不用了 在哪儿都一样 -是吗
- Oh, no. It's fine where it is. - Really?
但床看上去像花车游♥行♥的彩车
'cause the bed kind of looks like a rose parade float.
谢谢你照顾我
Thank you for taking care of me.
这是应该的
Well, what else would I be doing?
当然还应该去看女神卡卡
Um, seeing lady gaga, that's what.
小卡 我也不想现在就提这茬
So, uh, Cam, you know, I hate to bring this up,
但是那演唱会怎么办
but what are we gonna do about that concert?
什么意思
What do you mean?
你知道的 我们都想去看
Well, you know, we were both looking forward to going.
你想去看
You were looking forward to going.
我是真的很想去看
I was really looking forward to going.
而且 我不想眼睁睁看着门票浪费了
And I just -- I-I hate to see those tickets go to waste.
我知道 我知道
I know, I know.
那我们还有什么办法吗
But what are our options?
我们可以一起去看演唱会
We could both go to the concert.
还是算了吧
That's not gonna happen.
我们可以到网上把票卖♥♥掉
Uh, well, we could sell the tickets online.
不过一转手到网上就掉价了
But there's that craigslist killer.
咋办呢 咋办呢
Oh, what to do? What to do?
咋办呢 咋办呢
What to do? What to do? What to do?
想办法 想办法
Other options, other options.
米奇尔 你是在暗示
Mitchell, are you hinting
你要丢下我独自去看演唱会
that you want to go to that concert without me?
不 不 绝不可能
No! No! Not in a million years!
但我很欣慰你主动提议
But that's very sweet of you to offer.
-我没提议任何事 -真的吗
- I didn't offer.- Oh, really?
感觉你就应该会说
'cause that just seems like something that you would say
你去吧 我没事
"You go, I'll be fine.
你为了买♥♥票倾尽所有
You spent all the money on the tickets,
我会乖乖躺在床上等你回来的
And I'm just gonna lie in bed anyways."
这才是小卡的作风
That's classic Cam.
-我太虚弱了 -好吧 行
- I'm just so weak. - Okay, good.
那就这样吧
You know what? It's settled.
咱们就忘掉
We're just gonna put this whole
"你坚持要我自己去看演唱会"
"You insisting I go to the concert without you"
这回事吧
thing behind us.
其实呢
You know what?
其实什么
What?
我能吃一小杯布丁吗
Can I get one of my little pudding cups?
可以 当然可以拉
Yes, you can. Yes.
你是欢乐地吃布丁
You eat the pudding,
哥是含泪要吞票
and I'll eat the tickets.
多谢您的款待 普里契特先生
Thanks for your dining, Mr.Pritchett.
但等会你听过我的报告之后
But after you hearing my presentation,
你就会反过来谢我了
you will be thanking me.
你倒是很自信 这点我很欣赏
Well, you've got confidence. I admire that.
他看好你哦 吉尔莫
He admires that, Guillermo.
表现不错 再接再厉
You're doing great. Keep going.
你是否知道 仅去年一年
Are you aware that last year,
美国人就在驯犬上花费了四百亿美元
Americans spent $40 billion on dog training?
压根没这回事
Well, that's not true.
我和你一样 对此大跌眼镜
I was surprised as you are.
你跌眼镜是因为压根没这回事
No, you were surprised because it's not true.
嘘 接着说 吉尔莫
Shh! Go on, Guillermo.
这个价值数十亿的产业 究竟缺失了什么呢
What is this multibillion-dollar industry missing?
好一个"数十亿"
Multibillion dollars.
我提出了一个革命性的人犬交互方案...
I have devised a revolutionary way to communicate --
听着 我无意打断你的长篇大论
Listen, I hate to interrupt your big pitch,
但是你的狗狗在啃我家抱枕
but your dog is chewing my pillow.
太妙了
This is fantastic.
对我家枕头来说 一点也不妙
It's not fantastic for my pillow.
这是个供我展示"好狗狗坏狗狗"
It's a perfect opportunity for me to demonstrate
驯犬系统的绝妙机会
the good doggie bad doggie training system.
-我们一定入股 -等下 慢着
- We're in! - Wait, slow down.
枕头的问题你打算怎么解决
What are we gonna do about the pillow situation?
现在就是见证奇迹的时刻
Watch, and be amazed.
斯黛拉现在不乖
Stella here is being a bad doggie.
斯黛拉 松口 坏狗狗 坏狗狗
Stella, let go. Bad dog, bad dog.
坏狗狗 坏狗狗会得到什么呢
Bad dog. And what does a bad dog get?
一块坏狗狗奖励
A bad-doggie treat.
等一下
Wait a minute.
你是奖励她干坏事吗
You give her a treat for doing something bad?
这是坏狗狗奖励
Ah, a bad-doggie treat.
等她乖了 就能得到好狗狗奖励
When she is good, she gets the good-doggie treat.
天才啊 我们要发啦
Brilliant! We're going to be rich!
慢着慢着慢着
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
这个坏狗狗好狗狗的奖励
What is the difference between a bad-doggie treat
究竟有什么区别
and the good-doggie treat?
都是培根 但坏狗狗奖励淡而无味
Bacon. The bad-doggie treat is very bland.
我看她好像挺喜欢吃的
But she seems like she likes it.
等看完好狗狗奖励再说吧
Wait till you see the good-doggie treat.
斯黛拉 坐下
Stella, sit.
现在是好狗狗奖励
Now a good-doggie treat.
好吧 刚才坏狗狗奖励吃撑了
Okay, uh, she's still full from the bad-doggie treat.
不过这就是
But there you have it --
好狗狗坏狗狗驯犬系统
the good doggie bad doggie training system.
欢迎来到发财之路的开端
Welcome to the ground floor.
其实 你的狗正在我家地板尿尿呢
Actually, she's peeing on the ground floor.
快点 快给她一块坏狗狗奖励
Quick, quick, give her a bad-doggie treat!
喂
Hello?
喂 是我 不方便接电♥话♥吗
Hey, it's me. Is this a bad time?
没有 我在车里呢
No, I'm just in the car.
好吧 我陷入了良知的挣扎
Okay, I'm having a moral dilemma.
我们买♥♥了女神卡卡今晚演唱会的票 但是小卡病了
We have tickets for lady gaga tonight, but Cam's sick.
那我去
I'll take them.
但你根本不喜欢演唱会
Wait, you don't even like concerts.
我喜欢 我现在是享乐派
Yes, I do. I'm fun now.
克莱尔 他们说要满十三岁
Claire, they said we have to be at least 13
才能开快车
to ride the fast ones.
他们满十三了 没事的
They're 13. It's fine.
这可把我整糊涂了
This is very confusing.
上次去电影院时 她说我十一岁
At movie theaters, she says I'm 11.
-咱能接着谈我的事吗 -什么
- Can we get back to me? - What?
如果抛下他去看演唱会
Does it make me a horrible person
我会不会显得很没人性啊
that I kind of want to go without him?
他病得有多厉害
Well, how sick is he?
不好说 就是病了
I don't know. He's sick.
没到要帮他做回忆录的程度
You know, they're not gonna make a lifetime movie about him.
那你生病的时候 他表现得怎样
Well, what's he like when you're sick?
剧集 | 摩登家庭 | 导航列表