牧场趣事（2016）
The Ranch
第一季
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牧场趣事（2016）
The Ranch S01E20
Part 2
June 24, 2021, 11:24 a.m.
带娃带得怎么样
How's babysitting going?
啊 不是你们看起来的这样
Uh, it's not what it looks like.
看起来就是我正准备对着他的鸡鸡扔蜜橘
Unless it looks like I am throwing a tangerine at his penis.
基本上 我们就是给宝宝读读书 但是 行吧
Generally, we just read to the baby, but, okay.
所以 你们在干嘛
So, what's going on here?
你们喝了六瓶啤酒 一瓶都没收
You drank six beers and cleaned up zero?
什么 不是
What? No, um...
我们在给宝宝做风铃呢
we've been making a mobile for the baby.
我应该哄Kiera睡觉了
You know, I should put Kiera down.
是的 我来帮你吧
Yes. Ah, let me help you.
Darlene 你喜欢造人吗
Darlene, do you enjoy making babies?
好吧 我们得谈谈了
All right, we need to talk.
刚才对不起
Yeah, sorry about that.
我们准备收拾来着 没想到你们回来得这么快
We were gonna clean up, but I didn't think you'd be back so soon.
不是因为这个
Yeah, it's not just that.
也不是因为你想用鸡鸡甩我们的东西
Or the fact you were about to dick slap our produce.
呃 听着
No, it's, um... Listen.
现在的情况 我已经有点撑不下去了
I am barely keeping it together as it is, okay?
我每周在饼干桶餐厅工作50个小时
I work 50 hours a week at the Cracker Barrel.
我两个女儿都跟我住
I got both my daughters living with me.
宝宝Kiera 这周还有我的外孙Luke
And baby Kiera, and my grandson Luke during the week.
我家已经够"欢乐满屋"了
I already have a full house.
<欢乐满屋>是ABC台经典喜剧
网飞在买♥♥过版权后于2016年推出衍生剧<欢乐更满屋>
我实在不能再"欢乐更满屋"了
I do not think I can take a fuller house.
我靠
Oh, shit.
如果你还想让我们未来有机会在一起
But if we have any shot at a future together,
你必须在我杀了你之前从我的屋子离开
you have got to get the fuck out of my house before I kill you.
好
All right.
我尊重你
I respect that.
我可以 我会去Berto家将就一下或什么的
I can, uh, you know... I'll just crash at Berto's or something.
谢谢你 谢谢 谢谢
Thank you, thank you, thank you.
呼 好了
Phew! All right, well...
我来帮你收拾 我会拉上Berto 从这儿滚蛋
Let me help clean up, I'll grab Berto and get out of here.
好 在你走之前
Okay, before you go...
来看看你能不能做到这件事
let's see if you can do this thing.
好啊
All right.
我就是觉得你不应该拿你自己
I just don't think you should compare yourself
跟我们的救世主耶稣相提并论
to our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
不是 我只是说我跟耶稣有一些相似之处 你知道吗
No, I'm just saying me and JC got some similarities, you know?
我们都有超帅的胡子
We both got kick-ass beards.
圣诞节就要来了 我没地方可去
Christmas is coming, I got no place to stay.
有一次 我用射钉枪的时候
And one time, I was using my nail gun
不小心把自己钉到木板上了
and I accidentally attached myself to a two-by-four.
嗯
Mmm.
还有次我们不得不给你洗胃
That time we had to pump your stomach,
你那次确实是从死亡边缘复活过来了
you literally came back from the dead.
看到没
See?
好吧
Well...
我也有我自己的奇迹
I have a miracle of my own.
我要去把啤酒变成水了
I'm going to turn some beer into water.
你圣诞节干嘛 Hank
What you doin' for Christmas, Hank?
我要等到12月来的时候才开始担心这个
I'll worry about that when December rolls around.
呃 Hank
Uh... Hank.
靠
Oh, shit.
感恩节我都干了什么
What the hell did I do for Thanksgiving?
妈 我想跟你聊一下
Ma, I need to talk.
嗨
What's up?
圣诞节快乐 Hank
Merry Christmas, Hank.
不要哪壶不开提哪壶
Don't rub it in.
怎么了 Colt
What's up, Colt?
爸爸跟我说你在逼他卖♥♥掉牧场
Dad told me you're making him sell the ranch
因为他不愿意给一半给Rooster
'cause he won't give half to Rooster.
等下 什么
Wait, what?
我这是为了你们俩考虑
I'm doing it for you guys.
至少你们能从中拿点钱
At least you'll get some money from the proceeds.
我不想要白给的钱 我想在那里工作
I don't want free money. I wanna work there.
哇哦 这句话是从哪儿冒出来的
Whoa. Where the hell did that come from?
等一下
Hang on a sec.
你和爸要卖♥♥了牧场
You and Dad are gonna sell the ranch,
因为他不肯把我名字写上
because he won't put my name on it?
谁在乎啊
Who cares?
你不想跟我工作吗 你是个傻♥逼♥
And you don't wanna work with me? You're a fucking idiot.
我是想保护你
I'm trying to protect you.
不 我理解 妈 但是我不需要保护
No, I get that, Mom, but I don't need protection.
我已经有一个新工作新未来了 我都准备好了
I got the new job with a future. I'm all set.
而且 反正如果爸死了 Colt就会把我的一半给我的
Plus, once Dad's gone, Colt's just gonna give me my half anyway.
我是说 我们肯定会讨论的
I mean... we'll definitely talk about it.
看 你卖♥♥了牧场 你只会伤害他
Look, you sell the ranch, you're just gonna hurt him,
你可能最终会杀了爸
you might end up killing Dad.
没门 我不想违背良心那么做
No way. I do not wanna deal with that on my conscience.
我只是不明白为什么你♥爸♥应该决定谁得到什么
I just don't see why your father should decide who gets what.
那不就是你正在做的吗
Isn't that exactly what you're doing?
我是说 这是我们的牧场
I mean, this is our ranch.
是你的牧场 是家庭牧场
It's your ranch. It's the family ranch.
<大章克申前哨>报的
The Grand Junction Sentinel
文章标题"Colt Bennett怎么了"
article entitled "What Happened to Colt Bennett?"
开头就是 "Colt Bennett
starts with, "Colt Bennett
被迫撤回到他的家庭牧场"
was forced to retreat to his family ranch."
你还记得写你有多糟的文章
You memorized an article about how bad you are?
我记得写曾经我有多棒的文章
I memorized an article about how good I once was.
重点是 这是我们的牧场
The point is, it's our ranch.
你真的同意这样吗
Are you really gonna be okay with this?
当然 它必须留在家里
Of course. It's gotta stay in the family.
我一直是那么觉得的
I felt that way all along,
但是你♥爸♥把我气疯了
but then your dad just made me so crazy,
我可能忘记了长远未来
I might have lost sight of the big picture.
是啊 长远未来就是我和Abby和我们的孩子
Yeah, well, the big picture is me and Abby and our kids,
坐在走廊上 看Rooster在我的牧场工作
sitting on the porch, watching Rooster work on my ranch.
重点是让你们两个都开心
The point was to make you both happy,
所以如果这是你们想要的 那么
so if this is what you want, then...
不 这是对大家最好的
No, this is what's best for everyone.
快看啊 牺牲小我成全大我
Look at that. Me making sacrifices for the greater good.
我就像耶稣一样
I am like Jesus.
我真的该开始锁门了
I really gotta start locking this door.
嘿 Beau
Hi, Beau.
我现在不想吵架 Maggie
I'm not sure I can do this right now, Maggie.
不 你可以把牧场留给Colt
No, you can leave the ranch to Colt.
没事的 我就要打猎的小木屋
It's all right. I'll just take the hunting cabin.
我让Jerry重新起草了文件
I had Jerry draw up a new draft of the papers.
显然 旧的那份
Evidently, the old one...
空白的地方被人写了太多脏话
had too many curse words scrawled in the margins.
你能接受吗
You're okay with that?
Rooster能 这才是重要的
Rooster is, and that's what's important.
他很关心这个牧场
He cared enough about this ranch
他牺牲了自己的那份让它留在家里
that he sacrificed his piece to keep it in the family.
好吧
All right.
我想除了签字现在也没别的事可做了
I guess there's nothing left to do but to sign it.
是啊 那是我们唯一要做的
Yeah, that's all we gotta do.
我先来
I'll go first.
我想就这样了
I guess that's it.
是的
Yep.
政♥府♥终于有我的签字了
The government finally has my name on something.
感觉很奇怪 是吧
Feels strange, doesn't it?
是啊
Yeah.
40年的婚姻 消失在几个签名里
It's 40 years of marriage gone in... A couple of signatures.
现在我们怎么办
What do we do now?
我不知道
I don't know.
开始新生活吧 我想
We start our new lives, I guess.
也许我们应该注册Tinder的账号♥
Maybe we should sign up for Tinder.
Tinder特么是什么
What the fuck is Tinder?
牧场趣事（2016）
The Ranch
剧集 | 牧场趣事（2016） | 导航列表