牧场趣事（2016）

The Ranch S01E09

Part 1 June 24, 2021, 11:22 a.m.

你从哪儿学的这样煮咖啡的
Where'd you learn to make coffee like this?
野外露营的时候
Campin.
我曾经是女童子军
I was a Girl Scout.
女童子军 - 对啊
A Girl Scout? - Yeah.
现在还有那个制♥服♥吗
Still got the uniform?
有啊但是现在穿太小了而且闻起来一股曲奇味儿
Yeah, but it's too small and it smells like cookies.
停别说
All right, stop.
我已经想好圣诞节要什么礼物了
I know what I want for Christmas.
Colt 你这个混♥蛋♥ 你又用我的浴巾
Colt, you used my towel again, asshole.
不好意思啊
Oh, yeah. Sorry about that.
只不过因为断电所以当时浴室里什么都看不见
It's just so dark up in the bathroom with the power out,
我也不知道我拿了什么
I don't know what I'm reaching for.
但是我还要再向你坦白一件事
But, full disclosure...
我有可能用了你没扔进
I may have wiped with the sock
洗衣筐的袜子抹了地
that you left outside by the hamper.
那我也要坦白我一直穿的是你的袜子
Full disclosure, I've been wearing your socks.
我是不是不应该再把衣服带到这儿来了
Should I not bring clothes over here anymore?
走吧上班去 - 好
Come on, let's go to work. - Yeah.
谢谢你亲爱的 - 嗯
Thank you, darling. - Mmm-hmm.
今晚有空吗
Hey, you wanna meet up tonight?
我不知道今晚我应该要和我姐姐Darlene一起出去
I don't know. I'm supposed to hang out with my sister, Darlene.
她刚刚经历了一场痛苦的失恋
She just got through a really bad breakup.
痛苦的失恋吗我听说她挺正的
Bad breakup, huh? She sounds hot.
她确实挺正的
She is hot.
而且她终于摆脱了他那个整天游手好闲的混♥蛋♥男友
And she finally got rid of that deadbeat asshole of a boyfriend.
是吗
Oh.
那有没有可能
Well, would you say
那种游手好闲的混♥蛋♥就是她的菜
deadbeat assholes are kind of her type?
拜托她才刚刚经历一段失败的感情
Hey, she just got out of a relationship.
没错她前任男友在她生完孩子后就立马拍屁♥股♥走人了
Yeah, her ex left her right after the baby was born.
不过这也可能是发展一段新恋情的好机会
Might be a good change for her to go out with a nice guy.
嗯哼 - 对我们一致认为
Mmm-hmm. - Yeah, so we're in agreement.
他不应该和Rooster一起出去约会
She should not go out with Rooster.
别说了 Rooster人挺好的
Stop, he is a good guy.
也许我们可以来场四人约会
Maybe the four of us could go out.
Rooster不喜欢相亲所以
Rooster don't like blind dates, so...
不啊我挺喜欢的
Oh, uh, hell yeah, I do.
我是觉得约会就像钓鱼你知道吗
I mean, dating is like fishing, you know?
你有可能在岸边坐一整天却一条鱼都钓不到
You can sit on the water all day and not catch a bite.
但是相亲呢
But a blind date?
就像是一个人开着船
That's like a guy drives up
然后有人主动把鱼扔给你
in a boat and just throws you a fish.
而你唯一要做的就是洗干净然后吃了它
After that, all you gotta do is clean it and eat it.
你是有多恨你姐啊
You must really hate your sister.
别胡说一定会很有趣的
Stop. It'll be fun.
我保证到时候我会通知Darlene的 - 好的
Promise. I'll tell Darlene. - Mmm-hmm.
记得打我电♥话♥ - 我会的
Call me later. - Yeah.
对了别忘了把你那件童子军的制♥服♥找出来
Oh, hey, don't forget to look for that Girl Scout uniform.
兄弟你也听到了肯定会很有意思的
Hey, you hear that, pal? It'll be fun.
等一下
Hey. Hey.
你不能和Darlene约会
Yo, come on. You cannot go out with Darlene.
为什么不能 - 因为
Why not? - 'Cause I've...
我现在和Heather关系很稳定而且我
got a good thing going with Heather, and I'd...
我知道你对付女人的那一套
I just... I know how you are with women.
你是想说很赞吗
You mean awesome?
是啊赞到Cindy Wilson划了你的车
Yeah, so awesome that Cindy Wilson keyed your car?
那只是个意外
That was an accident.
是吗那她也是不小心在你车上写
Yeah, oh, she accidentally wrote,
"Rooster Bennett有根小鸡♥巴♥"
"Rooster Bennett's got a tiny penis"?
纠正一下她写的是"Roostere Bennett有根小钢笔"
Technically, she wrote, "Rooster Bennett's got a tiny pen,"
因为我正好把她抓个现行
cause I caught her.
那也就是为什么
That's why I bought all
我为了不让人起疑买♥♥这么多小钢笔的原因
those tiny pens just to not confuse anybody.
那Tammy又怎么解释
What about Tammy?
那女人简直疯了她把你的内♥裤♥用火点着了
She was so pissed, she set your underwear on fire.
所以呢这有什么大惊小怪的
So? Big deal.
可是你当时还穿着那条内♥裤♥呢
You were still wearing 'em!
听好了那些都是陈年旧事了
Look, man, that was a long time ago, all right?
我不会去破坏你和Heather的感情的
I'm not gonna do anything to mess up you and Heather.
好吧那你就好好表现
All right. Just behave.
当然了我的中间名就叫那个
Yeah, that's my middle name.
Janeson "Rooster" "好好表现" "巨♥屌♥♥" Bennett
Jameson "Rooster" "Behave" "Big Dick" Bennett.
天啊累死我了
Man, I'm exhausted.
我也是
Yeah, me too.
就算现在有人告诉我
If somebody told me there was
那个田里有一百万美刀
a million dollars out in that field,
我都不知道还有没有力气捡起来
I don't know if I could go pick it up.
今晚还去酒吧吗
Still going to the bar, right?
当然
Oh, hell yeah.
你们是怎么做到每天精疲力竭的情况下
How is it that you two are so tired at the end of every day,
还能打起精神
but you still muster enough energy
出去夜夜笙歌♥
to go out drinking every night?
因为真正热爱一件事是不会觉得累的
'Cause it ain't work when you're doing something you love.
那是妈妈吗
That Mom?
对
Yeah.
她说她想谈一谈
Said she wanted to talk.
尽管这听起来如此有趣
Oh, well, as fun as that sounds,
我想我还是像Colt一样抛弃这个家吧
I'm gonna make like Colt and abandon this family.
虽然我很反感
I resent that.
但是我要说明一点爸我会一直与你待在外面的
And just to prove a point, I'll stay out here with you, Dad.
嘿老妈
Hey, Ma.
Colt我能和你♥爸♥私下谈一谈吗
Colt, could we have a minute?
有何不可
I gave it a shot.
Maggie 我知道我之前跟你保证我会跟你谈谈但是
Maggie, I know I said I could talk, but...
我从今早4点就起来到现在就没歇过
I've been up since 4:00 this morning.
不如我们改天再谈
How about we do this another day?
除非你有什么好消息要说
Unless you've got some really good news.
我给我俩约了个时间去进行夫妻咨♥询♥
I made us an appointment to go to counseling.
那可不是什么好消息
That wasn't it.
我知道你不愿敞开心扉
I know you don't wanna talk about your feelings.
就像那天在加油站别人问你过得怎么样的时候
When the guy at the gas station says, "How you doing?"
你却叫他别多管闲事
you tell him to stop prying.
如果我想让他知道他自会清楚
If I wanted him to know, he'd know.
好吧那
Okay, well...
我不想跟你离婚
I don't wanna get divorced.
我这个人既讨厌和陌生人说话也讨厌花钱
Well, I hate talking to strangers and I hate spending money.
你现在是让我这两样事都做全了吗
Now you're asking me to do both?
不是我们不需要付钱
No. We won't have to pay...
而且我们也不必和陌生人说话
and it won't be a total stranger.
我的读书会里有一个正规的心理治疗师叫Priscilla
Priscilla, in my book club, she's a licensed therapist.
她帮助过Noreen跟Will
She helped out Noreen and Will.
Will为了饲料商店的Stan抛弃了Norren
Will left Noreen for Stan at the feed store.
但是她帮助Will去意识到他内心的真实感受
And she helped Will to realize his true feelings.
我20年前就能告诉Will去顺从自己的内心
I could've told Will that 20 years ago.
我是真的觉得她能帮到我们
I really do think it will help us.
她是一个婚姻方面的专家
She's an expert on marriage.
那是什么让她担起专家的这个名号♥呢
And what makes her an expert?
难道就因为你们读书会里
The fact that your book club read
读了那本<廊桥遗梦>
Bridges of Madison County?
现在是我一年中最忙的时节
This is my busiest time of the year.
我知道你很忙
I know you're busy.
但是总有一个理由让你暂缓一下
But there'll always be a reason to put it off.
我同意我们永远都别做这件事就好了
All right, we agree. Let's never do it.
你是想让我搬回来的对吗
You want me to move back in, right?
当然啊
Course I do.
那唯一能让我搬回来的方法
Well, the only way that's gonna happen
就是我们重新开始多沟通
is if we start connecting more.
我真的认为这可以帮助我们去见Priscilla
I really do think it would help us to see Priscilla.
到时候如果你想的话我还可以请你吃汉堡
And afterwards, I'll treat you to a burger if you want.
想撬开我的嘴巴最少要请我吃顿牛排
If I'm sharing feelings, I'm eating steak.