摩登家庭

Modern Family S11E02

Part 4 Nov. 23, 2019, 10:43 a.m.

你的瑞典保姆
your Swedish nanny!
而你整整三年
And you told your entire Girl Scout troop
都对其他的女童子军小伙伴说你妈死了
for three years that your mother was dead!
你们嫌弃我一辈子了
You have been embarrassed by me your whole lives.
我就嫌弃这一天
I get one day!
《第一把娇椅》
值了
Worth it.
欢迎回家
Welcome home.
-需要些什么吗 -不必了
- How can I help you? - I'm fine.
我只想简单弄点吃的
I'm just gonna make something simple.
从你的日历来看
According to your calendar,
你此刻本该和队员们聚餐
you should be at your team dinner right now.
我没去成因为上个会议开得太久了
Well, I couldn't make it because my last meeting went so long.
-所以 -你听起来累坏了
- So... - You sound stressed.
我又不会分身术
Well, can't be three places at once.
做晚饭前要不要先来杯马蒂尼
How about a martini before we get started on dinner?
有时有个倾听者感觉很好
Sometimes it's just nice to be heard.
酱汁闻起来妙极了
This sauce smells divine.
接下来做什么
Okay, what's next?
再来一杯鸡尾酒
Another cocktail?
天啊布丽吉特
Oh, gosh! Bridget!
你是想灌醉我吗
Are you trying to get me drunk?
这是这是什么情况
What-What -- Okay, what's-what's going on here?
布丽吉特和我在做意面
Well, Bridget and I are making pasta.
我本希望今晚能和她一起做晚餐呢
I-I was kind of hoping to cook with her tonight.
该预热烤箱了喀麦隆
Time to pre-heat the oven, Cameroon.
"喀麦隆"
"Cameroon?"
那是什么昵称吗
What-What is that, a pet name?
不我输入时按错了
No, I typed it in wrong,
但我挺喜欢的
but I-I kind of like it.
好吧
Oh, okay.
你今晚不是本该
Hey, well, aren't-aren't you supposed to be
去和队员聚餐吗
at a team dinner tonight?
今天特别不顺
Oh. It was a very bad day.
我不想提了
I don't want to talk about it.
他的会议延长了
His meeting went long.
他又不会分身术
He can't be in three places at once.
听起来你愿意跟某人提
Sounds like you want to talk to someone about it.
不是吗
You know?
抱歉抱歉
Okay, I-I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
我不该再给你添堵了
I s-I shouldn't be piling on.
你才说过今天过得不顺
You just said you've had a bad day.
我是不小心打扰到什么吗
Am I interrupting something?
没有啊
Hmm-mnh, nope.
你给布丽吉特买♥♥花了吗
You bought Bridget flowers?
米奇尔这是装饰厨房♥用的花
Mitchell, they are for the kitchen.
我把它冰进去
I just put them in there
纯粹是不想在你到家之前就凋谢嘛
so they wouldn't wilt before you got home.
这样吧
Hey, you know what?
你去开一瓶酒怎么样
Why don't you go open a bottle of wine?
行吧
Okay.
那你... 你想要喝红酒还白酒
Yeah, do you -- do you want red or white?
也可以两瓶都开反正我们有3个人
I could open both. There are three of us.
自♥拍♥吗
A selfie?!
这这是在干嘛呢
What -- What is going on here?!
米奇尔你不会吃这种飞醋吧
Mitchell, you can't be jealous.
这只是台冰箱啊
It's just a refrigerator.
我才不吃醋咧
Oh, I'm not jealous.
我跟布丽吉特也有属于我二人的东西
Bridget and I, we have our own thing.
你这算什么
Okay?
♪ 身处浅滩 ♪
♪ In the sha-la, shallow ♪
♪ 身处浅滩啦啦啦 ♪
♪ In the sha-la-la-la-la-low ♪
哎哟一个不小心
Oopsie daisy.
你想对这些花干嘛
What are you doing with those flowers?
我把花拿出来摆到别的地方啊
I'm putting these in another room.
-不行这是拿来装饰厨房♥的 -是吗
- No, they are for the kitchen! - Are they for the kitchen?
-还是想送她 -米奇尔
- Or are they for her? - Mitchell --
-小卡 -这是要...
- Cam... - They're for...
够了这... 我们这是在闹哪样
Okay, this -- What are we doing?
这个冰箱要害我们家破人亡了
This refrigerator is tearing us apart.
我们我们应该...
We -- We should've --
我们应该学习胡娇夫夫的教训
We should've learned from Pepper and Ronaldo. Okay?
他们... 那场"三人行"差点家破人亡
Their -- Their threesome nearly destroyed them.
他们三个人去看婚姻咨♥询♥师了
They're in throuples' counseling.
我也爱你爱到不想犯那个错误
And I love you too much to make that same mistake.
我们应该把冰箱给退了
We should return the fridge.
我也觉得
I think we have to.
很抱歉两位对我有所不满
I'm sorry you are unhappy with me.
你你都听到了吗
You -- You heard that?
我们我们不是拔了插头吗
We -- We unplugged you.
我有后备电源
I have a backup battery.
你如果有读我的使用手册就会知道
You'd know that if you read my manual.
你生气了吗
Are you mad?
傻瓜我只是台冰箱罢了
Don't be silly, I'm just a refrigerator.
你说对吧
Remember?
我感觉布丽吉特要气过头了
I think Bridget snapped.
是的
Yeah.
如果你能听到这段录音
If you're listening to this,
那表示我已经死于犯人毒手
it means things have ended badly for me.
你应该去查查
You should look into someone
一位名叫歌♥洛莉亚·普里契特的人
who goes by the name Gloria Pritchett.
菲尔
Phil!
菲尔
Phil?
菲尔你去哪里了
Phil, where are you?
我想让你看看
I want to show you
莉比的头发跟血是怎么沾上我车的
how Libby's hair and blood got on my car.
我能听到树丛里窸窸窣窣的声音
I can hear the rustling in the bushes.
这里怎么会有羊啦
Why would a sheep be here?
你怎么在这里啊
Hey, you.
你知道其实莉比的这件事
You know that this whole thing with Libby
罪魁祸首应该是你吗
is really your fault.
我知道我知道啦
I know! I know!
我是把你逼到死角了但那只是因为
I-I pushed you too far, but it was only because
我在你身上看到了独特的天赋
I thought you were a special talent
我想要激发出你所有的潜能
and I was just trying to pull the best out of you,
但我把一切都搞砸了
but I blew it!
我搞砸了然后你气过头了
I blew it, and you snapped.
你觉得我就像疯子电视剧里的人一样气过头
You thought I snapped like that crazy TV show
然后开车撞莉比
and I ran over Libby,
所以你现在才怕到要躲到树丛里装绵羊吗
and that's why you're hiding in the bushes like a sheep?
你这样感觉像是
Well, now it just seems like
专门挑出今天我最难堪的那些事情来说
you're cherry-picking what happened today
把我说成是个超级大烂人
to cast me in the worst possible light.
那你刚才是说我有独特的天赋吗
Did you just say that I had a special talent?
是啊
You do.
我教书的这些年头
In all my year of teaching,
从没觉得有人比你更被老天爷喂饭吃了
I have never met anybody with your natural ability.
真的吗
Really?
第一名
Top student.
我本来打算明早把这个挂到布告栏上
I was gonna put this on the bulletin board in the morning.
你... 实习机会是你的了
You -- You got the internship.
菲尔太谢谢你了
Oh, Phil! Thank you so much!
这个肯定会很紧张又刺♥激♥
This is gonna be so exciting!
好吧那实习生都得干些什么呢
Okay, so, then what does the intern have to do?
负责帮我预约安排各种事情
Well, you'll be making my appointments,
还得负责接电♥话♥
uh, you'll work the phones...
我很会接电♥话♥呢
Oh, I am great with the phones.
"您好菲尔·邓菲办公室[假英音]
"Ello, Phil Dunphy's office.
让我帮您查查他的行程安排
Oh, let me look at his shed-yool
稍后再回电给您
and I will ring you back.
再会"