摩登家庭

Modern Family S11E11

Part 2 Feb. 29, 2020, 11:07 a.m.

u202dIt's a person that takes things that are supposed to be yours.
我就有个这样的对手
I have one of my own.
我那天就快完成第一次带人看♥房♥♥的工作了
I was closing a deal on my very first showing,
然后一个对手代理人俯冲而下
and a rival agent swooped in.
这房♥子真漂亮
What a lovely home.
不过或许有些不太适合孩子住
I mean, maybe not great for kids, you know?
等等什么我们就快生孩子了啊
Wait, what? But we're pregnant.
天啊抱歉我都没看到你们也在这里我...
Oh, my goodness. I'm sorry. I didn't even see you there. I was --
天啊
Oh, my.
那是加州恶毒黄蜂吗
Is that a California vulture wasp?
肯定是有山狮刚刚在这里捕杀过猎物
A mountain lion must've made a fresh kill.
于是那对夫妻同意晚些时候去她代理的房♥子里参观
So, the couple agreed to go to her open house later.
♪ 嘿你好苏我听说你被甩了 ♪
♪ Hey, there, Sue, I heard you got dumped ♪
♪ 现在你很忧郁 ♪
♪ And now you are blue ♪
♪ 那么我们一起参加毕业舞会怎么样 ♪
♪ So, how 'bout we go to the prom ♪
♪ 前提是我妈她同意 ♪
♪ If it's okay with my mom? ♪
我好庆幸曼尼现在不搞丢人的这套了
I am so glad that Manny stopped doing those embarrassing things.
拜托谁不喜欢看人放泡妞大招啊
Oh, come on. Who doesn't love a grand gesture?
当着我朋友的面干这种事罗纳德
In front of my friends, Ronald?!
我真不敢相信我以前会让你帮我做作业
I can't believe I ever let you do my homework!
天啊不不不要
My g-- Oh, gosh. Oh, no, no, Manny!
曼尼取消取消行动
Manny, abort, abort, abort.
取消行动
Abort! u202d
退后退后退后
Back up! Back up! Back, back, back, back!
-快跑快跑 -我在跑了
- Keep going! Keep going! - I'm going!
取消行动
Abort!
上周我留了一些狗床在这里
Last week, I left some dog beds here,
现在店家估计收到各种订购请求忙不过来了
so now the owners are probably getting swamped with requests.
那天我发现
The other day, I found out
乔把六个月的零花钱都存了下来
that Joe saved up six months of allowance
全部捐给了慈善组织
and donated it all to charity.
作为父亲这属于那种很罕见的时刻
It's one of those rare moments as a dad
就是你会觉得你很失败没把孩子教好
when you realize you've really dropped the ball.
那孩子需要学会做生意的基本原则
I mean, the kid needed to learn the basics of business.
能把那只狗狗买♥♥给我吗
Ooh, can I get that dog?
我可以做50个小时的家务
I'll do 50 hours of chores.
不 100小时也行
No, a hundred.
销♥售♥第一课
Sales lesson number one --
在谈判时永远不要显得太急迫
never look desperate in a negotiation.
别带感情想想你侄女莉莉
No emotion. Think of your cousin Lily.
我看到狗床卖♥♥了一些
Hey, I noticed the dog beds moved.
一定很受欢迎吧
They must be pretty popular, huh?
狗狗都不喜欢这些狗床
Um, the dogs didn't like them.
什么那些都是没人要的狗啊
What? These are dogs nobody wants.
它们是什么情况这么难伺候
I mean, what do they have going on?
别担心猫很喜欢这些狗床
Don't worry. The cats love them.
猫休想我要把这些狗床拿回家
Cats? Never. I'm taking them home.
猫住在菠萝里那根本说不通啊
I mean, cat in a pineapple? How does that even make sense?
或许是因为它们来自"喵威夷"
Maybe...they're from Meow-I?
听懂了吗夏威夷的梗
Get it? 'Cause Hawaii?
-上车去 -好的
- Get in the car. - u202dOkay.
这个雅达利游戏机有个大凹陷处
This Atari has quite a dent in it.
-你当年用它砸过我吧 -没有的事
- Didn't -- Didn't you throw it at me? - u202dNo.
那你解释下我头上的这个凹痕因为...
Then -- Then explain this groove in my head, 'cause...
你看严丝合缝能完美地拼合在一起
Yeah, I can -- I can fit them together like a puzzle.
米奇你这伤是梦游时摔下楼梯造成的
Mitchell, you fell down the stairs sleepwalking.
那是我们家族遗传性的老♥毛♥病了
It's established family history.
不肯承认错误
Unwilling to admit a mistake.
真"好奇"你是从哪学来的呢
Wonder where you picked that up from.
听着爸从不肯认错也快把我逼疯了
Look, it drives me nuts, too, that Dad never cops to his mistakes,
但每次都是我们和他各执一词
but it's always gonna be our word against his.
-是啊 -你怎么把这些汗衫的领口都剪开了
- Yeah. u202d- Why did you cut the necks out of all these sweatshirts?
我当年超迷《闪电舞》那部电影
Oh, I was a big "Flashdance" Fan.
你是怎么从霸凌的黄金年代活过来的
How you survived the golden age of bullying,
我永远无法理解
I will never understand.
等等等等
Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
我们面前就有一堆证据
We are sitting on a treasure trove of evidence
能够证明爸爸强行缩短了我们的假期好吗
than could prove Dad cut our vacation short, okay?
你知道我的本职工作就是
I mean, you realize that building cases
利用证据来对付社会上最恶劣的罪犯
against society's worst criminals is what I do.
针对那个在湖人队比赛现场外
How's that case against the deaf old lady
售卖♥♥培根卷热狗的老太太的案子怎么样了
who sells bacon-wrapped hot dogs outside Laker games going?
已经事先警告过她三次了
She was warned three times.
好吧我们要怎么证明爸爸强迫我们提早回来
Okay, how do we prove that Dad made us come home early?
我们去的那地方叫什么名字我都忘了
I mean, uh, what was that place we went even called?
等等我刚看到一个火柴盒
Hold on. I just saw a matchbook from there, and --
找到了在这呢就是这个
Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Here it is, here it is.
"汉德曼水上公园 25周年纪念"
"Handelman Waterpark. Celebrating 25 years."
我也可以来当回犯罪现场调查员
I can get on this CSI train.
那地方建造于1958年所以我们是1983年去的
Okay, "Founded in 1958," So that puts us there in '83.
83年 83年
'83, '83.
查找我83年的日记
Locating my diary from '83.
-好极了 -很好找到了
- Okay. - u202dAnd okay. Here it is.
4月20日 "我觉得JT喜欢我
April 20th. "I think JT likes me.
他嘲笑我头上的凹陷"
Makes fun of my head dent."
好吧所以度假肯定是在这之前
Alright, so it had to have been before that,
因为当时我们还没有那个游戏机
because we didn't have the video game yet,
所以那个凹...凹...
and that's what made the d-- the -- the --
我打断了你要说的话
I interrupted. u202d
所以我们是4月初去的
So, we were there early April,
没有那个时候的日记记录
and, uh, no diary entries from then.
好吧但这个或许有帮助
Okay. Okay. But maybe this might help.
瞧瞧这...
Look at...
这里找到了
Here -- Here it is.
"在汉德曼的第一天"
"Day One at Handelman."
好来吧
Okay, Here we go.
墨西哥流浪乐队都找来了
A mariachi band?
如果你想追到那个布兰达
If you want the Brenda girl,
装作不在意地和她说话
talk to her like you don't care,
-然后一周都别给她打电♥话♥ -怎么
- and then don't call her for a week. - Oh, oh, what?
让他把自己塑造成阴郁神秘的人
And present himself as some brooding mystery man
让她得努力博得他如父亲一般的认可吗
whose dad-like approval she has to work for?
哪个女人觉得那样有吸引力过啊
What woman has ever found that attractive?
我试试看
I'll try it.
太好了又是黛布拉
Oh, great. There's Debra again.
她八成在下面臭显摆
Probably down there flaunting
她用我的奖赢得的30美元代金券
her $30 gift card she got with my award.
-那是我的奖 -要出击了吗
- It's my award. - Is it go time?
你知道吗我这就下去
Yeah, you know what? Maybe I will.
我大步流星走到她面前
I'll just march right up to her,
用塔克的招牌盯人术鄙视她
and give her the classic Tucker stare down.
鄙视她这就是你的大计划
A dirty look. That's your big plan?
是的她会从我眼中看出
Yeah, she'll see in my eyes
我知道她都做了些什么
that I know exactly what she did,
相信我不管这商场里
and trust me, all the free sample
有多少免费香水试用
of perfume spritzes in this mall
都遮不住她身上内疚的酸臭味
won't be able to cover up the stench of guilt on her.
我刚刚的闲谈很愉快
Well, I just made a nice little connection.
不是和布兰达聊的她几乎没注意我
Not with Brenda, who barely noticed me,
是和罗纳德聊的他邀请我去熊猫快餐
but with Ronald, who invited me to Panda Express
一起化心碎为食欲
so we could eat our feelings.
曼尼
Manny?
我电♥话♥号♥码还没给你你就走了
Um, you took off before I could give you my number.
也把你的号♥码给我好吗
And maybe I could get yours, too?
-当然 -好
- Sure. - u202dYeah?
现在你的问题想要我的建议了吗
Do you need my advice with your problem now?
随便吧
Whatever.
你该一路往西开
See, you should point this thing west
来看看你的曾外孙们
and, uh, come meet your great-grandbabies.
开春了再去吧
Uh, this spring, I think.
我想让宝宝们重现有名的历史老照片