摩登家庭
Modern Family S11E09
Part 1
Feb. 29, 2020, 11:06 a.m.
各位 我快搞定座位安排了
Guys, I am nailing my seating chart.
能别把我排在卢克旁边吗
Can you not put me near Luke?
我受不了他嚼东西的声音
I can't with the chewing.
你就是个被宠坏的城市小孩
You are a spoiled city kid.
我小时候直到11岁才能跟人类坐一桌
I was 11 before I got to sit at the people table.
小卡 我都问你十次了
Cam. Cam, I've asked you 10 times.
你怎么还没给我发
Why haven't you sent me our itinerary
去你父母家的行程安排
for your trip to your parents' house?
最近有点忙
Been a little busy.
得了吧 你花了三小时制♥作♥电子贺卡
Okay, well, you spent three hours making a JibJab
内容是你 我还有莉莉上圣诞老人的电臀舞课
of you, me, and Lily dancing in Santa's Twerkshop.
瞧瞧我们的屁♥股♥啊
Look at our butts.
圣诞快乐
Merry Christmas!
-圣诞快乐啊 -大家好啊
- Merry Christmas. - Hello.
谁给我拿杯酒啊
So, who's going to get me a drink?
老娘不用再喂母乳了
Mama's done breast-feeding.
这对"奶宝"又属于我自己了
These babies are all mine again,
我准备把它们里面灌满酒
and I'm ready to fill 'em up with wine.
人体构造的原理不是这样的
Well, not how the human body works,
但我很为你开心
but I'm very happy for you.
-我怀念过去的海莉 -我也是
- I've missed Old Haley! - Me too.
话说 你能把我和宝宝跟海莉隔得远一点吗
Oh, hey, can you move Haley away from me and the twins?
我送她的礼物就是让她今晚摆脱当妈的职责 所以...
My present to her is the night off from Mommy duties, so...
好吧 我真希望你能早点跟我说
Okay, well, I would've appreciated a little heads-up,
但这是份贴心的礼物 所以...
but it's a thoughtful gift, so...
也是免费的 这是大好事
It's also free, which is helpful
因为我夏天时忘记银行卡密♥码♥了
because I forgot my ATM pin last summer.
我有没有对你提过我最爱的四个数字
Any chance I ever mentioned my four favorite numbers to you?
没有
No.
别 千万别把我和歌♥洛莉亚排在一起
Oh, no. Please move me away from Gloria.
会很尴尬的
It'll be weird.
歌♥洛莉亚最近在我爸手下工作
Gloria's been working for my dad.
他那么悉心地指导她 但是那天
He totally mentored her, and then the other day,
我却抓到她去我爸的竞争对手那里面试
I caught her interviewing with his competitors.
话说 如果我真加入你们
So, if I come on board,
我需要把发型改成跟你们一样的吗
do I have to change my hairstyle?
-可以商量这事 -这算是我们的特色风格
- We'll talk about it. - It's kind of our thing.
给你这个聪明人提个醒
u202dWord to the wise --
我就像是马修·麦康纳最近的五部电影
I'm like the last five Matthew McConaughey movies.
你从没看过我
You never saw me.
好吧
Fine.
圣诞快乐
Merry Christmas!
你们好啊
Hello.
圣诞餐桌就该这样才对嘛
Now, this is what a Christmas table should look like.
无意冒犯 亲爱的
u202dNo offense, honey.
我也喜欢你搞的"谁他妈在乎"风格的圣诞餐桌
I also love your whole "who cares" approach.
小卡
Cam?
我不能坐在爸爸旁边
I can't sit next to Dad.
我觉得他会叫我去他傻兮兮的狗窝公♥司♥工作
I think he's gonna ask me to work for his stupid dog bed company.
克莱尔
Claire!
怎么了
What?!
我不能在圣诞节让他心碎啊
I can't break his heart on Christmas.
你也知道节日会让他有爱又脆弱
You know how the holiday makes him so sweet and vulnerable.
我讨厌这傻♥逼♥围巾
I hate this damn scarf!
我看着跟女演员安杰丽卡·休斯顿一样
I look like Anjelica Huston!
是小卡买♥♥的 你给我戴着
Cam bought it! You wear it!
好爱这围巾哦 我感觉自己像个电影明星
Love the scarf! I feel like a movie star!
小卡 把我安排在克莱尔旁边好吗
Cam, put me next to Claire, okay?
我有事要跟她谈
I want to talk to her about something.
你终于来了
There she is!
我迫不及待要把礼物送给你了
I can't wait to give you your gift.
要现在打开吗 现在打开吧
Should we open it now? Let's open it now.
天啊 天啊
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
天啊 天啊
Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
我们拥有2020的远见[双眼视力为20/20]
你看懂了吗
You get it?
2020的远见
2020 vision.
是个双关啊
It works two ways.
你会出现在超多公交站长椅上
You are gonna be on so many bus benches.
但不是像以前你没嫁给杰时
And in a different way than when you had to go somewhere
出门都要等公交那种方式
before you married Jay.
天啊 爸 你对你的员工可真宠爱
Wow. Dad, that is a lovely gesture.
谢谢你 艾丽克斯
Thank you, Alex.
你总是知道什么该说 什么不该说
You always know what to say and what not to say.
菲尔 你太赞了
Phil, you're amazing.
我觉得这挺讽刺的
Which is ironic, I think,
因为你儿子可能是个反♥社♥会♥者
because your son might be a sociopath.
等等 这是怎么回事
Wait. W-What's all this, then?
你何不问问他呢
Why don't you ask him?
卢克 发生什么事了
Luke, what happened?
我来告诉你们发生了什么
I will tell you what happened.
他不但没有帮曼尼追回雪莉
Instead of helping Manny get Sherry back,
还将她抢为己有
he stole her for himself!
是真的 雪莉和我是一对了
It's true. Sherry and I are a thing.
-什么 -天啊 哇
- What?! -Oh, my God. Wow.
小卡 把曼尼划掉
Cam, take Manny off.
他不来了
He's not coming.
好了 大家随便坐吧
Okay, fine. Everybody just sit wherever they want,
就跟一帮流浪汉围着篝火乱坐一样
like a bunch of hobos around a barrel fire.
卢克 你怎么能做出这种事
Luke, how could you do this?
而且还是对曼尼下黑手
And to Manny, of all people?
我很内疚 但我跟雪莉的火花...
I feel bad, but this thing with Sherry is...
很特别
special.
这不是我平时的胡乱勾搭那种
This isn't my usual hit it and quit it.
-真"有魅力" -这话真刺耳
- Charming. - That's rough on the ears.
再说 雪莉根本不想跟曼尼在一起
Plus, Sherry doesn't want to be with Manny,
我们真的很来电
and we really connect.
我...
Well, I --
我觉得如果你真的那么在乎她...
I guess if you really care about her that much --
我是的
I do.
她聪明又很酷
She's smart and cool,
而且 她总是能逗我开心
and, man, does she make me laugh.
我懂
I get it.
没有比幽默的女人更性感的了
Nothing sexier than a funny woman.
或是井井有条的女人
Or an organized one.
你和小卡之间是怎么回事
So, what's up with you and Cam?
我察觉到紧张的氛围
I'm sensing tension.
我才没察觉到什么紧张的氛围
I didn't sense any tension.
我只是想听一些狗血八卦
I was just looking for some drama
我想着基佬门前多八卦是必然的
and figured it was a safe bet.
的确有点紧张的氛围
There is tension!
听着 首先
Okay, so, first of all,
他对于这顿晚餐有点过分关注
he's being extra crazy about this dinner.
但是你再听听这个
u202dBut now get this --
每年圣诞节 我都会抱怨
every Christmas, I complain about
要跟他一起回他老家 见他的家人
having to go home with him to -- to see his family,
但是今年 他说我不想去可以不用去
and this year, he said I don't have to go.
他对此完全没意见
And he was totally cool about it.
不妙 超级可疑
Oh, no. Super fishy.
所以你翻他的行李没有找到任何线索吗
So, you didn't find any clues when you went through his luggage?
我 没翻他的行李啊
I...didn't go through his luggage.
你简直像是希望你的婚姻破裂一样
It's like you want your marriage to fall apart.
跟我来
Come on.
我们要怎么解决卢克和曼尼之间的矛盾
What are we gonna do about Luke and Manny?
什么都不做
Nothing.
我最怕的就是争端升级 跟歌♥洛莉亚开启大战
The last thing I want is to get into a whole thing with Gloria.
亲爱的 有空吗
Hey, hon, got a minute?
最怕的是这个
Second to last.
抱歉 爸 我要去跟歌♥洛莉亚开启世界大战了
Sorry, Dad! I gotta get into a whole thing with Gloria.
没人可以开启任何大战
Or nobody gets into anything with anybody
我们要过个圆♥满♥的圣诞节
摩登家庭
Modern Family
剧集 | 摩登家庭 | 导航列表