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Modern Family S11E12
Part 2
Feb. 29, 2020, 11:07 a.m.
Ooh, what are the cameras for?
这是为一部纪录片准备的 要拍科技远见家
This is for a documentary about tech visionaries
回去感谢那些赋予他们灵感的人
going back to thank the people who inspired them.
伊隆·马斯克给他的数学老师买♥♥了一座岛
Elon Musk got his math teacher an island.
那我能得到什么
What am I getting?
假设那个人 是我
Assuming it's...me.
-摄像机在拍了吗 -是的
- Well, are the cameras rolling? - Yes.
我们曾经一直梦想一起做的事是什么
What is the one thing that we've always dreamed of doing together?
去纽约跟费莉希蒂一起上大学
Going to college in New York with Felicity?
不是
No.
这个家伙
This man right here,
教我要永远心怀远大的梦想
he taught me to always dream big
伸手摘星辰
and reach for the stars.
为了感谢你 菲尔
And as a thank-you, Phil,
你是否愿意让我成为地球上最幸福的男人
would you make me the happiest man on Earth
和我一起飞离地球
and leave Earth with me?
什么
W-W-What?!
我刚刚订了两张下一趟俄♥罗♥斯♥航♥班♥的票
I just got us two tickets on the next Russian flight
飞去国际空间站
to the International Space Station!
这是我遇到过的最意义非凡的事
This is the most amazing thing that's ever happened to me!
除了 当然
Except of -- of course,
非连续两次赢得年度最佳房♥地♥产♥经纪人奖
...winning two non-consecutive Realtor of the Year Awards.
我要哭了
I'm-I'm going to cry.
先别哭 抱歉 刚才收音出了问题
Uh, don't cry yet. I'm so sorry. We had a sound issue.
我们能全重拍一次吗
Can we do all that again?
好的 要从拥抱开始重拍吗
Yeah! Should we take it back to the hug?
我今天演出的票开始预定了
So, tickets for my show today are at will call.
好消息 我给你们预备了免费票
And good news -- I was able to get you comps.
我肯定会以其他方式付出代价
I'm sure it'll cost me in other ways.
是老爸发来的 "我马上就到"
It's from Dad. "I'm almost there."
假如"马上"是个地名 哈维尔肯定是市长
If "almost there" was a place, Javier would be the mayor.
请不要再无来由对他辱骂了
u202dPlease stop taking pot shots at his expense.
他这家伙 除了拿来骂也没别的作用了
Pot shots are the only thing that we can take at his expense.
我是认真的 妈 乔都被你的行为毒害了
I mean it, Mom. You've even poisoned Joe.
是被她的烹饪水平毒害了吧
You mean with her cooking?
我们只能嘲笑哈维尔
Hey, we're only making fun of Javier!
不行
No, we're not.
-向我保证 -好吧 我保证
- Promise me. - Okay, fine, I promise.
假如我毫无恶意的玩笑让你不舒服
If my good-natured ribbing is making you uncomfortable,
我会悬崖勒马的
I will refrain.
我给她买♥♥了每日一成语
I've got her on Word a Day cards.
我们看看能坚持多久
We'll see how long it holds.
歌♥洛莉亚
Hola, Gloria.
哈维尔
Oh, Javier, hi--
假牙不错
Nice teeth.
在牙医诊所装的还是钢琴店装的
Did you get them at the dentist or at the piano store?
自打上次摩♥门♥教♥徒上门传教后
I haven't seen anything so white and square
我还没见过如此又白又死性的东西
since the Mormons knocked on my door.
这些还只是我信手拈来的吐槽
And those were just off the top of my head,
但我向曼尼保证了 所以忍♥了
but I promised Manny, so -- Pbht!
见到你真高兴 快请进
Nice to see you. Come in.
-爸 -乖儿子
- Hey, Dad! - There's my boy!
某人用了我定制的古龙香水
Someone has been wearing my custom-made cologne --
哈维尔之香
Javier!
给想闻起来有点女人味的男人
For the man who wants to smell a little bit like a woman.
多谢你来看我的演出 爸
Thanks for coming to my show, Dad.
当然 我怎么会错过
Of course. I wouldn't miss it.
不过 我进城来还有其他理由
But, hey, that is not the only reason I am in town.
我有个提议
I, um... I have a proposition --
你好好咀嚼一下
something for you to chew on.
你不能替我们咀嚼吗
Couldn't you chew on it for us
毕竟你刚装了一口海狸一样的大牙
with your giant, new beaver mouth?
我为什么要做出那种傻承诺
I don't know why I made that stupid promise.
金句源源不绝
I am on fire!
我在高赌注牌局里拿到了同花顺
I was in a high-stakes poker game with a King-high Flush.
于是我押上了房♥子
So I bet my house.
不不不不
No, no, no, no, no.
你不能睡在曼尼的房♥间
You're not living in Manny's room.
我赢下了为期一年的环球航行
I won a year-long cruise around the world.
我希望你能伴我完成整个旅程
I want you to set sail with me for the entire voyage!
-什么 -绝对不行
- What?! - u202dAbsolutely not.
我该让百货公♥司♥的闺蜜
I should ask my gal at Nordstrom
为我准备几身航海行头
to pull some cruise looks for me.
看看他 急得牙痒痒
Look at him, he's chomping at the bit.
再这样金句要憋不住了
Stop setting me up!
给 老式咖啡
Here you go. A cup of joe, the old-fashioned way.
谢了 玛格丽特
Oh, thanks, Margaret.
老天 这里加了波本酒吗
Oh, God. I-Is there bourbon in this?
你跟我要咖啡的时候
When you asked for coffee,
不是给了我眼神示意吗
didn't you give me a "wink-wink"?
没有 这可是大早上
No. It's the morning.
所以酒里才加了咖啡
Well, that's why there's coffee in it.
请你帮我订个午餐好吗
Could you just make me a lunch reservation, please?
没问题
No problem.
那是什么
What's that thing?
这些餐厅都很棒 杰以前总去
Oh, these are all the great restaurants that Jay used to go to.
你喜欢黛安汁牛排吗
Do you like Steak Diane?
她选了十二家才选到有沙拉的餐厅
It took her 12 tries to find a place that had a salad.
你在做什么
Uh, w-what are you doing?
我刚把沙发铺好
Oh, I was just getting the couch ready
给你午后"开会"时用
for your afternoon "meeting."
你为什么说得好像我不是真要开会
Why are you saying "meeting" like it's not really a meeting?
跟你解释一下
Just so you know,
我的话都是字面意思 没有隐藏含义
when I say something, that's exactly what I mean.
另外 你在车上给我打电♥话♥时
Also, when you called me from your car,
我听不清你说什么
I couldn't really understand you.
你或许该重新弄一下蓝牙
You may want to fix your Bluetooth.
你注意到了
You noticed?
几年前牙神经死掉了
The nerve died a few years ago.
假如你看着碍眼 我可以拔掉
But if it bothers you, I'll have it yanked.
曼尼 你的戏讲的是什么
So, Manny, what is your show about?
戏里有海盗和唯美的裸戏吗
Will there be pirates and tasteful nudity?
跟我的上部戏不一样
It'll be different from my last one.
这次是独角戏
This is a one-man play
我会扮演咖啡馆里的四个角色
in which I portray four characters in a café
他们来自各行各业
from different walks of life.
当没有网络信♥号♥♥时
When the Internet goes out,
他们被迫和彼此聊天
they're forced to talk to each other.
我给戏取名为
I call it
《谁什么何时哪里为何无线网》
"Who, What, When, Where, Wi-Fi."
要是我就加个海盗
I'd throw in a pirate.
我该去进入角色了
I should go get into characters.
不准带曼尼去航行
Manny's not going on that trip.
我知道你说的冒险是什么意思
I know what an adventure with you means.
破酒吧 骗徒
Seedy bars, con men,
还有那种赠品笔 一转笔
souvenir pens that when you flip them,
上面的女人就会变成裸体
the lady's clothes come off.
假如我儿子想跟我共度时光
If my son wants to spend some time with me,
他应该有这个自♥由♥
he should be able to.
杰 帮我说两句
Jay...back me up.
他不会帮你说话的
He's not gonna back you up.
歌♥洛莉亚 让曼尼去航行吧
Gloria, let Manny go on the trip.
他不会有事的 他十岁起就像四十岁一样
He'll be fine. He's been 40 since he was 10.
而他四十年来都像十岁一样
And he's been 10 for 40 years.
没门
It's not happening.
我明白你担心什么
Look, I understand your concern,
但我想趁我还有时间 跟曼尼增进感情
but I want to bond with Manny before it's too late.
我可能进入了中年危机
I think I'm having a mid-life crisis.
你或许没注意到 但我做了牙贴面
You probably didn't notice, but I got veneers.
我还在纳闷你哪里不一样了
Oh, that's what that is!
拜托不要死在我们房♥子里
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