牧场趣事（2016）

The Ranch S02E19

Part 2 June 24, 2021, 11:39 a.m.

我们应该
Well, what we should do is
告诉他周六就要开始轰炸朝鲜了
tell him we're gonna start bombin' North Korea on Saturday.
给他活下去的动力
Give him something to live for.
进来
Come in.
怎么了珍工程师
Ooh. What's going on there, Engineer Jen?
不用这么称呼我
You know you don't have to call me that.
不必非得管毒虫兰迪叫"毒虫兰迪"
Yeah, we don't have to call Meth-Head Randy "Meth-Head Randy,"
但弄清楚说的是哪个兰迪也好
but it helps to know which Randy you're talking about.
嘿
Hey...
笨蛋柯尔特你不走吗
Dipshit Colt. Why don't you get outta here, huh?
回头见珍工程师
Uh, see ya, Engineer Jen.
疱疹公鸡
Herpes Rooster.
没想到你今晚会来怎么了
So, I didn't expect to see you again tonight. What's going down?
有间仓库的警报响了
Uh, an alarm went off in one of our storage sheds over here.
我来看看
I came over to check it out.
你们看到什么了吗
Did you happen to see anything?
慢着每次偷锯都会有靓妞来吗
Wait a sec. So every time I steal a saw, a hot chick appears?
对乡巴佬来说这法力也太大了吧
That is too much power for one redneck.
你明知道仓库装了监控的
You know that shed has cameras.
现在没了
Not no more, it don't.
挖掘机可以停在你家地界上吗
Is it all right if my guys park a backhoe on your property?
当然可以你或许该把钥匙留给我
Yeah, sure. You're probably gonna wanna leave me the keys,
以防有人
you know, in case they gotta...
不许玩挖掘机
You can't play with the backhoe.
好吧扫兴的珍
All right, fine, Buzzkill Jen.
抱歉
Sorry.
我今晚不太顺
I just had a shitty night.
之前我回到宾馆
I went back to my hotel,
大厅里有个红酒奶酪趴
where they were having a wine and cheese party in the lobby
可只有夏布利酒
and all they had was Chablis.
趁没人看到我偷了所有的奶酪
When no one was looking, I stole all their cheese.
要曼彻格奶酪吗
Manchego?
小袋的不错
Oh. Pocket cheese. Nice.
你今天过得如何
How was your day?
挺糟的我老爸心脏病犯了 - 天啊
Pretty shitty. My dad had a heart attack. - Oh, my God.
我很遗憾他没事吧
I'm so sorry. Is he okay?
没事
I guess.
但感觉很怪
It's weird though, you know?
我一直觉得他是无敌的
I've always seen my dad as invincible.
有次他
You know, one time, he...
用射钉枪误射了自己的脚
shot himself in the foot with a nail gun,
他就用垛板机把钉子拔了出来
pulled the nail out with the pliers
用强力胶把钉眼堵上了
and then filled the hole with superglue.
那晚去打保龄球居然还打了217分
Went bowling that night. Rolled a 217.
我爸也一样
My dad was the same way.
要不是因为心脏病过世了
I think he would have gotten along with your dad
他应该能跟你♥爸♥处得不错
if he hadn't died of a heart attack...
知道吗你可真够怪的
You're, like, varsity-level awkward, you know that?
我不知道自己是不是
I don't... I don't know if I'm, like...
只是有时候我可能有点
Yeah, it's just, sometimes, I can get a little... It's...
是啊
Yeah.
你来我很高兴要喝酒吗
Well, I'm glad you're here. You want another drink?
我不知道
I don't know.
我最近可能喝得太多了
I think maybe I've been drinking too much lately.
宾馆客房♥的保洁员似乎有点担心我
The housekeeper at the hotel seems worried about me.
她不往房♥间里的酒台补酒了
She stopped restocking the mini-bar,
还总把<圣经>放在我的床上
and she keeps leaving the Bible on my bed.
好吧也许就喝一杯
Yeah, maybe one drink.
天啊你独自一人在一个小房♥间里
Man, you sit all alone in a little, tiny room
每天喝到睡觉
drinking yourself to sleep every night?
还真挺可悲的
That's pretty fuckin' lame.
嘿
Hey! Jeez. Whoa!
你在这儿干什么呢
What the hell are you doing out here?
我前面路过你房♥间听见你咳嗽
Oh, I was, uh, walking by your room, and I heard you coughing.
所以进来看看
So I went in to check on you,
接着想到要是你醒来看到我
then I thought if you woke up and saw me standing there,
可能会发心脏病
you might have a heart attack.
于是我就来了这儿
So then I came out here,
结果差点被你吓出心脏病
and then you almost gave me a heart attack.
挺难相信的吧
Now that's pretty crazy, right?
你在笑吗是
Are you laughing? It's...
没有
Nope.
地上怎么有个包
Why in the hell is there a bag laying on the floor?
这其实是给你的
Actually, uh, it's for you.
是个睡袋
It's an overnight bag.
大章克申那儿开了家户外用品店
Uh, they're opening up a Bass Pro Shop in Grand Junction.
我原本要带你去的
So I was gonna take you.
你信吗
You buyin' that?
不信
Nope.
吃点早饭我们要开工了 - 不行
Get some breakfast. We're going to work. - No.
老爸你跟我来
Dad, you're coming with me.
不许说"不"
I ain't taking "No" for an answer.
好啊那这样呢
That's fair. How about this?
没门儿
Not a fuckin' chance.
老爸
Dad...
我是想帮你
I'm trying to help you.
你不想活了吗
Don't you wanna live?
我想让你别来烦我了
What I want is for you to get off my fuckin' back!
跟你说了我没事 - 好吧
I told you I'm fine. - Okay.
别管闲事了
Now just fucking leave it alone!
冷静
Okay. Just take it easy, all right?
我很抱歉
Look, I'm sorry.
那这样呢
Uh, how 'bout this?
今天这里的事交给我和公鸡你呢
Rooster and I will handle everything here today and you...
不能着急上火
Well, the important thing for you is just to not stress.
到底要哪样
Well, which is it?
是把事情交给你们还是让我别着急上火
Do you want to handle it or do you want me not to stress?
老爸
Dad...
没什么好争的好吗
This isn't up for debate, okay?
你要是不去医院就不能干活
If you're not gonna go to the hospital, you're not going to work.
是这样吗
Is that so?
是的就是这样
Yeah, that's so.
你要做的就是坐下
What you're gonna do is, you're gonna sit down,
我给你放<兄弟连> 看
and I'm gonna put on Band of Brothers,
而你就坐着看十个小时
and you're gonna spend ten hours sitting on your ass,
看着纳粹被消灭你会喜欢的
watching Nazis die, and you're gonna fuckin' like it.
拜托
Please.
好吧从第二集开始放
Okay. Start with the second episode.
我喜欢看诺曼底登陆那里
I like it when they get to Normandy.
来吧太好了
Come on. Good. Good.
好的嘿我如果你要找我
All right. Hey, I, uh... If you wanna reach me,
方便起见
to make it easier,
我在你手♥机♥里叫"笨蛋"
I put my number in your phone under "Shithead."
我手♥机♥里已经有你的号♥码了
I already got you in there...
名叫"蠢蛋"
under "Dipshit."
还想骗我
That's a good one. Yeah.
还真是
Oh, there I am.
搞什么
What the hell?
不是吧公鸡
Really, Rooster?
是的
Yep.
在沃尔玛一元区买♥♥的
I found that thing in the dollar bin at Walmart.
你信吗 - 是的我信
Do you believe that? - Yes. Yes, I do.
谢谢你让我睡这儿
Thanks for letting me crash here.
我昨晚喝得太多了
I drank way too much last night.
我们开着挖掘机去买♥♥汉堡了吗
Did we ride a backhoe to Jack in the Box?
不用担心
Don't worry about it.
我只记得大喊
I just remember yelling...
"把薯条放铲斗里"
"Put the fries in the bucket!"
知道吗柯尔特上次睡这儿时
You know, when Colt passes out here,
他是在外面地里的沙发上醒来的
he wakes up on that couch in the middle of the field.