牧场趣事（2016）

The Ranch S02E10

Part 3 June 24, 2021, 11:37 a.m.

这只是我遇事不顺时
Yeah, I don't know. That's just my go-to move
摆个姿态而已
when something goes wrong.
我想
Guess, uh...
到最后这也许是好事
Guess, in the end, it's probably a good thing, huh?
好事
Good thing?
现在你要留在这里了
Yeah. Like you said, now you're gonna be around.
你说真的
Seriously?
所以我跟你说我对未来的打算落空了
So, I just tell you that all my plans for the future fell apart,
而你却说 "这是好事"
and all you have to say is, "It's a good thing"?
你真要这么自私吗
Are you really that selfish?
我自私
I'm selfish?
你才是要为了一个叫克林特的家伙
You're the one that's
弃家人而去的人
leaving the family for some guy named Clint.
他又不姓伊斯特伍德
Ain't even Eastwood.
知道吗柯尔特我不说了
You know what, Colt? I'm done.
你就这么走了吗
Oh, oh, that's... You're just gonna walk away?
好啊
Fine.
你想听我说完
Do you wanna have this conversation?
我把一生都献给了这个家
I've devoted my entire life to this family.
而且这期间我失去了自我
And somewhere along the line, I just became invisible.
我是博的妻子你们的妈妈汉克的酒保
I'm Beau's wife, or your mother, or Hank's bartender.
但不是我自己
I just stopped being Maggie.
我有很多想做但没机会去做的事
And I got a whole list of things that Maggie never got to do.
比如去巴黎学画画
You know, go to Paris, learn to paint,
上<猜价>节目亲鲍勃巴克
go on The Price Is Right and kiss Bob Barker.
最后这条已经没指望了
And that's already gone!
所以要是我想去新墨西哥州你们会觉得我自私
So if it makes me selfish to wanna go to New Mexico,
甚至都不是去墨西哥柯尔特
not even Mexico, Colt,
是新墨西哥州那我就自私一回了
New Mexico, then I'm fucking selfish.
嘿柯尔特
Hey, Colt.
嘿两位
Oh. Hey, guys.
我刚看到那个不错的摆设
Hey, man. I just saw that sweet display where they put the, uh,
有人用百威和百威淡啤的空罐摆出了美国国旗
Bud and the Bud Light cans and made it into the American flag.
是你摆的吗
Did you make that?
我倒希望是了
I wish.
我之前想把卫生纸摆成金字塔结果搞砸了
I had a little problem with the Charmin pyramid.
现在他们不让我摆任何高过腰部的东西
Now they won't let me stack anything higher than my waist.
没事
That's cool.
记得你以前打职业橄榄球的时候吗
Hey, uh, remember when you used to be a pro football player?
你想干嘛 - 我就是来
What do you want? - Well, I just came here
买♥♥箱啤酒顺便嘲笑你一番所以一个目标达成了
to get a case of beer and make fun of you, so one down.
我是来买♥♥狗粮的
I'm just here for dog food.
狗粮在7号♥过道
Dog food's on aisle seven.
是6号♥过道
No, it's on six.
老爸我在这里上班
Dad, I work here.
才两天我来这儿买♥♥东西都30年了
For two days. I've been coming here for 30 years.
狗粮在6号♥过道剃须刀在8号♥过道
Dog food's on six, razors are on eight...
而且快速收银通道
and ten items or less seems to
不过是个摆设
be more of a suggestion than a hard-and-fast rule.
天啊
Oh, man...
今天真累
what a fucking day.
这里不允许喝酒
Dude, you can't drink beer in here.
这一点经理说得很明白
All right, my manager made that very clear.
我不是要喝就尝尝
I'm not drinking it, just sampling it.
否则我怎么知道喜不喜欢
How else am I supposed to know if I like it?
你会给我惹麻烦的
You're gonna get me in trouble.
真的假的
You serious?
我们有次在这儿吃了一整只烤鸡
We ate an entire rotisserie chicken in here one time.
那次生日过得很开心
That was a pretty good birthday.
在老妈没卖♥♥掉酒吧前
Hey, you wanna swing by the bar
明晚过去喝几杯如何
and grab drinks tomorrow night while it's still free?
不行为了送海瑟去看医生
I can't. I already had to blow off Abby
我已经不得不放艾比鸽子了
to take Heather to the doctor.
而且你还有的是机会去蹭酒喝
Plus, you're gonna get plenty more chances.
给酒吧的报价作废了
That offer on the bar fell through.
老妈打算怎么办
What's Mom gonna do?
我想还要在这里多待一阵子吧
I don't know, stick around here for a while, I guess.
我之前想跟她聊聊可她只会对我发脾气
I tried to talk to her. All she did was yell at me.
该死这个我没收了
Fuck it. I'm confiscating this.
可真是的
Man, oh, man.
老妈的日子更不好过了
Things get any tougher for Mom, you know?
酒吧卖♥♥不出去
She can't sell her bar
儿子现在还在西夫韦摆货架
and now her son is stocking shelves at the Safeway.
要是你不想看着像贵宾犬一样
You know, the hair straighteners are on aisle eight
就去8号♥过道买♥♥个直发器
if you're sick of looking like a fucking poodle.
这句给力
That was a good one.
不小心的
Oops.
你吓死我了
You scared the shit out of me!
你在沙发上干什么
What the hell are you doing on the couch?
我想在你回家前别睡过去
I was trying to stay up until you got home.
真贴心
Aw, that's sweet.
我还给你做了千层面
I even cooked you a lasagna,
可我睡着了面糊了
but I fell asleep and it burned.
家里的烟雾报♥警♥器都不好使
Do you know none of the smoke alarms work in this house?
是的我爸说
Oh, yeah, my dad claims
他能比那些东西先察觉到烟雾
he can detect the smoke before they can.
可烤糊了的千层面证明
Well, there is a black brick of lasagna in the trash
事实并非如此
that says he can't.
我们接下来的生活就是这样的吗
Is this gonna be the rest of our lives?
我才刚干这份工作
I just started this job and
我们俩就像两坨永远见不着的屎了
we're already like two shits passing in the night.
你刚才说"两坨屎"吗应该是
Did you just say, "Two shits"? It's two...
知道吗我们的确是
You know what? Yes, we are.
没事还有周五呢
But hey, we've got Friday.
对 - 是啊
Yeah. - Yeah...
周五
Friday.
说到这个
About that.
怎么了
What?
我答应海瑟周五送她去看医生
I promised Heather I'd take her to the doctor on Friday.
不是吧那我们说好的事呢 - 抱歉我知道
Seriously? What about our plans? - Sorry. I know, but...
我还在声破天上列好了性♥爱♥歌♥单
I made a sex playlist on Spotify.
我只是
I just...
是她问我的
She asked...
说这次能知道
And then she said we're supposed to find out
孩子是男是女
whether or not it's a boy or girl.
但愿是男孩
You know, hopefully it's a boy.
但总之但愿是男孩
But either way, you know, boy.
你当然应该去
Well, of course you should go.
只是 - 你生气了吗
It's just... - Are you mad?
没有我
No, I'm...
就是失望 - 这更糟
disappointed. - Aw, that's even worse!
没关系我只是想跟你在一起仅此而已
It's fine, okay. I wanted to hang out with you, that's all.
抱歉 - 可不行随便了
I'm sorry. - But we can't. So whatever.
上♥床♥睡觉吧我们俩都累了
We'll just go to bed. We're both tired.
抱歉
I'm sorry.
没事这个明早再说
Nah, it's fine. We'll talk about it in the morning.
我闻到的是烟味吗
Do I smell smoke?
嘿老妈能谈谈吗
Hey, Ma, can I talk to you?
改天行吗今天我已经够累了
Oh. Can it wait? It's been a really long day.
我只想赶紧忙完
I just want to finish up,
抽根大♥麻♥ 吃一整盘布朗尼
smoke a joint, eat a whole pan of brownies.
吃大♥麻♥布朗尼
You know, you could save some time,
能给你省点时间
you combine those last two things.
那可就危险了
Well, that's a dangerous game.
因为你越嗨布朗尼就吃得越多
'Cause the higher you get, the more brownies you want,
还没等清醒过来
and before you know it,
你就会买♥♥只水牛摆进酒吧
you're buying a fucking buffalo to put in your bar.
什么事
So, what's up?
我去西夫韦看了看柯尔特
Oh, so, uh, I went over to see Colt at Safeway,
主要是想看看他穿围裙什么样
you know, mostly 'cause I wanted to see him in an apron.