牧场趣事（2016）

The Ranch S02E18

Part 3 June 24, 2021, 11:39 a.m.

但你俩还挺好的
but you guys are in good shape.
或许你该把头放那条河里浸一下
Maybe you should dip your head in that river, Bill.
怎么了开玩笑而已
What? I'm kidding.
还有彼得森给你们的条件也很优厚
Plus, you're getting a great deal from Peterson.
所以即便你们资金有点吃紧
So even though you guys are gonna be stretching a little thin,
我也会批准你们贷款的
I'm gonna go ahead and approve the loan.
真的吗
Are you serious?
"我会批准你们贷款的"
"I'm gonna go ahead and approve the loan."
这是继那次
That's the best sentence I've heard since,
"测醉器坏了路上注意安全"之后我听过最好的话
"The Breathalyzer's busted. Get home safe."
那我们看一下具体条款
So, uh, let's go over the terms.
这是你们要支付的首♥付♥款金额
Uh, here is how much you guys are gonna be putting down...
好的 - 这是你们的月供金额
Yep. - Oh, and here is your monthly payment.
好的这些数字是什么
Okay. Yeah. What's, uh... what's all these numbers down here?
是签约费用
Oh. Uh, it's closing costs.
贷款费用评估费用产权保险
Uh, loan fees, appraisal fees, title insurance...
我们不需要这些
Oh. Yeah, we don't need those.
这些是不能协商的
Oh, well, these aren't negotiable.
这可不是
It's not like
我跟第一任妻子离婚时要我出钱给她隆胸那么简单
when my first wife asked me to pay for her boob job as a part of our divorce.
是这么回事
Yeah, well. Here's the thing, Bill.
这可是额外一大笔钱
This is a lot of extra cash, you know?
我们把所有拿得出来的都付首♥付♥了
Yeah, we're putting everything we got into that down payment.
那我就不知道该怎么说了
Oh, well. I don't know what to say.
如果你们无法
I mean, if you guys can't
支付这些费用
come up with the money to pay these fees,
我们就不能给你们贷款
we can't move forward with the loan.
嘿 - 嘿
Hey. - Hey.
你在这儿干什么呢
What are you doing up here?
想跳下去 - 噢
Just thinking about jumping. - Oh.
记住把我的骨灰倒进
Remember, I want my ashes sprinkled
汤姆布拉迪喝的蛋白质奶昔里
into a protein shake that Tom Brady drinks,
这样我就终于能赢一次超级碗了
so I can finally win a Super Bowl.
我知道你之前的指示已经很详尽了
I know. You left me very detailed instructions.
要是还有剩下的就倒进
And if there's anything left, the rest goes in the milk
印第500赛事的牛奶里 - 印第500赛事
at the Indy 500. - Indy 500.
你怎么找到我的 - 公鸡告诉我的
How did you find me? - Oh, Rooster told me.
他还告诉了我比尔那边的事
He also told me what happened with Bill.
我很遗憾
I'm sorry.
是啊
Yep.
我终于去设想
You know, I finally let myself think
这些以后都会是我们的了
that all of this was gonna be ours.
我都忘了这里有多美
I forgot how beautiful it is.
记得以前彼得森家那辆闹鬼
God, you remember when Mr. Peterson had that haunted
我们还在下面亲热过的干草车吗
hayride and we made out underneath the hay?
我们没有
No, we didn't.
那是只鹰吗
Is that an eagle?
我好难过艾比
This kills me, Ab.
就只差那么一点
It's, like, I came so close...
而现在我要放弃这个梦想了
and now I gotta give up on the dream.
这个嘛
Well...
也许不用
Maybe not.
也许不用
Here.
是什么
What's that?
是我为婚礼攒的钱
It's money I put aside for the wedding.
你可以拿去完成签约 - 不行
You can use it to close the deal. - No. No way.
为什么不行
Why not?
因为该由我来养家
Because... I'm supposed to be the one providing.
这才是买♥♥下牧场的意义所在
That's the whole point of getting this ranch.
要是没法给你一场像样的婚礼一个家
If I can't give you a nice wedding and a home,
我还算什么男人
what kind of man am I?
我不会用你的钱的
I'm not taking your money.
现在不是20世纪50年代我们一起面对
This is not the 1950s. We're in this together.
相濡以沫
We provide for each other.
这笔钱该用在
This money is supposed to
能让我们快乐的地方
be used for something that makes us happy.
用它来买♥♥那座牧场
And buying this ranch
比租个大帐篷请支乐队
would make me much happier than paying for a huge tent and a band
好让公鸡能用一次性相机拍他的蛋蛋更让我开心
just so Rooster can fill up all the disposable cameras with pictures of his balls.
艾比 - 这事没得商量
Abby... - It's not up for debate.
你确定 - 是的
You sure? - Yes.
谢谢
Thank you.
那么我们真要买♥♥牧场了吗
So, are we doing this?
是的真要买♥♥
Yeah. We're doing this.
太他妈棒了
Fuck yeah!
我带了香槟来庆祝 - 什么
Oh, I brought champagne to celebrate. - What?
是美乐海里夫啤酒 - 啤酒中的香槟
Miller High Life. - The champagne of beers!
你还真了解我
You know me so well.
我爱你
I love you.
我爱你
I love you.
行了要在树上来一炮吗?
All right. Are we gonna have sex in a tree?
不要留到去米尔伍德公园再做
No. We'll save our sex-in-a-tree days to Millwood Park.
什么这也跟我无关
What... Again, not me.
搞什么
What the fuck?
老爸有时间
Hey, Dad, you got a minute to...
妈呀你居然在喝葡萄酒
Holy shit, you drinking wine?
你们两个笨蛋把啤酒都喝光了
You idiots drank all the beer.
什么不会我昨天才买♥♥了一箱百威
What? No. I just bought a case of Bud yesterday.
你喜欢葡萄酒
You like wine!
是乔安妮买♥♥的
Joanne bought it.
就快搁坏了
And it's going bad.
还有知道吗新规矩
And you know what? New rule.
过了30岁而且没跟父母一起住
If you're over 30 and don't live with your parents,
你可以想喝什么就喝什么
you can drink whatever the fuck you want.
知道吗
Hey, you know what?
这太棒了我们有事跟你谈
This is perfect. We got to talk to you about something.
不如你坐下把<欲望与都市>关了
Why don't you sit down, turn off the Sex and the City,
好好品你的霞多丽酒
and enjoy your chardonnay.
是白索维酒笨蛋
It's sauvignon blanc, asshole.
坐吧
Sit down.
行了是这样的
All right. Here's the scoop.
我们之前说过这事
We were talking about it.
我们想买♥♥彼得森家的牧场
We want to buy Peterson's ranch.
又来
Not this again.
要我拒绝几次才行
How many times do I have to say no?
就像那次讨论买♥♥披萨烤箱的事一样
It's like the goddamn pizza oven all over again.
要是有块上好的白披萨
Look, you wouldn't be saying that if you had a nice white pizza
来配你的白索维酒你就不会这么说了
to pair with your sauvignon blanc.
听好了上次谈过之后事情有了点变化
Now, listen. Things have changed since we talked about this last.
昨天我们跟银行的比尔见了面
Yesterday, we met with Bill from down at the bank.
他说我们可以贷款
He says we can make a deal.
只要我们付了首♥付♥
All we got to do is come up with the down payment,
他就会批准贷款
he'll give us the loan.
是啊如果能早点儿治好小儿麻痹
Yeah, and if they'd have cured polio faster,
你们卡尔叔叔就不会一脚大一脚小了
your Uncle Carl wouldn't have two different sized shoes.
我们没钱
We don't have the money.
老爸我把能拿出来的都拿出来了
Dad, I'm putting in every penny I got.
艾比把办婚礼的钱也拿出来了
And Abby threw in the money from the wedding.
剩下的可以用
So, with the rest we can bridge it
银行户头里现有的钱
with the money we got in the account,
等油气管道的钱一到账银行户头里的钱就补上了
and then soon as the pipeline money comes in, we'll replace it.
开什么玩笑
Are you kidding me?
户头里的钱要坚持到把牛卖♥♥出去
That account has to last until we get the calves to market.
不老爸你听到珍工程师说的话了
No, Dad. You heard Engineer Jen.
她说那笔钱一两个星期就能到账
She said the money's gonna be here in a week or two, okay?
可彼得森牧场等不到那时候这是肯定的
The Peterson ranch won't be. It's a slam dunk.
就跟上次买♥♥披萨烤炉一样
Just like that pizza oven would have been.
要是当时买♥♥了我们就再也不用叫多米诺披萨了
Never would've had to order Domino's again.
老爸这是我们买♥♥下
Dad, this is our chance
隔壁跟咱家怼着的那块地的机会
to get the land that butts right up next to ours