牧场趣事（2016）
The Ranch
第二季
剧集 | 牧场趣事（2016） | 导航列表
牧场趣事（2016）
The Ranch S02E07
Part 1
June 24, 2021, 11:37 a.m.
嘿
Okay!
给你弄了些吃的和三明治 - 好
Got you some snacks and sandwiches. - Okay.
我给艾比准备了瓶香槟
Got a bottle of champagne for Abby from me
还有供你车尾派对的六瓶啤酒
and a six-pack for tailgating.
没路上喝的啤酒吗
What, no beer for the road?
开个玩笑
I'm kidding.
出城时我会去烟酒店里买♥♥点
I'll grab some from the liquor store on the way out of town.
暴风雪就要来了
You know there's a snowstorm coming.
别担心 我会开得飞快
Oh, don't worry, I'm gonna drive real fast.
我是不是刚刚创建了雪地纳斯卡车赛
Did I just invent NASCAR in the snow?
你要去哪儿
Where you heading?
给艾比来次生日惊喜之旅
Oh, taking Abby on a little surprise trip for her birthday.
想知道惊喜是什么吗
Don't you wanna know what the surprise is?
说实话 我后悔问了第一个问题
Honestly, I regret asking the first question.
她就像枫糖培根 够甜但也够劲儿
She's like maple bacon. Sweet but salty.
嘿 老妈 - 嘿 亲爱的
Hey, Ma! - Hey, honey!
嘿 给我几瓶啤酒行吗
Hey, can I get a couple beers?
当然了 宝贝 - 嘿
Sure, sweetie. - Hey!
别紧张 反正都过期了
Oh, relax, they're expired anyway.
工作怎么样 活儿都干完了 开心吗
How'd it go at work? Glad you got all that work done?
是的 进展还算顺利
Yeah, it went fine.
很高兴我帮上忙了
I'm happy I could help.
不必谢我 威格牛仔裤我穿32到34码
You don't have to thank me. I'm a 32", 34" in Wranglers.
尺码告诉你了 该干什么就干什么吧
You just do with that information what you will.
去你的 克林特 - 冷静一下
Fuck you, Clint! - Okay, let's just calm down.
少叫我冷静
Don't tell me to calm down!
妈的 碰上沃尔玛分手事件了
Oh, shit, we got a Walmart breakup.
你在说什么
What are you talking about?
是白人垃圾夫妇
Oh, it's a drinking game
在公众场合吵架时的喝酒比赛
for when white trash couples fight in public.
女的要是开口大骂就喝一口 要是动手扇耳光就喝两口
One drink if she cusses, two if she slaps him.
要是往男的脸上泼喝的
And you gotta chug your
就一口喝光
whole beer if she throws a drink in his face.
真高兴你们有这么新奇有创意的喝酒方法
I'm so glad you guys are finding new and creative ways to drink.
我们可是发明家 老妈
We're innovators, Ma.
你净瞎说
You're bullshit.
行了 我得走了
All right, I gotta go.
什么 我们刚要干点蠢事
What? We're just getting ready to do something real stupid.
抱歉 有人约炮 我会告诉艾比你说"你好"
Sorry, dude, booty call. I'll tell Abby you say "What up?"
我受够这样了 还有你
I'm done with this! And you.
该死 她要泼喝的了
Oh, shit, she gonna throw the drink.
游戏规则是
No, Hank, the game is
要是她往男的脸上泼才一口喝光
you only chug if she throws a drink in his face.
什么游戏
What game?
嘿 艾德 - 嘿 公鸡
Hey, Ed. - Hey, Rooster.
我之前想着可以在酒吧里见 这样我就能喝瓶啤酒了
I was hoping we could meet inside so I could grab a beer.
早就想到了 朋友 - 谢谢
Way ahead of you, amigo. - Oh, thank you.
听着 谢谢你来见我
Look, I appreciate you meeting me.
我想你已经听说我被开了 是吗 - 是的
I assume you heard I got fired, yeah? - Yeah.
听着 艾德 我需要你帮忙 行吗
Look, Ed... I need your help, all right?
你能给诺依曼山牧场打电♥话♥
Any way you can call Neumann's Hill
帮我讨回工作吗
and try and get me my job back?
听着 我什么都愿意做 好吗
Look, man, I'll do anything, okay?
我甚至愿意去参加那个会议
I'll even go to that meeting, you know, with the...
就是大胸火♥辣♥女主持的那个
with the... The one led by the hot chick with the... with the big rack.
性骚扰研讨会吗
The sexual harassment seminar?
对 就是那个
Yeah, man, that one!
公鸡 我很想帮你 可我帮不了
Rooster, I'd love to help you, but I can't.
可当时是你雇佣我的
But you're the one who hired me there.
显然 他们会听你的
I mean, they're obviously gonna listen to you.
公鸡 你之前想把脱衣舞吧消费的钱报公账
Rooster, you tried to expense a night at a strip club.
那是团队建设活动
That was a team-building exercise!
你知道我觉得你很出色
Rooster, you know I think the world of you,
但我无能为力
but there's nothing I can do.
好吧 我理解
All right, I understand.
你会时来运转的
You'll land on your feet.
是的 我会的 好的 谢谢 艾德
Yes, I will. All right. Thanks, Ed.
我需要这些
I'm gonna need these.
嘿 博 - 嘿 乔安妮
Hey, Beau. - Hey, Joanne.
你好吗
How are you?
挺好的 见到你真好 你怎么来了
Good. It's good to see you. What brings you by?
我从机场回家
Well, I'm on my way back from the airport
顺路把望远镜还给你
and I thought I'd bring back your binoculars
因为我知道它就像你的三儿子
'cause I know they're like a third son to you.
三儿子
Third?
要是房♥子起火了 我只会把它带出来
If the house was on fire, this is the son I'd carry out.
你的迪士尼游轮行如何 - 棒极了
How was your Disney cruise? - Oh, it was great.
游轮上有水滑梯和五个泳池
They have a waterslide and five pools.
每晚都给你安排一个新座位
And every night, they seat you at a different table
好认识些新人
so you get to meet all kinds of new people.
而你这次乐趣之旅的最终奖励
And your reward at the end of this rainbow of fun
居然是在墨西哥被丢下船
is being dropped off in Mexico?
还给你带了份小礼物
And... brought you a little gift.
上面有"爱生气"的米奇耳朵
Mickey Mouse ears with "Grumpy" On it!
爱生气 我不明白
Grumpy? I don't get it.
我想给柯尔特也做一个
I tried to get them to make me one for Colt,
可他们不给做上面带"傻帽"的
but they wouldn't put "Shithead" on it.
嘿 暴风雪就快来了
Hey, the storm's settling in.
欢迎你进来喝一杯 直到暴风雪停
You're welcome to come in for a drink till it lets up.
要是我进来 我就会跟你聊天
If I come in, I'm gonna talk to you.
没关系
That's fine.
我洗耳恭听
I'm all ears.
还有很远吗 开始下大雪了
Is it much further? 'Cause it's really starting to come down.
我们不会有事的
Yeah, we'll be fine.
车是四驱的 还上了雪链
We have four-wheel drive, tire chains...
有一个座位的安全带能用
one of our seat belts works.
我带了行李
Well, I packed a bag
所以但愿我们住的是旅馆
so hopefully, we're staying at a hotel somewhere.
我可没说是旅馆
I didn't say it was a hotel.
最好是
Well, it fucking better be!
最好是
Well, it fucking better is!
天啊
Oh, my God.
是阿斯彭的那家新温泉旅馆吗
Wait, is it that new hotel and spa in Aspen?
琳达本来想在那儿办婚礼的
Linda wanted to have her wedding there
可是太贵了
but she couldn't afford it.
恨我吧 琳达
Suck it, Linda!
不 你猜得不对
No, it's not that.
我本想等到了那儿再弄的 你来把着方向盘
I was gonna wait till we got there, but here, grab the wheel.
柯尔特 搞什么
Colt, what the hell?
香槟
Champagne!
今天是你生日而且我知道你有多爱喝香槟
Yeah, it's your birthday and I know how much you love champagne.
"亲爱的艾比 别信柯尔特的话 以为这是他买♥♥的"
"Dear Abby, don't let Colt tell you this is from him."
"生日快乐 玛姬"
"Happy birthday. Maggie."
我应该先看这个的
Probably should have read that first, huh?
这个不是重点
That's not the important part.
打开信封看看 - 好吧
Open the envelope. - All right.
开什么玩笑
Are you kidding me?
加斯布鲁克斯演唱会的门票 - 对
Garth fucking Brooks? - Yeah!
我爱死你了
Oh, my God, I love you so much!
耶
Yes!
这就有点爱过了
That's a little too much love.
这是有史以来最棒的生日礼物
This is the best birthday gift ever.
谢谢 - 嗯
Thank you. - Yeah.
你最近没少受委屈
You've put up with a lot lately
所以我想给你些特别的东西
so I wanted to do something special for you.
我打电♥话♥找人帮忙弄到了两张票
I called in a little favor and got a couple tickets.
要是有人问起来 你就说自己只能活两个星期了
Oh, uh, if anybody asks, you've got two weeks to live.
嘿 - 天啊
Hey. - Oh, my God!
雪已经积了60厘米高了
Must be two feet of snow out there already.
得把我的胸罩挂到车天线上
Had to tie my bra to the antenna
牧场趣事（2016）
The Ranch
剧集 | 牧场趣事（2016） | 导航列表