牧场趣事（2016）

The Ranch S02E08

Part 2 June 24, 2021, 11:37 a.m.

我想我觉得
I guess I feel that...
交往会破坏我们之间的友谊
if we start dating... it's gonna ruin our friendship.
接着我又想
Then I think...
要是我俩都想突破这层友谊呢
What if we both want more than a friendship?
然后我又想我才刚离婚
Then I think, I just got divorced.
或许还没准备好跨出这一步
Maybe I'm not ready for any of this.
但再说一次我不想聊这事儿
But again, I don't want to talk about it.
每次舞会都有这种事
You know, I see this every prom.
女孩儿们站一边男孩儿们站另一边
Girls on one side, guys on the other side.
谁都不敢往前跨出一步
Everyone too scared to make a move.
然后菲利普斯小姐站在中间
And then there's Miss Phillips in the middle,
自己一个人跳机器人舞
doing the robot alone!
你该跟乔安妮谈谈
You should talk to Joanne.
我不知道
I don't know.
只有这样才能知道她怎么想
It's the only way to find out what she's thinkin'.
非常感谢艾比 -随时欢迎本奈特先生
Appreciate it, Abby. - Oh, anytime, Mr. Bennett.
要是我跟柯尔特需要建议我就找你
If I ever need advice about Colt and me, I'll come to you.
我现在就有个建议
I got some right now.
跟他分了躲远远的
Break up with him and run.
嘿看啊
Hey. Oh, check it out.
我往杯子里装满了雪还倒了啤酒
I filled up this old cup with snow and I poured beer in it.
这就是啤酒冰沙
It's a beer slushie.
躲远远的
Run.
嘿亲爱的 - 嘿你今天过得如何
Hey, babe. - Hey. How was your day?
好挺好的嘿猜猜我在酒吧碰到谁了
Good. Good. Oh, hey, guess who I ran into at the bar?
海瑟她在跟一个叫保罗的家伙约会
Heather. She's on a date with some dude named Paul.
天啊保罗真的假的我不知情
Oh, my God. Paul? Really? I had no idea.
你认识他 - 对他是新来的数学老师
You know this guy? - Uh, yeah. He's the new math teacher.
还是摔跤教练
And wrestling coach.
他每周一都带甜甜圈来
He brings donuts every Monday.
那种果冻的好吃到不行
Those jelly ones are good as fuck.
那次老师们都出去吃午饭了
Anyway, bunch of teachers, we were out for lunch,
海瑟来了所以我就介绍了他俩认识
and Heather was there, so I introduced her to Paul,
我不知道他约海瑟出去的事
but I had no idea that he asked her out.
你干吗介绍他俩认识
Why would you introduce them?
摔跤教练都是变♥态♥
Wrestling coaches are pervy.
不信去问问公鸡延森教练和他的固技
Ask Rooster about Coach Jensen and his advanced pinnin' techniques.
你吃醋了
Are you jealous?
我没有你怎么这么问
No, I'm not jealous. Why would you ask that?
那哪不对了
So, then what's the big deal?
海瑟正怀着我的孩子
The big deal is Heather's having my baby.
跟她在一起的人
And anyone she hangs out with
将来可能会跟我的孩子一块儿生活
is potentially gonna be hanging out with my kid.
我的孩子将来可不当摔跤手
I don't want my kid bein' a wrestler.
或是数学好
Or good at math.
我敢说他将来数学肯定不会好
Well, if it makes you feel better, I'm sure he'll wrestle with math.
保罗是好人 - 是吗真的吗
Paul's a good guy. - Oh, yeah? Really?
那她怎么不介绍我们认识
If he's a good guy, why didn't she introduce me to him?
或许她觉得你会激动吧 - 我激动个什么
Maybe she thought you'd overreact. - How would I overreact?
要是他是连环杀人犯怎么办
I'm... What if this guy's a serial killer?
他不是连环杀人犯
Paul is not a serial killer.
你别无中生有了
You're making a big deal out of nothin'.
什么人会30岁
What kind of 30-year-old guy
莫名其妙搬来科罗拉多州加里森市
just moves to Garrison, Colorado out of nowhere
跟一个23岁的姑娘交往
and starts datin' a 23-year-old?
你啊
You did.
老妈想谈什么
You know what Mom wants to talk to us about?
不知道 - 真的
No clue. - Really?
等等
Wait.
妈呀
Holy shit.
是要教育我们俩吗
Is this an intervention?
你破坏我们之间的约定了 - 不你呢
Did you break our pact? - No. Did you?
没有就像之前讲好的
No. Like we said...
"绝不参与另一个人的教育"
"Never be part of the other person's intervention."
行了
All right, cool.
嘿谢谢你们能来
Hey, guys. Thanks for coming.
我要跟你们谈谈
Something I need to talk to you about--
老妈接下来让我来说
Mom, I'll take it from here.
公鸡你喝酒已经影响到了我
Rooster, your drinking has affected me and...
这个要讲但不是今天
That talk is coming, but not today.
听着你们俩小时候
Look, when you guys were little,
给一个买♥♥了玩具另一个就也得有
if I bought one of you a toy, I had to get the other one a toy.
所以考虑到这一点柯尔特这个是给你的
So, with that in mind, Colt, I got you this.
柠檬脆
Oh! Thin Mints!
还是冷冻的太棒了
And they're frozen! Fuck, yeah!
我也有东西给你公鸡
I got you something, too, Rooster.
我想把酒吧给你
I wanna give you the bar.
什么
What the fuck?
等等什么你说什么
Wait, what? What... what are you talkin' about?
听着就是个小提议
Look, it's a simple proposal.
你来经营利润咱们母子俩平分
You run the place and we split the profits.
你有稳定的工作
That way, you have a steady job
而我就能真正摆脱这里去旅行了
and I can, you know, finally get out of here and travel.
等一下
Wait a second.
你先是把小木屋给了公鸡
First, you give Rooster the huntin' cabin
现在还要给他份
and now you're givin' him a job
让他在酒吧干活能整天喝酒的工作
where he works at a bar and he gets to drink all day?
而我要跟老爸一块儿干活
I have a job where I work with Dad
逼得我不得不成天借酒消愁
and I have to drink all day!
柯尔特我也会为你做同样的事
Look, Colt, I'd do the same for you,
但你不需要工作或是住处
but you don't need a job or a place to live.
不知怎的你却成了那个优秀的儿子
Somehow you ended up the son who's doing well.
我说不好我是说
I don't know. I mean...
我能卖♥♥假身份证给未成年人然后放他们进来吗
could I really sell kids fake IDs and then accept them?
我想我可以
I believe I could.
听着公鸡你向来不喜欢
Look, Rooster, your problem has always been
听别人发号♥施令
that you don't like people telling you what to do.
你出生时
I mean, when you were born,
大夫拍你让你哭出来
the doctor slapped you to make you cry
而你就只管笑还尿在了他脸上
and you just laughed at him and peed in his face.
那还挺酷的
That would be pretty badass.
自己定规矩还不守规矩
Make my own rules and don't even follow 'em.
对我开始喜欢这个主意了 - 是啊
Yeah. I'm startin' to like this. - Yeah.
我管牧场你管酒吧
I run the ranch, you run the bar...
等等我试试
Wait a second. Let me try somethin'.
"公鸡来杯免费的威士忌"
"Rooster, give me a free whiskey."
好耶感觉不错
Oh, yeah, I like... That's right.
新规矩
Actually, I got a new rule.
柯尔特从现在起你喝酒得付钱
Colt, from now on, you pay for all your own drinks.
妈
Mom!
我知道这是个大事
I know this is a really big deal,
不用急好好考虑一下
so you just take your time and think about it.
我确实挺喜欢这里好玩儿吧
I do love this place. It's funny, huh?
本以为自己会被教育
You think your mom might be givin' you an intervention.
结果拿到了间酒吧
Instead, she gives you a bar.
既然我想起来了而且你们俩都在
Actually, now that I think of it, and you guys are together,
我们该好好聊聊你们喝酒的事 - 我得走了
maybe we should talk about you boys and your drinking and... - I gotta go.
我很高兴你打电♥话♥来了
So, I'm glad you called.
我还不知道要来这么高档的地方
I didn't know we were meetin' someplace so fancy.
我知道你是开玩笑
I know you're jokin'.
但这里的豌豆汤上面加了片火腿
But the split pea soup comes with a piece of ham on top.
你怎么样
How are you doin'?
我挺好的你好吗 - 挺好
I'm pretty good. How are you? - Good.
我来时看到路上有辆雪佛兰
I saw a Chevy on the way over here.
我就想有可能是你
Thought maybe it was you.
结果不是
It wasn't.
我看到路上有辆福特
I thought I saw a Ford on the way over here.
结果是个侧翻的大垃圾箱
Turned out to be just a dumpster lyin' on its side.
我们就这么
Are we just gonna...
尴尬地坐着
sit here awkwardly and