牧场趣事（2016）

The Ranch S02E09

Part 3 June 24, 2021, 11:37 a.m.

一起干活互相逗乐
Workin' together. Messin' with each other.
老爸的笑话太损了
Dad's jokes are just mean.
有天我们在河边
Other day, we were by the river,
他说 "想看魔术吗"
he said, "Hey, you wanna see a magic trick?"
我说 "当然了" 他说 "看我怎么消失"
I said, "Sure." He said, "Watch me disappear."
他就开车走了把我留在了那儿
He just drove off and fuckin' left me there.
那也好过他说
Yeah, that's better than when he says,
"想看看我的靴子是怎么不见的吗"
"You wanna see my boot disappear?"
相信我
Trust me.
你可以回来跟我们一块儿干
You know... you could come work here with us.
我不会再给老爸干活儿了
I ain't working for Dad again.
得了你这只是犯倔
Ah, come on. You're just being stubborn.
你需要份牧场的活儿
You need a ranchin' job.
春天时我们要招人
In the spring, we got one to offer.
疼死了干嘛啊你
The fuck, man?
对雇员这么做可就是人身攻击了
You do that to an employee, it's just assault.
该死
Goddamn.
他说得很清楚他不想我回来
Well, he made it pretty clear he doesn't want me back, so...
老爸年纪大了
Well, Dad's gettin' pretty old.
或许我们可以说服他你没离开过
Maybe we can convince him you never left.
他他妈来这干吗
What the fuck is he doin' here?
没什么
Never mind.
公鸡修好了发电机 - 是啊不用谢
Rooster fixed the generator. - Yeah. You're welcome.
回头见
All right. See you later.
我的确想念这么做
I did miss that.
我们可以每天都这么玩
We could do this every day.
我跟你说过别叫公鸡来
I told you not to ask Rooster.
他把它修好了
He fixed it.
要知道这样说不通
You know, this don't make any sense.
他需要工作而我们就有
He needs a job and we got one to give.
我给过他工作是他拒绝了
I offered him the job. He turned it down.
你那是要给他工作吗
Did you offer it to him?
还是你只是让他觉得
Or did you just make him feel
自己被开除又没工作像个废物似的
like shit for getting fired and not having a job?
问题在于你说话的方式老爸
See, it's how you say things, Dad.
像你今早说
Like this morning when you said,
"你♥他♥妈♥怎么把咖啡煮糊了"
"Why's the fucking coffee burnt?"
你本可以这么说
What you could've said was,
"儿子谢谢你早起给我煮咖啡"
"Hey, son, thanks for waking up early and making me coffee."
"下次煮淡点儿"
"Next time, I prefer a lighter roast."
我们不雇公鸡这个话题到此结束
We're not hiring Rooster. And I'm done with this conversation.
他在这儿我们更得心应手
We're better off havin' him here.
忘了之前的不快吧
You guys gotta get over this little fight.
你总说家人第一
You're always sayin' family first.
那你为什么不收起你的自尊
Well, why don't you swallow your pride
为这个家考虑一下
and do what's best for the family?
嘿儿子看好了
Hey, son, watch this.
嗒哒吧啦
Abra-fucking-cadabra.
嘿博 - 嘿乔安妮
Hey, Beau. - Hey, Joanne.
我本来想给你带花的接着我转念一想
So I was gonna bring you some flowers, and then I decided,
何不带四朵玫瑰酒呢
why not bring Four Roses?
波旁威士忌我会把这个放进水里的
Bourbon. I'll go put this in some water.
准备好了吗
Ready to go?
今晚的计划可能要稍有变动
About tonight, uh, might have to change our plans a little.
我没问题不必非得去金克拉尔堂吃
Well, I'm flexible. We don't have to eat at the Golden Corral.
可以叫他家外卖♥♥吃
We can get Golden Corral to go.
其实我外孙女来了
Actually, uh, my granddaughter's here.
她妈妈本来一小时前就该来接她的
Her mom was supposed to pick her up an hour ago.
结果到现在也没消息
I haven't heard from her yet.
你来之前我试着给你打过电♥话♥
And I tried to call you before you got all the way out here.
抱歉
Sorry.
之前去教堂柯尔特把我的手♥机♥静音了
Colt turned my ringer off a while back for church.
我不知道怎么调回来
I can't figure out how to turn it back on.
我想那就改天吧
So, I think I need a rain check.
除非你想第一次约会
Unless you want our first date
吃炸鱼条还有芝士通心粉
to include fish sticks and mac and cheese.
我去金克拉尔也会点这些
That's pretty much what I was gonna order at the Golden Corral.
进来吧 - 谢谢
Well, come on in. - Thank you.
这是谁啊
Who do we have here?
妮可这是我朋友博
Nicole, I'd like you to meet my friend Beau.
嗨 - 你好妮可
Hi. - Hi there, Nicole.
把你的手♥机♥给我
Let me see your phone.
什么 - 快点手♥机♥给我
What? - Come on, let me see your phone.
妮可你能帮他把手♥机♥铃♥声♥打开吗
Nicole, can you turn on Beau's ringer for him?
我已经摆弄了几个星期了
I've been fiddling with that thing for weeks.
我不觉得她能搞定
Can't imagine she's gonna fix it.
戈尔巴乔夫先生拆掉这堵墙
Mr. Gorbachev, tear down this wall.
对就是这个铃♥声♥
Yep, that's my ringtone.
谢谢各位我去去就回
Thanks, folks. I'll be back in a bit.
记住你喝得越多我的歌♥就越好听
And remember, the more you drink, the better I sound.
嘿没想到你会来
Hey. I didn't think you were comin'.
我不是来看你的
Oh, I didn't come to see you.
我是来警告酒保锁好收银机的
I came to warn the bartender to lock the register.
你开玩笑呢但如果你分散他的注意我跟你对半分
You joke, but if you distract him, I'll cut you in for half.
要喝什么吗 - 我来
You guys need somethin'? - I got this.
他们给了我两张免费饮品券
They gave me two free drink tickets for playing here,
所以说起来这不是义务的
so it's technically not volunteer work.
我要汽水和
I'll have a club soda and...
其实我也是酒保所以别费事了
Actually, I'm a bartender, too, so keep it simple.
我喝扎啤就好瓶装啤酒也行
I'll just have whatever's on tap. Or a bottle.
算了我也喝汽水吧
You know, forget that. I'll just have a club soda, too.
不知道怎么着吗去他的
No, you know what? Fuck that.
我要蓝宝石马天尼多加份橄榄汁要两颗橄榄
I'll have a Sapphire martini, extra dirty, with two olives.
饮品券只能喝扎啤
The drink tickets are only good for draft beer.
百威有吗
Budweiser?
但还是要加两颗橄榄
But I still want the two olives.
你怎么改主意了
So, what made you change your mind?
不知道我想听你唱歌♥
I don't know. I wanted to hear you sing.
而且我很想试试这款新打火机软件
And I got this great new lighter app I've been dyin' to try out.
我很高兴你能来 - 我也是
Well, I'm glad you're here. - Me too.
有什么要求吗 - 有再多给些饮品券
Any requests? - Yeah. More drink tickets.
知道嘛牛叫其实不是 "哞"
You know, cows don't really go, "Moo."
我不知道这个叫法是打哪来的
I don't know where that got started.
牛叫其实更像是
If anything, it's more like...
你笑了不过我学得非常像
You're laughing, but that was spot on.
还不赖你将来会是个牧活儿好手
Yeah, that's pretty good. You'd make a good little rancher.
但千万别让猪
But you don't want your pig
挨着牛跟马吃草
to graze next to your horse and your cows.
那会感染阿米巴虫
That's a recipe for amoebic giardia.
但小猪跟小马是好朋友
But Piggy and Horsey are friends.
要是你不把那扇栅栏修好
Well, if you don't fix that fence up,
小猪跟小马就要被坏狼狼吃掉了
Piggy and Horsey are gonna get slaughtered by Wolfy and Coyote.
嘿宝贝你妈妈来电♥话♥了
Hey, sweetie, that was your mommy.
猜猜怎么着她说你晚上可以睡这儿
Guess what? She says you can sleep over tonight.
好耶
Yay!
真希望我之前没给你糖吃
Wish I'd known that before I gave you all that candy.
不如你上楼去铺床
So, how about you run upstairs and get ready for bed,
我马上就来给你讲故事好吗
and I'll be up in a minute and read you a bedtime story, okay?
好的外婆
Okay, Nana.
跟博说晚安 - 晚安博
Say good night to Beau. - Good night, Beau.
晚安牧场小帮手
Good night, ranch hand.
她好像对牧活儿挺感兴趣的
You know, she showed an interest.
要是你需要睡前故事
If you need a bedtime story,
我车上有些讲口♥蹄♥疫♥的宣传册
I think I've got some pamphlets in the truck on hoof and mouth disease.
刚才来电♥话♥的是我女儿
That was my daughter.
她酒后驾车被抓了
She got arrested for a DUI.
这已经是第三次了
And it's her third one.
也就是说她要坐牢接受酗酒康复治疗并且被吊销驾照
So that means jail and rehab and no license.
真是一团糟啊 - 有什么我能帮忙的吗
It's a damn mess. - Anything I can do to help?
非常感谢但我想没有
Oh, I appreciate that, but I don't think so.