女子监狱

Orange Is the New Black S01E03

Part 6 Oct. 27, 2019, 7:03 p.m.

Le Grand Fromage? Bullshit, bullshit.
格兰特干酪全是胡编乱造
You need a lesson in fudging a resume.
你得学习如何写假简历
Do you work here?
你在这里工作吗
Are you fucking kidding me?
你开什么玩笑
Manager, Polly Harper.
经理波丽·哈珀
No one named Polly Harper gets put in charge.
叫这个名字的人不可能当头儿
Who is that really?
这人到底是谁
My friend.
我朋友
You've never waited a fucking table in your life, have you?
你这辈子从未当过服务员对吗
No.
没有
So, Piper Chapman,
帕波·查普曼
a Smith grad with "excellent listening skills.
史密斯大学毕业善于倾听
Passionate about making diners feel good."
热衷于令就餐者感觉良好
Mm, that sounds kind of dirty. Keep them coming.
这句有点色继续上酒
Safe, clean, and careful when handling food and drink."
上菜与端酒水时安全干净且细致 "
Gosh.
我的天
I like that in a woman.
我喜欢这样子的女人
What else do I need to know about you?
你还有什么优点我需要知道的
Who are you?
你是谁
My name is Alex.
我叫艾丽克斯
What do you do, Alex?
你是做什么的艾丽克斯
Besides make fun of strangers in bars.
除了在酒吧调戏陌生人之外
I work for an international drug cartel.
我为国际贩毒集团工作
Oh, come on. You're telling me you don't get lonely out here
得了吧你是说你在这里不寂寞吗
in the middle of nowhere?
这么荒凉的地方
No. I'm not into people. I'm more into beans.
我不喜欢与人交往我更喜欢豆类
Did you see my long beans? They're going off.
你看到我的豆角了吗长得不错
And my banjo.
还有班卓琴
Those are my friends, my beans and my banjo.
它们是我的朋友豆类和班卓琴
And I'm banging this underwater welder.
而且我和一个水下焊接工在做炮友
You got to have hobbies.
得有些爱好才行啊
What about you? What's happening with the writing? No gigs?
你呢写作顺利吗没活儿吗
Been a little distracted.
有些心烦意乱
Maybe you heard. My fiancee's in prison.
也许你听说了我的未婚妻在监狱里
Oh. Hey. When you visit, do you get to, uh...
你去看望她时有没有...
No. They don't allow conjugals in federal.
没有联邦监狱不允许夫妻行为
It's a lot of me, myself, and I.
我自己解决了很多次
Bummer.
真不爽
You you got to try edging, man.
你应该试试"擦边机"
What is that?
是什么
It's where you you jerk off, okay,
你自己打飞机时
right to the point of orgasm
在快达到高潮的时候
and then stop.
停下来
And you do this because?
这样做的原因是什么
Because your jizz is your power, man. It's spiritual.
因为精液是你的能量源你的精神气儿
It keeps your chi inside,
令气保留在体内
especially if you got writer's block.
尤其是你文思枯竭的时候
You got to walk right up to that line, bro,
兄弟你就得在达到高潮前的一刻
and not cross it.
停下来
And this is something you do?
你这样做吗
Yeah. The welder chick taught me.
对那个焊接小妞告诉我的
See, you got to, um you got to grab right underneath your balls,
你得抓住你的蛋下面
like right here. You really got to get up right up in there.
就在这里你得把这里抓起来
Okay, yeah.
别碰
And it creates, like, a whole body thing,
能产生全身的兴奋感
kind of like a female orgasm.
有点像女性高潮
You know, most dudes, they don't know what women got.
大多数男人不知道女人的感觉
But trust me, bro. It is way, way better.
相信我兄弟比男人的高潮爽多了
A lot of creative people do it.
许多有创造力的人都这么做
In fact, they say that John Lennon
事实上他们说约翰·列侬
wrote Imagine
写出《想象》这首歌
right at that sweet spot.
就是在这样爽过之后
Fifteen months.
十五个月
Whoa. That's a long time to wait,
要等很长时间啊
even if it is for my sister.
就算是我自家妹子
How about we don't talk about sex with your sister?
还是别说我和你妹上床的事了
Good point.
有道理
Did you see this coming?
你料到有这种事吗
With Piper?
帕波的事吗
Eh, no, not jail, but something, yeah.
没料到坐牢不过其它事有可能
I mean, she wants to feel like she's different.
她希望感觉自己与众不同
Likes the whole "I'm risky" thing.
她喜欢冒险
My sister's a complicated cat.
我妹是个挺复杂的小妞
So I'm learning.
我知道了
Not like my parents ever saw it.
我父母没想到会这样
Between "Perfect Piper," and "Doctor Danny,"
家里有个完美帕波和医生丹尼
they met their quality parenting quota.
他们已经达到优质父母的标准了
But, like, I was free to smoke a bowl
而我就可以随便抽大麻
and fuck off for the rest of my life with nobody ever bothering me.
这辈子无所事事也没人会管我
Now my mom's talking about coming up here to visit,
现在我妈居然说要来看我
putting me in the Christmas letter.
在圣诞信中提到我
Suddenly, I'm "Creative Cal."
突然一下子我成了创造力卡尔
It's fucked up.
真他妈的完了
Piper going to jail might be, like,
帕波进监狱有可能是
the worst thing that has ever happened to me.
我这辈子碰到的最倒霉的一件事
Sophia. I got you a present.
索菲娅我有礼物给你
It's powder foundation in medium dark.
这是中度深色的粉底
I had to guess. I hope it's all right.
我猜你用这个希望是对的
Honey, it's perfect.
亲爱的太完美了
That's real sweet of you. Thank you.
你真好谢谢
You're welcome.
不客气
I got commissary.
我可以在物资部买东西了
Look whose ship finally came in.
看来你的钱终于寄到了
Here. This is payback for all the stuff you gave me.
给还你送我的那些东西
And, Nicky, here's your cup.
妮琪这是你的杯子
And, um, Nivea. That's interest.
妮维雅算是利息吧
What else you got, kid? I'll take that face wash.
还有什么孩子洗面奶归我了
Don't be a commissary ho, DeMarco.
别看到有好东西就这么贱德玛克
And these. Ah! It's like Christmas.
这个真像圣诞节啊
Yo, P. Heads up. You got a visitor.
小帕注意了你有访客
Hello, baby.
你好宝贝
Can I talk to you?
我跟你谈谈好吗
Listen, Suzanne,
听我说苏珊娜
I, um,
我
I know that you like me.
我知道你喜欢我
I don't just like you, Piper.
我可不仅是喜欢你帕波
I got feelings,
我有感觉
love feelings.
爱的感觉
Yeah, I I got that.
我知道
Um, you know, maybe I was unclear,
也许我说得不够清楚
and I'm sorry if I gave you the wrong impression,
如果让你误会我很抱歉
but I cannot be your wife.
我不能做你的老婆
I've already promised to be someone else's wife.
我已经答应做别人的老婆了
Larry, whom I love very much.
莱瑞我非常爱他
And I'm just not interested in anybody else.
我不会喜欢其他人的
This is nothing personal.
不是针对你
But you and I… not gonna happen.
但我们之间不可能有戏
I feel you.
知道了
Where is he?
他人呢
He won't come. I tried.
他不愿意来我劝过了
They let him pitch Friday.
学校让他周五做了投手
This big game against Castle Hill. They won.
对城堡山学校的大比赛他们赢了
That's great.
太好了
You look like shit. What's wrong?
你的样子糟透了出什么事了
They took me off my hormones.
他们停了我的激素药
What? Why?
怎么会这样为什么
They're saying it's liver damage.
他们说出现了肝损伤
It's bullshit. They just don't want to be liable.
这是屁话他们不想有事担责任
Oh. I'm sorry, baby.
太遗憾了宝贝
I'm losing my shit, Crystal.
我快不行了克里斯托