好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S07E07
Part 2
Nov. 18, 2020, 4:59 p.m.
living in the same house with the same woman.
还是跟同一个女人住在同一栋房♥子里
Yes, yes, the same woman.
是的 是的 跟同一个女人
Forever.
直到永远
Hey, can I be the best man?
我能当你的伴郎吗
You'll need a sex change.
那你需要变性才行
Where you going?
你去哪
Out for a drink.
去喝酒
You can drink here.
你可以在这喝
I could, but I don't want to vomit here.
是的 但我不想吐在这里
Wait, wait, wait, I'll go with you.
等等 等等 我跟你一起去
Why? I'm not done ping at you.
为什么 我还没幸灾乐祸够呢
Hey, shouldn't you ask the ol' ball and chain first?
你是不是应该先问下老婆
I don't need her perssion.
我不需要她批准
Really? Yes, really.
真的吗 是 真的
Although, it is considerate
然而 贴心一点的做法是
to let your partner know your plans,
把行踪告诉你的伴侣
so she won't worry.
让她不用担心
Sweetie, I'm going out for a drink with Alan, okay?
甜心 我跟艾伦出去喝一杯 好吧
Sure! Have fun!
好啊 尽兴
Thanks! Love you!
谢谢 我爱你
Shut up.
闭嘴
You're driving.
你开车
Jake has one big-ass head.
杰克个猪头还真大
All kidding aside, she's a great girl
说真的 她是个出色的女孩
and I'm sure you're going to be very happy.
我确信你会很幸福
Thanks.
谢谢
Forever.
直到永远
Are you done poking?
你幸灾乐祸够了没
For the moment.
暂时够了
Boy, who would've figured that of the two of us
老兄 谁会想到我们当中
I'd end up being the carefree bachelor?
最后的洒脱的光棍是我
If by carefree, you mean broke and lonely,
如果洒脱是指破产和孤独
everybody would've figured.
谁都能猜得到
Charlie. Betsy.
查理 贝特西
I'm getting married on June 26.
我要在6月26日结婚
Good for you.
替你高兴
At the Bel Air Hotel
在贝尔埃尔酒店
Nice!
不错
That means no matter how easy you are,
也就是说不管你有多随便
I can't sleep with you.
我都不能跟你上♥床♥
I can. I'm Alan.
我能 我是艾伦
Can he buy you a drink?
他能请你喝一杯吗
What you watching?
你在看什么
Um! Golf!
高尔夫球
Don't sneak up on a guy, all right?
别偷偷的接近一个男人 好吗
Sorry.
对不起
Your dad watches a lot of golf, too.
你老爸也老是看高尔夫球
So, listen,
那么 听着
how'd you like to be a groomsman the wedding?
你想在婚礼上当伴郎吗
What do I gotta do?
我要做什么的
You just walk down the aisle with one of the bresmaids
你只要跟其中一位伴娘一起从走道进来
and stand with Charl during the ceremony.
然后在仪式期间站在查理旁边
Tell me more about the bridesmaids.
再跟我说说那些伴娘
They're friends of mine.
她们是我的朋友
So, they're old.
那么 都很老了
No, not all ofhem.
不 不是全部
I have a niece who's about your age.
我有个外甥女跟你差不多大
Is that she pretty
她漂亮吗
I think she's cute.
我觉得她很可爱
Okay, I know what that means.
好吧 我知道那是什么意思了
She's not a bainiac, is she?
她不是很聪明 对吧
What dose that mean?
什么意思
Well, I don't like 'em stupid,
嗯 我不希望她很笨
but I don't like 'em talkin' down to me either.
但我也不想她高人一等似的
Got it.
明白
And I like a little junk in the trunk.
还有我喜欢有点圆润的
You won't be disappointed.
不会让你失望的
All right, I'm in.
好吧 我去
Great.
很好
You know, of all the women my uncle's been with,
知道吗 所有跟我叔叔一起的女人当中
you're my favorite.
我最喜欢你
Oh, thank you.
谢谢
And theres been a lot.
她们可是好多人啊
I know.
我知道
A whole lot.
多了去了
Right.
对
Like, I'm betting around a thousand.
我敢说上千
And that's just since I've been old enough to pay attention.
而且只是从我开始留心时算起
No kidding.
不是吧
When I first got here, he told me
我第一次来的时候 他告诉我
that they were coming over to water the plants.
她们是来浇花的
And I believed him.
我还相信他了
What did I know?
我知道个啥啊
Sure. You were young.
是 你太小了
And naive, too.
并且天真无邪
We didn't have any plant
我们根本没有花
And there were some crazy ones, too.
还有些疯狂的呢
I'll bet.
我相信
Your niece doesn't have a license
你外甥女没有
to carry a concealed wean, does she?
携带枪♥械♥的许可证 对吧
No.
是的
Good.
好
You should've seen where this one girl hid hers.
你真应该见识下有个女的怎么藏她的枪的
Come out find out
后来发现
that what I thought was a boil on my neck
我以为脖子上起了个疙瘩
was actually a carbuncle.
实际上是长疮
Lovely.
有意思
Little known fact, uh,
鲜为人知的是
carbuncles are technically in the boil family,
疮实际上也是疙瘩的一种
but they take way longer to drain.
但它们皮下渗透更深
Charlie, help me here. I'm dying.
查理 来帮忙 我快不行了
No, you're doing fine.
不 你做的挺好
Tell her aboutour hemorrhoids.
跟她说说你的痔疮
Please, m begging you.
算我求你了
All right.
好吧
No sense letting my superpors go to waste.
没道理让我的超能力浪费掉
So, Dr. Harper,
这样 哈勃医生
Are we still going to Sun Valley in your Gulf Stream this weekend?
我们本周末还坐你的"湾流号♥"去太阳谷吗
You own your own trailer?
你自己有旅行房♥车?
No, no, no, that's an Airstream.
不 那是"湾流号♥"飞机
Dr. Harper has a private jet.
哈勃医生有一架私人飞机
Really?
真的吗
Oh, yeah.
对
He needs one for his work.
这是他的工作之需
What do you do?
你是做什么的
Uh, I am a chiropractor.
我是个脊椎指压治疗师
A chiropractor without boarders
无国界脊椎指压治疗师
He travels the world adjusting the backs of starving children.
他周游世界为忍♥饥挨饿的孩子们做背部按♥摩♥
Yes, you...
是的 你...
You have to be, uh, very careful, um
你必须得小心
because their little bones are very brittle.
因为他们幼嫩的骨头很脆弱
You're amazing.
你真了不起
Nah, it's just my job.
哪里 只是我的工作而已
You're amazing.
你真了不起
It wasn't tough.
小菜一碟
We had her at trailer.
我们在说旅行房♥车那一段时就搞定她了
Uh, another round. On him.
再来一杯 算他头上
Charlie...
查理...
Charlie?!
查理
Go away, Alan.
别烦我 艾伦
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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