好汉两个半（2003）

Two and a Half Men S07E05

Part 2 Nov. 18, 2020, 4:58 p.m.

and I don't think he met her
而且我认为在墨西哥玉米卷摊和公厕
at a taco truck or a public toilet.
都不可能认识这样的美女
You know what, I'm not hungry. Let's just go.
我没胃口了我们赶紧走吧
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
嘿嘿嘿嘿
We're not going anywhere.
我们哪里都不去
I want ice cream.
我要冰激凌
Why, you going to pour rum on it? No.
为什么你也想在那上面倒朗姆酒吗不
Crème de cacao
可可香草甜酒
All that drinking. You know, I feel sorry for you.
老是喝这种东西我都为你感到不好意思了
Don't feel sorry for me. You're the reason I drink!
别不好意思就因为你我才借酒消愁
Oh, please! If it weren't for me,
哦省省吧如果不是有我在
you would've choked on your own vomit years ago.
你几年前就被自己的呕吐物给呛死了
Hey, don't flatter yourself.
嘿别把自己想的那么崇高
I was vomit in my sleep long before you came into my life,
在你走进我的生活很久前我就会在睡觉时呕吐了
and I'll be vomiting long after you're gone.
并且在你滚蛋很长一段时间后我还会继续呕吐
Next, please. Oh, yeah.
下一个哦耶
Uh, I would like to sample
我想点这个
the, uh... the Passion Fruit,
百香果
and the Banana Brickle,
还有脆皮香蕉
and-- ooh-- uh, maybe the, uh, Nutty Butter Buddy.
再来个果仁味黄油饼吧
Oh, geez-- why don't you just get a double scoop of gayberry
天啊你为直接点两铲子"基浆果"
and be done with it?
不就结了吗
What... What do you want, Jake?
杰克你想要什么
A quick, painless death.
爽快利落地死
Hey, what happened to those cute girls?
那些可爱的小女孩呢
They left.
他们走了
Oh, too bad.
哦真糟糕
I think the one liked you.
我觉得那个女生喜欢你
They were looking over here a lot.
他们经常往这边张望
I know.
我知道
Next time, take a little initiative.
下次主动点
Yeah. We're not always going to be here to support you.
对我们不可能总是在这里支持你
So, you peek over your right shoulder
你从右肩这边往后看
and slide it into the spot.
然后慢慢开进停车点
Parallel parking.
平行泊车
Easy peasy.
小菜一碟
Are we home?
我们到家了
We're dropping off Jake.
我们要把杰克送回家
Oh.
哦
I kind of got a sugar crash off that ice cream.
那块冰激凌让我有点上头
Oh, yeah, it had nothing to do
哦是这跟你往冰激凌上
with the four ounces of liqueur you poured over it.
倒的四盎司甜酒没关系
Better liqueur than Halloween leftovers.
那可比万圣节的残羹好喝得多
They charge 50 cents for each topping,
每加一次甜酒他们就要收50美分
and I had perfectly good candy corn.
而且我的冰激凌上有很好吃的甜玉米
Okay, bye.
好的再见
See you next weekend.
下周末见
Yeah, maybe. What's that mean?
好吧也许吧那是什么意思
I'll call you.
我会打给你的
Okey doke.
好的
Boy, you really pissed him off.
乖乖你真的把他气坏了
I pissed him off? What about you?
我把他气坏了那你呢
Hey, he likes me.
嘿他喜欢我
Oh, please. Nobody likes you.
得了吧没人喜欢你
We only tolerate you because you have a lot of money.
我们容忍♥你只是因为你钞票多
All right, get out.
好吧滚出车去
What are you talking about?
你在说什么
This is my car.
这是我的车
Fine. How much do you want for it?
行啊你开个价吧
Don't be ridiculous.
别开玩笑了
We talking blue book? 'Cause I just put a new tire on it.
你是说真的吗我可是刚刚换了个新胎
You are a lush!
你个酒鬼
You are a leech
你个吸血虫
You are a misogynist!
你害怕女人
You are a mistake!
老妈生下你来就是个错误
You are a...
你个...
What are we up to? "N."
下个词该是什么开头了 N
Thank you.
谢谢
Uh, you are a...
你有
necrophiliac.
尸体嗜好症
She was drunk, not dead.
她只是喝醉了没有死
I challenge.
我提出异议
Ok, fine. You're a narcissist.
好吧你是个自恋狂
Better.
好多了
You are a Nancy boy.
你个搞基的
You are old.
你个老年人
You are odd...
你个
...ly shaped.
丑八怪
Hang on.
等等
You are a parasite.
你个寄生虫
Not your turn.
还没轮到你
Hello.
你好
Oh, hey, Judith. What's up?
哦嘿茱蒂丝出什么事了
What do you mean, what happened with Jake?
什么意思杰克怎么了
We had a nice weekend.
我们周末过得很愉快
Well, we went driving, to the movies, um, ice cream.
我们开车去了电影院冰激凌
Quack, rectal, suck-wad!
庸医小心眼小混混
I never got my "P."
我还没有说P开头的词
All you do is pee.
你只知道小便
What? What? Uh, n-nothing.
什么什么没事
Little... little word game. You know,
只是个小词汇游戏
exercise the brain. Twit!
活动下脑子笨蛋
Turd burglar!
一坨屎闯空门的
Judith, I-I-I don't know what Jake's problem is.
茱蒂丝我不知道杰克怎么了
We had a terrific weekend.
我们周末过得很愉快啊
Huh.
这样啊
Jake says he doesn't want to come here anymore.
杰克说他再也不想来这里了
Really? Why?
真的吗为什么
I don't know.
不知道
Did he say why?
他说了原因吗
Charlie and I don't bicker.
查理和我才不吵架呢
I mean, no more than any other couple.
我是说比其他夫妇吵得少多了
Of guys.
不是夫妇是兄弟
Right?
对吗
Right.
对
Oh, oh, !
哦
You are a eunuch.
你是个太监
That's "E," not "U."
那是E开头的不是U
Learn to spell. Useless!
注意拼写没用的家伙
Look, I don't know what to tell you.
我不知道该怎么和你说
He's a teenager-- he'll get over it.
他是个青少年会忘记这件事的
Okay. Okay.
好的好的
Bye-bye.
再见
Well, I hope you're happy.
这下你高兴了吧
I haven't been happy in seven years.
我都7年没有高兴过了
For your information, I will not have been here seven years until next fall.
和你说我要到明年秋天才住满七年
Oh, good to know.
哦很高兴知道这个
Circle the date on the calendar
在日历上把日子圈起来
so I'll know when to hang myself.
这样我就知道什么时候自己该上吊了
Ha, ha. Funny.
哈哈有意思
Itit's because of you Jake doesn't want to come here anymore. Great.
就因为你杰克不肯来了好极了
Tell me what I did so I can do it to you.
告诉我我做了什么我好用同样的方法赶走你
God, you are such a...
老天你真是个
What are we up to? "V."
接下去的单词是什么开头 V
Varmint!
恶棍
You are a varmint.
你个恶棍
Yeah, well...
好吧
you are a vagina.
你个阴♥道♥
You're calling me a vagina?
你称我为阴♥道♥
No, no, no, no, no.
不不不