生活大爆炸

The Big Bang Theory S04E24

Part 2 Oct. 4, 2019, 2:04 p.m.

Now bear down on it
接着向其施力
like the seventh grade noogies
就像我们熟悉的七年级生
we all know too well.
欺负人用的经典按头动作
Oh, dear Lord, yes, yes, oh, yes!
额滴神啊爽爽爽
Amy, I've never been touched like this before!
艾米以前从来没人这么摸过我
Oh! My hands are magic!
我的手简直是神来之手啊
Don't flatter yourself.
别自吹自擂了
Your hands are blunt tools guided by my knowledge
你的手不过是在本人神经系统知识指导下的
of the nervous system.
一个愚钝的工具而已
I could just as easily have paralyzed you.
我刚也可以轻易地让你瘫痪
There's someone at my door.
有人在敲门
That doesn't interest me. Good-bye.
我对此不感兴趣拜拜
- Can I sleep here tonight? - Why?
-我能在这里过夜吗 -凭什么
Leonard's having astronomically inaccurate
莱纳德正和我妹妹进行星际迷航式的性♥交♥
Star Trek sex with my sister.
那从天文学角度来说很不科学
I can see how that would be upsetting. Come in.
的确很令人心烦意乱进来吧
I'll get the sheets and blankets for the couch.
我去拿铺在沙发上的床单和毯子
Oh, don't bother. I'll just sleep in Leonard's room.
不用了我去莱纳德的房♥间睡就行
No, I can't authorize that.
不行我不能授权
Well, he's in my bed. Why can't I be in his?
他能睡在我床上我为啥不能睡在他床上
The Hammurabic Code is "an eye for an eye,"
汉谟拉比法典上规定可以"以眼还眼"
not "a bed for a bed."
而并非"以床还床"
Come on, dude, I'm exhausted,
行行好哥们我快累死了
and Tyra Banks says
提拉·班克斯说过
（提拉·班克斯美国著名模特）
the most important item in your makeup bag
化妆包里最重要的一样东西
is a good night's sleep.
就是夜晚香甜的睡眠
All right.
好吧
This is a form indemnifying me
要想使用"莱纳德的卧室"
from your use of "Leonard's bedroom."
需要先签署这张我的免责表
Sign here, indicating that I tried to stop you
在这里签字说明我试图阻止过你
and did so using a stern facial expression.
并摆出过严厉的面部表情
- Good night, Sheldon. - Wait. Not yet.
-晚安谢尔顿 -等等还没完
We still have to go over safety procedures.
我们还要重温一下安全规程
Now, the apartment has three emergency exits located
这间公♥寓♥里共有三个紧急出口分别在
here, here, and here.
这里这里和这里
In the event of a power outage,
万一遇到停电事故
luminous paint will guide you to the nearest exit.
夜光漆可指引你从最近的出口逃生
You're kidding.
开玩笑吧你
I never kid about safety.
在安全问题上我从不儿戏
What are you doing here?
你在我房♥间里干什么
I was sleeping.
睡觉啊
In my bed?
在我床上
Well, I would've slept in my own bed,
我也想睡在自己的床上
but it was being used to bring shame to my family.
但它却用来给我的家庭带来耻辱
And the memory of Gene Roddenberry.
还让我想起来了吉恩·罗登贝瑞
（吉恩·罗登贝瑞《星际迷航》中的演员）
Oh, you heard?
你听见了吗
"Scotty, I need more power."
"史考特我需要更多的能量"
Sorry. Does Sheldon know you're sleeping in here?
抱歉谢尔顿知道你睡在这里吗
Are you kidding? He made me sign a waiver,
怎么可能不知道他逼我签了免责书
participate in an emergency fire drill
参加了紧急消防演习
and take a refresher course in CPR.
还复习了心脏复苏术的课程
Thank God he had a dummy.
还好他有个人体模型
Oh, yeah. Mouth-to-Mouth Mona.
是啊嘴对嘴的莫娜
You know, she used to date Howard?
知道吗她和霍华德谈过恋爱
Oh, my God, she's that Mona?
天啊她就是那个莫娜吗
Why can't you and my sister spend your nights here?
你和我妹妹为什么不能在这里共度春宵呢
We tried. She doesn't get along with Sheldon.
我们试过但是她和谢尔顿合不来
Sheldon doesn't get along with Sheldon.
谢尔顿跟他自己都合不来
It's still no reason for me to have to listen to you
但那也不足以说服我听你的话
arm your photon torpedoes every night.
每晚都要装备上光子鱼雷
Okay, well, how about this:
好吧不如这样
until Priya gets her own place,
在普丽娅找到自己的住处之前
you stay here and I'll stay at your apartment.
你住在这里而我住在你家
Can I bring girls here?
我能带女孩过来吗
You?
就凭你
Sure. Bring as many as you want.
当然了想带多少带多少
Okay, deal.
好的就这么定了
Just not against their will.
别强迫她们就行了
You really think you should be eating that cake?
你觉得吃那块蛋糕合适吗
Why?
怎么了
If you're gonna be a trophy husband for a rich wife,
鉴于你即将成为富婆的小白脸老公
you might want to watch your waistline.
你可要注意自己的腰围啊
He's right.
他说得对
A minute on the lips, a lifetime on the hips.
嘴上一时享受臀上一世肥肉
Yeah, ha-ha.
是啊真幽默
First of all, I'm not threatened by my fiance's success.
首先我未婚妻的成功并没对我造成威胁
I'm proud of her.
我为她感到骄傲
And secondly, I have my own career.
其次我拥有自己的事业
Until you have kids.
有了孩子可就不一样了
Good news, Raj.
好消息拉杰
I got the blood work back from the lab.
我刚从实验室取回了你的血样报告
You're okay to stay for a while.
你可以在我家待上一段时间了
When did you take my blood?
你什么时候帮我抽的血
Not important.
这不重要
Your sugar was a little high.
你血糖有点偏高
I'd follow up with your regular physician.
我会跟你医生保持联♥系♥的
In the meantime, I have some paperwork here
同时这里还有些文件
for you to go over.
要请你过目
What the hell is this?
这又是什么东东
Boilerplate stuff.
都是些陈辞滥调啦
A modified roommate agreement for a temporary house guest.
针对临时住客的改良版室友协议
And a living will and durable power of attorney.
还有生前遗嘱和永久委托书
This says you can make "end of life" decisions for me.
这里说你可以帮我决定生命终止与否
As your friend, let's hope it doesn't come to that.
作为朋友希望事不至此
Please sign.
签名吧
Did you sign this?
你签过这个吗
There's a reciprocity clause.
上面有互惠条款
You get to pull the plug on him, too.
你也可以终结他的
Well, that seems fair.
好吧这样挺公平
Congratulations and welcome temporarily aboard.
恭喜了欢迎暂时入住
Here's your I.D. card,
这是你的ID卡
your key and your lapel pin.
钥匙和胸牌
Which Leonard was too cool to wear.
莱纳德居然觉得这胸牌配不上他
FYI, part of your responsibilities as roommate pro tem
还有作为临时室友的部分职责
will be to drive me to and from work,
是送我上下班
the comic book store, the barbershop
送我去漫画书店理发店
and the park for one hour every other Sunday for fresh air.
隔周周日送我去公园呼吸新鲜空气
Bring a ball or a Frisbee,
带上个球或飞盘
you know, something he can chase.
好让他去接
Also, you're tasked with bringing home all takeout dinners.
还有所有的外卖♥♥都由你负责帮我带
Tonight is Thai food.
今晚是泰国菜
You'll find the standard order in appendix B
标准点菜订单在附录B
or downloadable from my FTP server.
或可从我的FTP下载
If you have any questions,
如有任何问题
here's the FAQ sheet,
这里列出了常见问题的答案
or if you prefer the human touch,
若你更喜欢人性化解答
I do a live web chat called "Apartment Talk" on Tuesday nights
每周四晚我提供公♥寓♥问题的在线聊天服务
No backsies.
不许反悔哦
Sheldon, dinner!
谢尔顿吃晚餐了
What is this?
这是什么
This is the difference between eating and dining.
这就是单纯吃饭与用餐的区别
Remarkable. I'm just realizing how much
太了不起了我这才意识到
Leonard's been skating by all these years.
莱纳德这么些年一直有多敷衍
It's not a big thing.
没什么大不了的
（玛莎·斯图尔特美国家政女王主妇界的偶像）
Just think of me as a brown Martha Stewart.
就把我看成棕色版的玛莎·斯图尔特吧
Hey, Sheldon,
嗨谢尔顿
did you change your Wi-Fi password again?
你是不是又改了无线上网密♥码♥
Yes, it's "Penny, get your own Wi-Fi." No spaces.
对现在是"佩妮自己去开无线上网" 没有空格
Thanks.