生活大爆炸
The Big Bang Theory S04E05
Part 3
Oct. 4, 2019, 2:03 p.m.
but they see right through that.
却能立马看出你是装的
I want to invoke the girlfriend pact, Howard.
我申请调用女友约定 霍华德
You that desperate?
你这么饥渴
No, I just... I want what you have.
也不是 我就是想像你一样
You know, I want a woman in my life.
你懂的 身边有个女人
Holy Moses,
天呐
how much liquid can be in one tokus?
菊花到底能灌进多少液体啊
To be clear, I meant like Bernadette, not your mother.
明确一下 我说的是伯纳黛特不是你妈
Yeah, I know what you mean.
我明白你的意思
Well, I'm off to meet Bernadette's friend.
我要去见伯纳黛特的朋友了
How do I look?
我看起来咋样
As if one of the plants
就好像《人体异形》里
from Invasion of the Body Snatchers duplicated you in every way,
某植物复♥制♥出来的你
only with an absurd amount of hair gel.
不过是海量发胶版的
What are you working on?
你在干嘛呢
I'm removing my digital footprint from the Internet
我在清除我的网络足迹
so Amy Farrah Fowler can't find me
这样艾米·菲拉·福勒就找不到我了
and compel me to meet her mother. Ah.
也就没法逼我见她妈了
You're going off the grid.
你是在玩儿失踪啊
Exactly.
正解
The old Unabomber approach. Kudos.
早年炸♥弹♥客的做法啊 不错嘛
（16岁进哈佛 25岁成伯克利教授 后隐居邮寄炸♥弹♥）
Thank you.
多谢
I've also sent Amy a relationship termination notice
我还发给了艾米一封关系终止通知
and changed my cell phone number and e-mail address.
并更换了手♥机♥号♥和邮箱地址
What if she just comes over?
她直接过来怎么办
She'll get lost.
她找不到的
We no longer live at 2311 Los Robles.
我们已经不住Los Robles 2311号♥了
We now live at 311 Los Robles.
我们的现住址是Los Robles 311号♥
You changed the address on the building?
你把门牌号♥给改了
What about mail?
信件怎么办
Oh, no worries-- I explained my predicament
放心吧 我跟咱的邮差解释了
to our letter carrier.
我当前的囧境
He was sympathetic.
他很是同情
His exact words were:
他的原话是
"Got your back, Jack.
"哥们挺你 兄弟
Bitches be crazy."
妞儿们都疯了"
Who is it?
谁啊
Amy Farrah Fowler.
艾米·菲拉·福勒
Darn! She found me!
我去 被她逮到了
She's been here before.
她来过这里好不好
The only flaw in an otherwise perfect plan.
智者千虑必有一失
Now, get my back, Jack.
现在你得挺我 兄弟
- What do you want to do? - Tell her I'm not here.
-你想让我怎么办 -跟她说我不在
- Okay, where are you? - I don't know.
-那你在哪儿 -不知道
You'll have to devise a scenario
你得自己设计个情节
that plausibly explains my absence,
合理地解释我的不在场
keeping in mind that the key to a good lie lies in the details.
要记得 说谎的秘诀在于善于编织细节
Hi, Amy.
你好啊 艾米
Sheldon's not here.
谢尔顿不在
All right.
好吧
Way to go on the details.
细节编织得可真到位呀
Thanks again for doing this, Bernadette.
再次感谢你帮我 伯纳黛特
Oh, I take pacts very seriously.
我向来恪守约定
One time at my lab,
有一次在实验室
a petri dish of genetically modified super-virus went missing.
一个转基因超级病毒培养皿不见了
That day we made a pinky swear never to admit
那天我们都拉钩发誓绝不承认
we crossed Ebola with the common cold.
我们曾让埃博拉病毒和伤寒病毒结合
Why the hell
你们为什么要
would you cross Ebola with the common cold?
让埃博拉病毒和伤寒病毒结合
We never did.
我们没有啊
That would be a terrible, terrible thing.
那样就太可怕了
Hi. Sorry I'm late-- I was at the gym.
大家好 抱歉迟到了 我从健身房♥来
Spin class-- worked up quite a sweat.
动感训练课 真出了不少汗呢
Joy, this is Leonard. Leonard, this is Joy.
乔伊 这是莱纳德 莱纳德 这是乔伊
- Hi. - Hi.
-好啊 -好
You don't look like a genius.
你真没有天才相
Go ahead, say something smart.
来 说点有才的给姐听听
Uh... Aah! Time's up.
啊哈 时间到
Just kidding.
开玩笑啦
First thing you need to know about me:
你需要了解我的第一件事就是
I'm hilarious.
我超搞笑的
Yeah.
看出来了
So, Bernadette tells me
伯纳黛特告诉我
she knows you from self-defense classes?
你们是在自卫课上认识的
Yeah. Israeli Krav Maga.
没错 以色列格斗术
Lots of fun.
可好玩了
Basically, a hundred different ways
基本上是学了一百种不同的
to rip a guy's nuts off.
扯下男人蛋蛋的方式
Wow. Wouldn't think there'd be that many.
天呐 没想到这么多啊
Number 42!
四十二招
Whoa!
天呐
Isn't she a pip?
多可爱的姑娘啊
Proxima Centauri's the nearest star.
比邻星是最近的星星
The celestial bodies that follow are
接下来的天体顺次是
Alpha Centauri A, Toli,
半人马座艾尔法A星 托里星[B星]
Barnard's Star,
伯纳德星
Wolf 359...
沃尔夫359星
Lalande 21185,
拉兰德21185星
Sirius A, Sirius B,
天狼星A 天狼星B[双星]
BL-Ceti, UV-Ceti,
鲸鱼座BL星 鲸鱼座UV星
Ross 154...
罗斯154星
Ross 248...
罗斯248星
Epsilon Eridani,
天苑四星
Lac-9352,
拉卡伊9352星
Ross 128,
罗斯128星
Procyon A...
南河三A
Oh, darn, that's wrong!
见鬼 错了
EZ Aquarii A,
宝瓶座鲁坦星A
EZ Aquarii B,
宝瓶座鲁坦星B
EZ Aquarii C,
宝瓶座鲁坦星C
Procyon A.
南河三A
Those are the stars that are nearest to me.
这些是离我最近的恒星
Tra-la-la and fiddle-dee-dee.
一闪一闪那么地亮晶晶
Oh, dear.
天呐
They really do be crazy.
妞儿们真是疯了
This lobster's good on the way down
这龙虾口感十足
and the way up.
也回味无穷啊
Should be-- it's $30 a pound.
应该的 一磅要30大洋呢
Hey, this is a date, right?
这算是约会吧
Yep, it is.
没错
73!
第73招
Excuse me, I have to go to the little girls' room...
不好意思 我要去一下洗手间
and take a wicked whiz.
好好地通体舒畅一下
I'll go with you.
我也一起去
Fair warning-- I had the asparagus.
友情提醒 我刚吃了芦笋
My pea is gonna stink up the place.
我排泄出来的芦笋宝宝们会让这地方臭气熏天
I think she likes you.
我觉得她喜欢你耶
EZ Aquarii B...
宝瓶座鲁坦星B
EZ Aquarii C...
宝瓶座鲁坦星C
Excuse me, madam.
借过一下 女士
Sheldon?
谢尔顿
Rats!
靠
I believe a misunderstanding may have occurred
我请你去见我母亲这事
when I asked you to meet my mother.
我想你可能有点误会
No misunderstanding.
我没误会
I've learned what that request actually means,
我了解到那个要求意味着什么
and I don't want to be joined to another object
我不想变成一个斜面绕轴
by an inclined plane wrapped helically around an axis.
螺旋状转上几圈之后的样子
In what way are you screwed?
谁说你完蛋了
All I want to do is present you as my boyfriend to my mother
生活大爆炸
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