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Modern Family S05E24

Part 2 Nov. 29, 2019, 12:32 p.m.

But you and me -- we're cool, right?
有些事情我们可能需要谈一谈
We probably have some things that we should talk about,
但是留在压力没这么大的日子谈吧
but maybe we save it for a less-stressful day.
顺便说一句这不是你的错
This is not your fault, by the way.
火是不可抗力
the fire was an act of God.
不是说上帝搞了个火球
Not that God sent a fireball down
不让男人和男人结婚但是...
to keep a couple guys from getting married, but, uh...
我表达得不太好
I didn't say that right.
今天所有的一切都绝不可能
There's no way that this -- any of this --
是上帝的安排
is part of God's plan.
留到敬酒时再说吧老爸
Save something for the toast, dad.
该死
Damn it.
你想把这个放在哪里
Where do you want this?
五号♥巴士你的声音怎么了
Bus five. What's wrong with your voice?
我们三个自驾游去了
The three of us just took a road trip.
去德州边境的路上
We sang Broadway tunes
我们一直在唱百老汇的歌♥
all the way to the Texas border.
从德州另一面去佛罗里达的路上也是
And then from the other side of Texas to Florida.
所以你是牧师吗
Hey, so you're, like, the minister?
差不多吧萨尔走后
Kinda. When they lost Sal,
事情变得不费脑筋[没脑子]
the situation was a no-brainer,
所以他们想到了我
which made them think of me.
要证婚不是要记住很多东西吗
Isn't there a lot you have to remember to marry people?
没有啦都是一样的词儿
Not really. They all follow the same basic pattern.
我们今天齐聚一堂参加两位新人的
"We're gathered here today to join these two
神圣婚礼
"in holy matrimony.
你愿意让他做你的合法配偶吗
Do you take him to be your lawfully wedded spouse?"
第一个人说
And the first person says --
-我愿意 -对
- I do? - Right.
然后我问第二个人
Then I ask the second person,
你愿意让他做你的合法配偶吗
"Do you take him to be your lawfully wedded spouse?"
-你们知道这一套吧 -对[我愿意]
- You know the drill, right? - I do.
然后我说根据加利福利亚州
Then I say, "By the powers vested in me
赋予我的权力
by the state of California,
我宣布你们结为合法配偶
I now pronounce you legally wed."
噼里啪啦砰这婚就结成了
Bingo, bango, bongo, you're married.
太棒了
Awesome.
真的很棒
Really awesome.
巴布我理解你现在的经历
Look, Barb, I know what you're going through.
你和莫尔的婚姻走到了十字路口
You and Merle are at a crossroads in your marriage.
感觉像是世界末日
It feels like the end of the world,
但是不久后你会觉得这是...
but in time, you'll see it more as a --
对啊
Right.
就像打嗝一样的小插曲谁都会经历
A little hiccup that we all go through.
我的建议是什么都别做
My advice -- don't do anything.
花点时间喘口气
Just take some time and breathe.
从鼻子里呼气比较好
Maybe through your nose.
你在我的口袋里找到了什么吗
Did you happen to find anything in one of my pockets?
你这样问真奇怪[酒瓶]
Funny you should "Flask."
这个给我吧
Maybe I'll just take that.
不好意思
Excuse me.
现在轻多了对吧
Well, it's much lighter now, isn't it?
是啊
Yeah.
真奇怪
Okay, this is weird.
我觉得这就是我去学校路上时
I think this is the same seat I used to nervously scratch at
紧张抓挠的座椅
on my way to school.
真可怜
Oh, poor thing.
是啊
Yeah.
我那时就觉得要做到完美好有压力
Even then I felt such pressure to be perfect.
安迪的航♥班♥又延误了
Andy's flight is delayed again.
好吧很接近了
Okay. That was close.
我们差点就在人类水平上有交流了
We almost connected on a human level.
他在做蠢事
He's doing the dumbest thing.
他女朋友和他分手了
His girlfriend broke up with him,
他要飞过去赢回她的心
and he's flying out to win her back.
听起来好浪漫
That sounds so romantic.
太软弱了
It's so weak.
这女生一发脾气他就跑过去
This girl throws a fit, he goes running.
如果他们复合了她就大权在握了
If they get back together, she has all the power.
天啊你喜欢他
Oh, my god. You like him.
不我才没有什么啊
No, I don't. What?
太搞笑了
This is so hilarious.
他完全不是你喜欢的类型
He's totally not your type.
闭嘴
Shut up.
拜托你一直想着他查看他的情况
Please. You can't stop thinking about him, you're checking on him.
他甚至不像个真人
He's not even like a real person.
他就像个提线木偶
He's like a muppet.
我都不明白萨尔写的一些话
I don't even get some of Sal's remarks here.
婚姻就像是高速公路
"Marriage is like a freeway --
很凌乱但如果你们交流就很值得
Messy, but if you communicate, it's so worth it."
亲那不是"高速公路"[threeway: 三人式]
Honey, that does not say "Freeway."
我不能用这个
I can't use any of this,
但我不想让这场婚礼很普通
but I don't want the whole ceremony to be generic.
应该要有些魔力
There needs to be some magic in it.
你可以读一首诗或者
Well, you can read a poem or maybe --
等等往回倒
Hold on. Back up.
我喜欢你的上一个主意变魔术
I like your last idea -- a magic trick.
我没有提议要变魔术
I did not suggest a magic trick.
毕竟有什么比魔术
After all, what's better than magic
更能象征婚姻的美好呢
to symbolize the wonder of marriage?!
抱歉我在和你说话呢
Excuse me. I'm talking to you.
好吧
Yeah, yeah.
在商店里你穿起来还不错
They looked good on you in the store,
但现在你不确定了
but now you're not sure.
那是十分钟前的话题
That was the topic 10 minutes ago.
也许我把体育版贴到我头上
Well, maybe if I stapled the sports page to my head,
你就会注意到我了
you'd pay attention.
只要能盖住你的嘴
As long as it covered your mouth.
-什么 -没事
- What? - Nothing.
我们什么时候才能到啊
Ugh, when are we going to be there?
快了亲爱的很快了
Soon, honey. Very soon.
来笑一个
Come on. Give us a smile.
记住这是你♥爸♥爸们生命中
Remember, this is the happiest day
最快乐的一天
of your dads' lives.
蝴蝶在吃我
The butterflies are eating me!
谁要你碰那个盒子的
Well, who told you to jostle the crate?!
一只飞进了我嘴里
Oh, blah. One got in my mouth.
真是一群小孩
What a bunch of babies.
胡娇说这里很棒希望我们会喜欢
Pepper said it was nice. I hope we like it.
小卡不管帘子那边是什么样
Cam, Cam, listen, whatever's on the other side of this curtain,
我们都不能失望
we cannot be disappointed.
你说得对
You're right.
今天的重点不是花朵或其他肤浅的事
Today is not about flowers or superficial things.
对好吧
Right. Okay.
-谢天谢地 -好漂亮我害怕死了
- Oh, thank god. - It's pretty. I was so scared!
我超喜欢我都要哭了
Oh, I love it, I love it. I could cry!
别哭了会把脸上打的修容粉毁掉的
Oh, don't cry. You'll streak your bronzer.
大家请就坐
Everyone, please take your seats!
我们五分钟[西语]后开始
We'll be starting in cinco minutes,
也就是最多十分钟
10 at the most.
你有没有发现罗纳多的
Do you ever notice with Ronaldo
语言障碍时不时会发作是吗
how his language barrier sort of fluctuates?
这地方是怎么订到的
How is this place even available?
可怕的故事
Oh, dreadful story.
新娘跑了新郎闹自杀世仇家族
Runaway bride, suicidal groom, feuding families.
相比之下我们的小问题真是不值一提
It really puts our mundane problems in perspective.
灯光不能调暗
Oh, we can't dim the lights.
那就打碎几盏
Then break some.
他们已没有年轻人那么无敌的皮肤了
These are not young men!
你们去梳洗打扮一下吧
Why don't you two go freshen up?
等等