摩登家庭
Modern Family S05E18
Part 5
Nov. 29, 2019, 12:32 p.m.
让我们都深呼吸一下
Let's take a deep breath...
进来浴缸里
Get in the tub...
没可能的
That's not happening.
你想跟我说一下
You want to tell me
你是如何"不小心"把房♥卡给了别人吗
how you "Accidentally" gave someone your key?
那你想跟我说一下你一整天是如何
You want to tell me why you spent all day
从某个男人的肚脐上喝龙舌兰酒的吗
sipping tequila out of some guy's navel?
你看见了
You saw that?
我猜的
I guessed.
伙计们 出了什么事
Hi, guys. What's going on?
克莱尔 你能等下再来吗
Hey, Claire. Can you please just come back?
我们正在吵架
We're in the middle of an argument.
我猜我知道原因
Oh. Bet I know why.
你们还要进来泡澡吗
Are you guys getting in the bath?
也许我猜错了
Or I'm way off.
朗翰姆
Langham!
是蒂姆 不能让他知道我在这
It's Tim.He can't know I'm here.
他有非常严重的信任问题
He has insane trust issues.
非常严重
Insane?
朗翰姆 你在里面吗
Langham, are you in there?
-从这个门出去 -在这里
- Go out this door. - In here.
歌♥洛莉亚 快点好吗
Gloria, hurry up, will you?
他就要上来了
He's on his way up.
我要刮胡子
I need to shave.
你来啦
Oh, you're here.
我是杰·普里契特
Jay Pritchett.
谢谢你过来
Thanks for stopping by.
浴袍不错
Nice robe.
像《重回昨日》里那个何夫
Like Hef, Back In The Day.
我就有话直说了
I'm gonna cut to the chase.
我喜欢你的生活方式
I like your lifestyle.
我也想感受一下
I want a taste of it.
当然 我很荣幸 但是
Well, s-sure, that's flattering, but...
好吧 浴室是你的了
Okay, the bathroom is all you--
歌♥洛莉亚 这位是伯特·坦纳
Gloria, it's Burt Tanner!
那才不是伯特·坦纳
That's not Burt Tanner,
那是朗翰姆
that's Long-ham.
朗翰姆
Langham!
那玩意在这里干什么
What's that thing doing here?
享用一杯马天尼酒
Just enjoying a dirty martini
只为在那浴室中荡涤嬉闹
before a cleansing romp in the bath.
我不是为这位准备的沐浴
That's not who the bath is for.
我搞错了
Oh, my mistake.
欢迎您 克莱尔
Welcome...Claire.
[Claire有"洁净"的意思]
过了今晚
You're certainly gonna be clean
你一定会洁净如初的 不是吗
by the end of the night, aren't you?
杰 我的护发品都忘带了
Jay, I forgot all my hair products!
我去和克莱尔借一下
I'm going to borrow from Claire.
好 安全了
Okay, the coast is clear.
杰
Jay!
快走 快快快
Go, go, go, go, go, go.
菲尔 你在这里啊
Hey. Phil, there you are.
德奇 你怎么知道我在哪里
Ducky! How'd you know where I was?
这座城市由魔法师掌管
Magicians run this town.
真的吗
Really?
才不是 我是高级尊贵层的修面管家
No. I'm a shaving butler up on plus.
今天发生的事情让我感到很抱歉
Look, I felt bad about how things went down today,
所以我想过来再给你一次机会
and I-I just wanted to give you another shot.
这边请
Right this way.
我真的觉得你会喜欢我的表演
I really think you're gonna like what you see.
先让我布置一下
Okay, let me just get everything set up.
破茧成蝶
Metamorphosis.
人们说唯一不变的是变化
They say the only constant is change.
不好意思 那个是啥
I-I'm sorry, what -- I-- s-- what is that?
我也不知道
Oh, I don't even know.
可能是我老婆买♥♥的东西
Something my wife bought.
我来把它拿走 开始
Let me just get rid of it. Here we go.
不是吧 又触动人家没有老婆的痛处
Really, uh, rubbing it in on that wife thing, huh?
破茧成蝶
Metamorphosis.
伯特
Burt!
非常高兴你能从楼上降阶相见
Nice of you to come down a floor
来看看底层人♥民♥是怎么生活的
and see how the other half lives.
如果你愿意
If you will,
请帮我把它提过头顶 在我手腕处收紧
raise it above my head and pinch it at my wrists.
只管系紧扎好
Go ahead and make it good and tight.
不用给我放水
Don't be easy on me.
好了
Okay.
现在
Now...
就像小小的橡树子成长为参天大树那样
as the lowly caterpillar becomes the majestic butterfly,
卑微的毛毛虫变成了壮丽的蝴蝶
as the tiny acorn becomes the mighty oak,
于是 我们完成了
so, too, do we complete our...
破茧成蝶
metamorphosis.
所以这只是虚张声势的把戏而已
So, it's the Governor's Bluff.
不 这可是对虚张声势的极大改善
Well, it's a huge twist on the Governor's Bluff.
不不不
No, no, no, no, no!
这里还有其他的元素
There were other elements.
你把我弄慌了
You just kind of threw me off.
我都忘了 我本应该
I forgot -- I was gonna --
华丽丽地出场 我应该用一个
as a flourish I was gonna use one --
太赞了
A-- that's amazing!
你用这种
Y-you lull me with this--
快捷变装迷惑我
- with this hacky quick change,
与此同时
and the whole time,
却把一只狗模型变成了火♥辣♥女佣
you're changing the fake dog into a hot maid?
太有才了 这才是魔术
It's brilliant! It's magic!
不 那叫做破茧成蝶
No, that's metamorphosis!
和你一样 伯特
Like you, Burt,
我享受更上乘的东西
I enjoy the finer things.
事实上
As a matter of fact,
那可能是我为你定的古巴货到了
that's probably the Cuban I ordered for you.
小卡 要是你想要一场单身派对
Cam, if you wanted a bachelor party,
你早说就好了嘛
you should have just said something.
我是在到这里以后 才知道我想要的
Well, I didn't know I wanted one until we got here.
可你却一直这样叹气
And you're so "Eh, eh, eh,"
-我都不敢说什么 -好吧
- I-I was afraid to say anything. - Okay, all right.
对于你们俩 幸运的是
Lucky for the two of you,
我比你们自己更了解你们
I know you better than you know yourselves,
而你俩所需要的是一点点
and what the two of you need
具有罪恶感的小乐趣
is a little guilty pleasure,
或者我可以称之为...
or should I say...
先生 您让我留意的苏格兰快递到了
The Scotch delivery you had me on the lookout for, sir.
我喜欢你的作风 普里契特
I like your style, Pritchett.
你入围了
You're in.
维加斯
Vegas.
这让我想起了我过世的爷爷
This reminds me of my late grandfather.
他是苏格兰人吗
He was Scottish?
他是脱衣舞男
He was a stripper.
好了
There we go.
孩子 你手艺不错
You've got the touch, kid.
我有幸继承了我母亲的小手 先生
I was blessed with my mother's small hands, sir.
我可以为您点一个免费赠送的
Shall I order your complimentary,
室内魔石按♥摩♥吗
in-room, hot-stone massage?
免费赠送的吗
Complimentary?
全都属于您高级贵宾体验之内的 先生
All part of the excelsior-plus experience, sir.
您先在私人健身泳池中泡一会儿再做更好
Might be nice after a dip in your private lap pool.
我从前怎么都没享受过这个
Oh, where has this been all my life?
我在电梯里看到一个竖琴师
You know, I saw a harpist in the elevator.
我们明天早午餐时可以让他过来演奏么
Can we get that for our brunch tomorrow?
要是我说了算肯定行 但是很遗憾
If it was up to me, yes, but unfortunately,
那是我们尊享极致会员的专属项目
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