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Modern Family S05E17

Part 3 Nov. 29, 2019, 12:32 p.m.

It'll be fun for me.
你是我的继女
You're my stepdaughter.
我比你大
I'm older than you.
瞧瞧已经很好玩了
You see? It's already fun.
先来做一个简单的工具箱
We're gonna start by building a simple toolbox.
首先我教你怎么切割木头
First, I'm gonna show you how to cut the wood.
我知道这对你来说太过高深小家伙
I know you're a little young for this, goober.
尽量吸收吧
Try to soak it all up.
这是什么
What's this thing?
台钳
A table vise.
台钳台
Table vise, ta--
不
No.
我已经和米奇尔经历过这种事了
I already went through this with Mitchell.
我们来这里就是要预防那种事发生
That's what we're here to prevent.
你♥爸♥爸没教你这些吗
Didn't your dad teach you any of this stuff?
他说你唯一需要的工具就是幽默感
He says the only tool you need is a sense of humor.
如果你有个很搞笑的敲门笑话
'Cause who needs the jaws of life
那还需要什么救生颚啊
if you have a good knock-knock joke?
卢克去那边拿护目镜
Luke, grab the goggles over there, please.
用心点
And try to pay attention.
我们测量两次
We measure twice,
切割一次
and we cut once.
外公你能举起180磅的杠铃吗
Hey, grandpa, can you bench 180 pounds?
我说了用心点
I just said pay attention.
加上杆子其实有205磅
And that's actually 205 with the bar.
我一会儿举给你看
I'll lift that for you later.
我知道你心里还挂念着那个
I can see you're not gonna let up about that.
没有啦
Eh, I'm okay.
瞧瞧我的
Spot me.
如果大事不妙
Now, if this thing goes south,
你要打给911
I want you to call 911
告诉乔他的老爸死得光荣
and tell Joe his old man died as he lived --
救了一火车人
saving a trainload of people.
好了这几下够了
All right. That's enough for now.
告诉我你对女人的一切了解
Tell me everything you know about women.
是啊最后一句
Yeah, that last thing.
有趣有趣有趣
Funny. Funny. Funny.
我一定没跟上你们
I must be a little behind you guys.
他说的话
His words.
你感受到发生的事了吗
Do you feel what's happening here?
-我觉得好痛 -不是
- I feel pinching. - No.
我是这个超级组合里的薄弱环节
I'm the weak link of this super group.
他们知道我也知道
They know it and I know it.
我们都在一大堆人中还没关系
It's fine when we're all in a big group,
但是一旦我们单独相处
but once we're separated from the herd,
我就露马脚了
the hooves come out.
你说的应该是爪子吧
Don't you mean "Claws"?
有爪子的动物不成"堆"活动米奇尔
Clawed animals don't travel in herds, Mitchell.
得用"群"称呼
Packs, flocks, and prides.
我们为什么不能去农场
Why can't we be on a farm?
我会让你们觉得相形见绌的
I'd make you all look like such idiots.
知道吗
You know what?
我就去外面等着好了
I'm just gonna wait outside.
不小卡别这样
Wh-- no. Cam, come on.
你这样太蠢了
You're being silly.
老实说
To be perfectly honest,
我真的需要小卡留下来
I-I really needed Cam to stay.
他一走
The minute he goes,
我就成笨蛋了
I'm the dumb one.
我上过一次艺术史课
I-I took an art history class once,
但那只是为了看一群赤♥裸♥的意大利男人
but that was just to look at naked Italian dudes, so...
记住
Remember now,
你身处零度以下的气温中
you're in subzero temperatures.
唯一让你觉得温暖的
The only thing keeping you warm
就是激♥情♥燃烧的热度
is the heat of your fiery passion.
开始
And...go!
我美丽的贝丝
My beautiful Beth --
-再冷一点 -我美美美丽的贝贝丝
- Colder! - My b-b-beautiful B-Beth.
-再冷一点 -贝贝贝贝...
- Colder! - B-B-B-B--
太冷了
That's too cold.
太冷了
That's too cold.
贝贝贝丝
B-B-Beth!
就是这样
Now we're talking!
我觉得你好美
You're so beautiful to me!
太棒了
Yes!
我为什么这么想帮安迪
Why am I so intent on helping Andy?
我喜欢拍电影和爱情
I love filmmaking and I love love.
你可以说我喜欢拍摄爱情[在电影里做♥爱♥]
I guess you could say I enjoy making love on film,
现在我不用自己做了
and now I don't have to do it by myself.
贝丝我从远方说想你
Beth, this is my long way of saying I miss you.
不是我说这太别扭了
Th-- uh. You know, this is weird.
我都不知道该看哪里
I don't really know where to look.
不不别扭
No, it's not weird.
深情地看着我的双眼感动我
J-just look deep into my eyes and sweep me off my feet.
好吧
All right.
亲爱的
Honey...
没错这太别扭了
Yeah, that's weird.
是的
It is. Yeah.
海莉亲爱的帮帮我们吧
Haley, honey, can you help us?
没人帮得了你们
I don't think anyone can.
让安迪给你公主抱
Just let Andy hold you "Officer and a gentleman" style,
我在电脑上把贝丝的脸叠加在你脸上
and I'll superimpose Beth's face over yours on the computer.
这太扯了
That's insane.
我知道我用这个无所不能
I know. I can do anything with this.
要是她觉得别扭
If she's not comfortable
告诉你们吧
You know what, guys?
这事真的太可悲了
This whole thing is really sad and pathetic.
女孩们都不喜欢男人这么主动
No girl wants a guy that tries this hard.
要是我收到这么个视频
If I got this video,
我会报♥警♥的
I'd call the police.
有的女孩会喜欢对她们好的男人
Some girls actually like guys who are nice to them.
有的女孩会喜欢36个那样的男人
Some girls like 36 of them.
有37个
There's 37 of them!
好了就要这种激♥情♥
Okay, this is passion.
可以利用起来
We can use it.
安迪抱她起来
Andy, pick her up.
来吧把这条搞定
All right, let's just get this over with.
天啊他真的把我抱起来了爸爸
Oh, my gosh, he's actually picking me up! Dad!
马上就好
It's just for a minute.
现在注视着对方
Now lock eyes and...
开拍
Action.
亲爱的我从远方说想你
Honey, this is my long way of saying I miss you.
我不必爬上高山
I don't have to climb a mountain
不必远过重洋去见你
or swim an ocean to be with you,
因为你一直在我身边
'cause you're always with me--
在我的脑海里
in my thoughts,
我的梦里
my dreams...
我的心里
my heart.
我值得我用尽所有的能力去爱你
You deserve more than I could possibly ever give you,
可你就是我的全部
but everything I have is yours.
我爱你
I love you.
停
Cut!
太美了
That was beautiful.
我真的感觉到了
I really felt that one.
你感觉到了吗
Did you feel that one?
我什么都没感觉到
No, I didn't feel anything.
我在问安迪
I was talking to Andy.
我知道放我下来变♥态♥
I know! Put me down, freak!
真让我怀念啦啦队的日子
That really takes me back to my cheerleading days.
一个承受着那么多痛苦的人
How could a guy with so much pain
是如何创作出这么充满希望的作品的