摩登家庭
Modern Family S05E24
Part 1
Nov. 29, 2019, 12:32 p.m.
喂 伴郎
Hey, best man.
《摩登家庭》前情提要
是啊 我也觉得你应该叫我"伴人"
Yeah, I think I might go with "Best person."
又是老妈的事吗 我说过了 我没事
Is this about mom again? I told you, I'm fine.
我只是有点同情你
I was just a little sad for you.
老妈爽约了
Mom's a no-show,
你和老爸又几乎不说话
and you and dad are hardly even speaking.
我要抛弃你
I'm leaving you!
但我要先抛弃你
Not if I leave you first!
你干了什么
What did you do?!
注意 各位请注意
Attention! Attention, please!
大火已经漫过高速了
The fire has jumped the freeway.
等等 等等等等
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
如果你们要疏散整个区域
If you're evacuating the whole area,
能不能最后疏散我们
can't you just do us last?
恐怕你们还没意识到
I don't think you realize
你们离实际火源有多近
how close you are to actual flames.
你好 我是胡娇·萨茨曼
Hello. Pepper Saltzman.
你们的忠实粉丝
Big supporter of yours.
我收藏了你们所有的年历
Have all your calendars.
我们已经等了10年
We've waited 10 years.
能给我们一个小时吗
Can we please have an hour?
只能给你们30分钟
I can give you 30 minutes.
那样就够了
We can make that work!
婚礼稍微简化 继续进行
The wedding will go on just in a slightly pared-down version.
克莱尔 你到前面去
Claire, you're up front.
花童 撒花去
Flower girl, strewing.
新郎们 跟我来
Grooms, come with me.
他们看起来好帅啊
"Ooh! Ahh! They look so handsome!"
四重唱 四重唱 四重唱
Quartet, quartet, quartet!
萨尔该你了 五行打油诗就别念了
And cue Sal. Start after your limerick.
天呐 不
Oh, God, no!
我们都得牺牲一些 亲爱的
Ugh! We're all making sacrifices, dear.
我那还有一车的帝王蝶
I have a Prius full of monarch butterflies
看来是要跟我回家了
who are apparently coming home with me.
不是吧
Aah! No!
她羊水破了
Her water broke!
不 没有破 我才刚刚怀孕
No! No, it did not! I am barely pregnant!
感谢各位莅临这个大喜的日子
Thank you all for being here on this joyous occasion.
曾有一个基佬名叫塔克
There once was a homo named Tucker --
萨尔 快停下 不行 你要分娩了
Sal, stop. No, you're going into labor!
行行好 快停下吧
Also, just stop!
但我们才在一起四个月啊
But we've only been together four months.
我太爱你了
I just love you so much,
迫不及待想要生出你的孩子
I can't wait to have your baby.
天呐 孩子把一切都毁了
God! Kids ruin everything!
是啊 没错
Yeah, they sure do.
我带你去医院 生下我们的奇迹宝宝吧
Let's get you to the hospital and have our miracle baby.
好
Okay.
只是要告知你一下
Just so you know,
有时这么早产的孩子
sometimes when babies come this early...
生出来是黑皮肤的
...they're black.
彻底灾难了
Okay, this is a disaster!
没人为我们证婚了
We have no one to marry us!
亲爱的人们 这确实是个问题
Dearly beloved, that is a problem.
是啊
Yep.
感谢35美元和互联网
Thanks to $35 and the internet,
您现在看到的是
you are looking at
好牧师菲利普·汉弗莱·邓菲
the good reverend Phillip Humphrey Dunphy.
去年一整年 我都在向米奇和小卡暗示
Over the last year, I've dropped a few subtle hints
我也可以当婚礼主持
to Mitch and Cam that I was available.
你们决定让谁做主婚人了吗
Hey, have you guys decided who's gonna officiate your wedding?
我在网上获得牧师资格了
'cause I got ordained online.
天呐 那儿有小袋鼠
Oh, my God. A wallaby!
天呐
Oh, my gosh!
未完待续
To be continued!
菲尔 你真是大救星 谢谢你
Phil, you're a lifesaver. Thank you.
不必感谢
No thanks necessary.
卡梅隆 为你证婚[娶你]
Cameron, marrying you would
让我成了世上最幸福的男人
make me the happiest man on earth.
各位 请注意
Everyone, attention, please!
消防队长刚通知我
I've been informed by the fire chief
我们得马上撤离
we need to leave immediately!
-风向变了 -什么
- The winds have shifted! - What?
但我们有30分钟的啊
But w-we have 30 minutes!
一个婚庆策划同事通知我
A fellow wedding facilitator has informed me
有个美丽的场地刚刚空出来了
a beautiful space just became available.
大家都去摆渡车那里
To the shuttles!
但我们完全不了解那地方的情况
But we don't know a thing about this place.
我的错
Oh, my mistake.
我们快速了解一下
Let's go over it.
那是个古雅充满田园风情的地方
It's a quaint, rustic spot,
但其主要卖♥♥点是
though its chief selling point
那里不会变成烧窖
is it's not about to become a kiln!
大家都去摆渡车那里
To the shuttles!
小卡 把大家从停车场
Cam, where are the shuttles
载到山上的摆渡车都哪儿去了
that brought everyone up from the parking lot?
显然是有别人也订了
Apparently they were double booked.
胡娇已经尽力了
This is the best Pepper could do.
我们就让大家这样去婚礼会场吗
This is how we're getting everyone to the wedding?
我们有一半的来宾是基佬
Half our guests are gay.
他们终于可以有一次
We're finally giving them
不受欺负的校车回忆了
a good memory on a school bus.
那边没有完全缝好
That doesn't look completely sewn on.
你最好找个东西遮一下
You might want to get something to cover that.
好主意
Oh, good idea.
谢谢
Thank you.
你跟莫尔说了什么让他想抛弃巴布
What did you say to Merle that make him want to leave Barb?
我不知道啊
I have no idea!
我们闲聊而已
We were just shooting the breeze --
聊婚礼 迪迪
Wedding day, DeDe,
还有娶了你我有多幸福
how happy I am now that I'm with you.
你为什么要说那些
Why would you say something like that?
你这样可伤透了某人的心
Now you're breaking somebody's heart.
我没想伤害巴布
I didn't mean for her to get hurt.
不是巴布 是莫尔 当他意识到
Not her, him when he realizes
不是每个人的第二任妻子都能有这种身材
that not every second wife looks like this.
谢谢你把外套借给我 杰
Thank you for lending me your jacket, Jay.
知道这世上还有绅士 我很欣慰
It's good to know there are still gentlemen in the world.
是你啊 巴布
Oh, it's you, Barb.
我的美好未来在前方闪耀
I didn't see you there on account of
我都没注意到你
my bright future.
谢谢你 歌♥洛莉亚
Thank you, Gloria.
勇敢抵抗那个老混♥蛋♥[山羊]
Standing up to that old goat
是我做过最棒的事
was best thing I ever did.
那是怎么回事
What's all that about?
不不 是她跟我讲的一个山羊的故事
No, no. The thing is that she told me a story about a goat
山羊很老了 后来这只山羊
and it's very old and then the goat --
别糊弄我
Oh, don't give me that.
我让她勇敢表达自己
I told her to express herself.
我相信一段和谐的婚姻中
I believe that in a good marriage,
女人能够表...
a woman can ex--
好吧 无所谓 我来解决
Fine. Whatever. I'll undo it.
我们不能让小卡知道他父母的情况
We can't let Cam know what the situation with his parents is.
他非常敏感的
He's very delicate.
难以相信 我竟然
I can't believe I'm involved
又一次参与了破坏他人婚姻的事
in breaking up yet another marriage.
什么
What?
你还好吗
Hey, hey. How you holding up?
不是很好
Uh, I've had better days.
但你跟我 我们没事吧
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