我是僵尸

iZombie S03E13

Part 5 April 30, 2020, 9:52 a.m.

全州温度最低的地方是哪里森尼赛德[阳光]
The coldest place in the state? Sunnyside!
很讽刺吧
Irony, anyone?
最高气温为零下14摄氏度
They'll reach a high of six degrees today.
我们在这里看到的急流将会继续停留在...
The jetstream that we're seeing here is staying...
新来的天气预报妹子你觉得她怎么样
So, the new weather girl... What do you think?
-美味 -死狗
- Scrumptious. - Oh, you dog.
-你的头发怎么了强尼 -什么意思
- What's going on with your hair, Johnny? - What do you mean?
漏出白发了你自己染了吗
The white streak. You try to dye it yourself?
小姐
Miss.
小姐我们正在直播你不能...
Miss. We're live right now. You can't just...
我们得谈谈
We need to talk.
你是奥利维亚·摩尔吗还戴着假发
Is that Olivia Moore? In a wig?
这次又是什么是
And what is it this time?
当地24小时按♥摩♥院发生凶案了吗
Murder at the local all-night massage parlor?
你在盘问那些惯犯
You're rounding up the usual suspects?
我知道你为什么饿以及你想吃什么
I know why you're starving and what you're starving for.
让我们单独聊聊
A little privacy, please.
你想吃别人的脑子
You want to eat someone's brain.
想想就让你咽口水
The thought of it makes you salivate.
插播广♥告♥ 强尼
And we're in commercial. Johnny...
出什么事了
What's going on down there?
为什么
Why?
为什么大脑现在听起来这么棒
Why do brains sound so good?
因为你现在是个僵尸了
Because you're a zombie now.
我也是
I'm one, too.
只要注射了阿留申流感病毒的人都变成了僵尸
Everyone who gets an Aleutian flu vaccine becomes one.
这...
This just...
那不可能的
That can't be true.
这是大脑糊
Brain mush.
很恶心吧
Gross, huh?
尝尝
Be my guest.
你要这么说
So here's what you've got to say...
突发新闻
欢迎回来我是强尼·弗罗斯特
And we're back. I'm Johnny Frost.
各位西雅图市民我要播报一则重大新闻
Fellow Seattle residents, I have grave news to report.
今天每位接种
It has come to light that every person
阿留申流感疫苗的人
who received the Aleutian flu vaccination today
都正在变成
is now in the process of becoming...
僵尸
A zombie.
我强调这是真的
I can't stress this enough. This is real.
这不是开玩笑
This is not a joke.
你们的未来取决于你接下来的行动
Your future may depend on what you do next.
如果你还没有接种阿留申疫苗不要接种
If you have not received an Aleutian flu shot, do not get one.
如果你接种了你也会变成僵尸
If you do, you too will become a zombie.
你标称僵尸的第一个标志是
The first sign you have turned into a zombie
你会开始渴望人脑
will be a craving for human brains.
那是真的吗
Is that serious?
你的皮肤会开始褪色
Color will drain from your skin.
你的头发会变成白色
Your hair will begin to turn white.
如果你已经接种了疫苗请注意
If you have taken the vaccine, also be aware
僵尸病毒会通过抓挠或性行为传播
the zombie virus can be transmitted via a scratch, or sexually.
准备二号♥摄像机
Ready camera two.
避孕套无法阻止病毒传播
Condoms do not prevent the transmission of the virus.
只有禁欲是唯一的保护措施
Abstinence is the only protection.
二号♥摄像机
Camera two.
梅格西雅图市民
The most important thing
要牢记的最重要一点是
for every Seattleite to remember is this,
这些人仍然是你的朋友
these people are still your friends,
你的邻居你所爱的人
your neighbors, your loved ones.
他们只是接触到了一种病毒
They have simply contracted a virus.
那些接触到僵尸病毒的人
Those who have contracted the zombie virus,
请抵抗你们的欲望
resist your urges.
救援已经在路上
Help is on the way.
在此之前请大家保持冷静
Until then, everyone, please stay calm.
枪♥支♥弹♥药♥
让开让开
Move! Move!
我拿了
I got this.
我拿到了走
I got it. Move!
谁去接一下电♥话♥
Someone answer the damn phones!
太棒了强尼你很棒
That was great, Johnny, you were perfect.
-想想他当初清醒的话会怎么样 -算了吧
- Imagine if he'd been sober. - Let's not.
每个地方台都在转播了
Every local station has picked up the story.
至少不是只有我们孤军奋战
Well, at least it's not just us with our wangs hanging out.
推特上说在45街消防局
We're seeing tweets that people were crushed
排队接种疫苗的人
trying to get out of the vaccination queue
-逃离时产生踩♥踏♥事♥故♥ -派人去
- at the 45th Street fire station. - Send a crew.
现在怎么办
What now?
我不知道
I don't know.
你们不能进去
You can't go in there!
-不好意思 -怎么回事
- Excuse me... - What fresh hell?
我就知道
I should've known.
先生你和你的士兵请离开本台
Sir. You and your armed men need to leave my stage.
你是我们的人了你应该欢迎我们
You're one of the tribe now. You should welcome me.
你为什么要这么做
Why are you doing this?
制♥造♥更多僵尸你们是想引发末日吗
Making more zombies? You want an apocalypse?
我这有段视频能解释一切
I have a video here that should explain everything.
你们要播放这则视频
You're going to run this on air.
抱歉我没必要听你的
Sorry, I don't take orders from you.
你们谁听我的
Any of you take orders?
大家好我叫菜斯·格拉夫
Hello. I'm Chase Graves,
菲尔莫格拉夫公♥司♥的首席运营官
chief operating officer at Fillmore-Graves.
很多人都知道
As most of you know,
我们是驻扎在西雅图的军事承包公♥司♥
we are a Seattle-based military contracting firm.
但你们很多人不知道的是
What most of you don't know is
这两年里
that for the better part of two years,
我们大部分员工
most of our support staff
和所有士兵都变成了僵尸
and all of our soldiers have been zombies.
有人会觉得这是个不幸的消息
Some would say that's the bad news.
我并不觉得
I don't see it that way,
我们明白这一新的状况
though we understand that this new reality
可能会对一些恋情是严峻的考验
may test the bonds of some romantic relationships.
不幸的是人类和僵尸亲密接触
Unfortunately, intimate contact between humans and zombies
必定会让人类感染上病毒
is impossible without infecting the human partner.
我们欢迎新的僵尸
We welcome new zombies,
但只欢迎愿意与我们沟通交流的新成员
but that should be a conversation between consenting adults.
往好的一方面看
On a positive note,
到明天结束之前
by the end of the day tomorrow,
阿留申流感将会根绝
the Aleutian flu will be eradicated.
被病毒折磨得痛苦不堪
Your loved ones who were facing
濒临死亡的爱人都将被拯救
a long and painful demise will be saved,
再也没有疾病会威胁到他们的生命
and no disease will ever threaten them again.
我想大家想的第一个问题都会是
I suspect the number one question on everyone's mind is,
僵尸要从哪里搞到赖以生存的脑子
where will zombies get the brains they need to survive?
别担心
Rest assured.
我们不会从活人身上获取大脑
There are no plans to harvest brains from the living.
我们将从全美各地收♥购♥大脑
Rather, our brains will come to us from across America.
我们的大脑都是死者生前同意捐赠的
The brains, supplied to us by willing donors upon their deaths,
我们经过处理后将分发到西雅图僵尸手中
will be processed and distributed to Seattle's zombie population.
我们向全市人♥民♥保证
But here's the promise we're making to the rest of the country.
给我们提供赖以生存的大脑
Provide us the brains that we need to survive,
我们会留在西雅图
and Seattle is where we'll stay.
全美每天都有七千多人死亡
In the United States, 7,000 people die every day.
如果十个人中有一个人愿意捐出他的大脑
If just one person in 10 donates his brain,
就足以支撑我们生存无需另找食物
we will have enough that we won't need to look elsewhere.
毕竟如果僵尸饿了
Should zombies go hungry, however,
大家都猜得到他们会变成什么样
it's anybody's guess where they might turn.
记住吃饱了的僵尸是快乐的僵尸
Remember, a well-fed zombie is a happy zombie.
我们真切希望
And our genuine hope
西雅图能成一个充满快乐的僵尸的城市
is that seattle will be a city filled with happy zombies.
参加教师协会
Going to PTA meetings,
给孩子的足球赛带橙子
bringing orange slices to kids' soccer matches,