我是僵尸

iZombie S03E10

Part 1 April 30, 2020, 9:51 a.m.

《我是僵尸》前情提要
Previously on iZombie...
看看我在恐吓信里找到了什么
Look, what I found in my hate mail.
如果你想找人倾诉你还有我肖娜
"If you ever need a sympathetic ear, I've got two. Shawna."
她长得不赖
She's cute.
这种蓝色液体会让僵尸幻象更持久更强烈
This blue juice makes zombie visions longer and more intense.
如果按计划进行的话
And if all goes according to plan,
会让我们赚大钱
it's going to make us a lot of money.
哈利和他的人都在猎杀僵尸
Harley and his people are targeting zombies.
我们被邀请
I landed us an invite
参加僵尸挖掘者大会了
to the zombie truthers meeting tomorrow night.
我们要抓住一只僵尸
We're gonna capture a zombie.
让全世界看看它成了什么样的怪物
Let the whole world see the monster it becomes!
你要在西雅图待多久
How long are you gonna be in Seattle?
把我的钱拿回来要清债务就行
Just long enough to get my money and settle some old debts.
妻子还是老样子
嫁给一个人三十年
You're married to someone for 30 years.
精打细算到处节省
You scrimp, and you save.
还存了一笔储备金
And you build up a nest egg, and then they die,
然后突然就没了
and the nest egg is nowhere to be found.
黑山对没错
Montenegro? Yeah, sure.
上周他被人看到
Last week he was spotted
在一个地方苹果基地
in a regional production of Pippin
供给塔科马港市运动员的
for the Tacoma Players.
我丈夫死了
My husband is dead.
最坏也会有保险金啊
Worst case, there should be insurance money.
你是我们的律师你要负责解决
Well, you're our lawyer, you figure it out!
他最好是死了我就这么想的
He'd better be dead. That's all I'm saying.
狡猾的黄鼠狼
Shifty little weasel.
别接了
Don't answer it!
又是我室友
It's my roommate again.
让我记得录电视节目
Calling to remind me to set the DVR.
别接
No!
世界上最致命的植物
World's Deadliest Plants.
纳特·吉奥未来是你的后盾老兄
Nat Geo. Tomorrow. Got you covered, bro.
不是这个听着我父母疯了
Not why I'm calling. Listen, my parents got a wild hair,
想要改他们的结婚誓言
decided to renew their wedding vows.
我爸刚刚打来电♥话♥
My dad just called,
说买♥♥了飞伦敦的机票
surprised me with a plane ticket to London.
真是太棒了
Oh, that's so freaking good.
好吧
Okay.
所以我要出去几天
So, I'll be back in a few days.
-能帮我告诉丽芙一声吗 -当然了拜拜
- Can you get word to Liv? - Totes magotes. Bye now!
那就这样
Cheers, then.
搞了几天假了
Agenda's clear for a few days.
很好扭屁♥股♥医生
Nice work, Doctor Shockterbooty.
我们要你的手♥机♥
We're gonna need that phone.
有这必要吗
Is that really necessary?
-我是自愿来的 -自愿
- I'm here of my own volition. - Volition?
他是自己要来的
His own free will.
他来是因为我们有很多短猎枪
He's here because we've a bunch of sawed-off shotguns.
我来是因为我想要研究活生生的僵尸
I'm here because I want to study a zombie in the flesh.
我相信你医生
I believe you, Doc.
但我还是希望你专注于我们的任务
But I'll still feel better if I know you're focused on
我们要知道这一点
what we're doing here, instead of...
而不是拿着手♥机♥玩游戏
Playing Candy Crush.
我明白了
I get it.
那就拿着我的手♥机♥吧
Keep my phone, then.
我得...
I should, uh...
去查看一下他
Go check on him.
看看我们
Look at us now.
已经抓住了怪物
We've got our exotic animal,
还是强人和杂技演员一体呢
strongman and sideshow all in one.
挪挪我们的巴纳姆贝利马戏团
Move over Barnum & Bailey.
我们要贡献全球最伟大的表演了
We're about to put on the greatest show on earth.
开端
感染
转变
前任未婚夫
最好的朋友
同盟
工作
搭档
但我是僵尸
我想让唐·E镇静一下
心率平稳每分钟十下
Heart rate holding steady at 10 beats per minute.
明白
Copy.
看看我们有广角摄像
Lookie here. We got your wide shot
还有大特写要什么都有
but also your extreme close-up, mess-yourself money shot.
世界上所有研究僵尸的人
And anyone around the world doing a search
-都可以找到我们吗 -没错
- for zombies will find us? - That's right.
我要饿坏我们的贵宾
We're gonna starve out our guest of honor
让他为我们疯狂
until he goes all gnarly on us,
向全世界证明僵尸是存在的
prove to the world that zombies are for real.
他不会做出精彩动作的
He ain't doing anything worth watching.
我们来引导一下
Let's rectify that.
刺刺他应该会让他活跃起来
A cattle prod to the nards ought to liven him up,
让他像在车里一样血管爆出双目血红
get him all veiny and red-eyed like he was in the van.
太早了现在还没人看
Too soon. Nobody's watching yet.
这样
I tell you what.
我们一达到十万点击量
We hit 100,000 views,
就狠狠地让他表演起来
we'll light him up like a Christmas tree.
听到了吗僵尸别太舒服了
Hear that, Zombie? Don't get too comfortable.
我这就过来
I'm coming for you!
巴拉克斯在枪击案中勇气可嘉
看看这张巴拉克斯从狙击手的枪口下
Check out this photo of Baracus protecting his son
保护他儿子的照片
from sniper's bullets.
"巴拉克斯在枪击案中勇气可嘉"
"Baracus shows courage under fire."
他可能会成为西雅图史上第一个僵尸市长
He could end up being the first zombie mayor of Seattle.
有枪手的线索吗
That say anything about leads on the shooter?
没有
Nope.
你今天会去办公室吗
Are you going into the office today?
-为什么 -只是好奇
- Why? - General interest.
你想独处
You want to know if you can have the place to yourself.
你瞎猜
Your words.
你有自己的房♥间啊
You know, you have your own room.
难道僵尸滚床单声音特别大吗
Is zombie sex particularly loud?
会怒吼会咆哮吗
What with the groaning and growling?
我只是问问你去不去办公室而已
All I'm asking is if you're going into the office.
之前贾斯丁的事怎么说
How are things on the Justin front?
你真是太危险了
I mean you're highly-critical.
你就因为一个人的脸让你发笑就和他分手了
You broke up with a guy once because his O-face made you laugh.
你是没见过啊
If you had seen it, ugh!
至于贾斯丁我不知道
And on the Justin Front, I wouldn't know.
我们还没...
We haven't...
我明白你为什么想独处了
I see why you want the place to yourself.
好吧
Okay. Well, um...
如果我能给你提供更好的呢
What if I can make you a better offer?
我不想让你被侮辱
I don't want you to be insulted
别以为我没考虑过
and don't think I haven't considered it,
但我必须和他们保持联♥系♥
but I'm going to stick with men.
好吧那这样
Okay, here's the deal.
你什么时候想独处都行
I'll clear out any night you want
只要你帮我一个小小的忙
as long as you'll do me one teensy-weensy favor today.
-我听着呢 -詹姆斯·维克勒
- I'm listening... - James Weckler...
那个施虐女王的凶手
The dominatrix killer. Yeah.
他的大脑现在正在太平间里
His brain is currently marinating
拉维的蓝色溶液中泡着
in Ravi's blue juice down at the morgue.
已经泡好可以开吃了
It's ripe and ready to go.
-不别让我 -拜托
- No, don't make me... - Please.
他的供述来得太容易你甚至都这么说过
His confession came too easy. You even said it yourself.
他的律师接受了认罪协议
His lawyer accepted a terrible plea deal.
种种迹象表明有邪恶的力量在暗中操控
Hinted sinister forces were at work.
丽芙我认为不是他杀的罗克珊·格里尔
Liv, I don't think he killed Roxanne Greer.
好你想让我找到
Okay. You want me to find evidence
推♥翻♥克莱夫和我找到的维克勒案子的证据
that tears apart the case Clive and I made against Weckler.
-没错 -你想让我进入
- Yes. - You want me to live inside the brain of a guy