我是僵尸

iZombie S05E01

Part 1 April 30, 2020, 8:21 a.m.

六个月后
你喜欢喝根啤吗
You like root beer?
不太喜欢
Not really.
我觉得根啤好像还有点
'Cause I think we got some root beer.
柜台后面有些芝士泡芙
Got some Hellfire Cheesy Puffs behind the counter.
想要吗
Interested?
不了谢谢一杯这个就好
No, thanks. Just... Just this.
其实是骗你的
It was a trick question anyway.
我不卖♥♥那些垃圾们东西
I don't sell Hellfire nothing.
去他们的懂我说的是谁吧僵尸们
Screw 'em, know what I mean? Zombies.
你怎么知道我不是僵尸
How do you know I'm not a zombie?
因为你没有像吸牡蛎一样
'Cause you ain't sucking my brain out of its skull
把我的脑子从脑壳里吸出来
like I'm a damn oyster.
夜还长
The night's young.
你差点骗到我 "夜还长"
You almost had me there, "The night's young."
我差点就要信了
I was almost buying it.
但僵尸是不会进来的
But zombies don't come in here.
他们知道好歹
They know what's good for 'em.
为什么这么说
What makes you say that?
菲尔莫尔格拉夫让我们囤美黑乳液
Fillmore-Graves makes us stock self-tanning lotion,
一瓶也不卖♥♥出去
and we ain't sold one of 'em.
僵尸知道自己在这不受欢迎
Zombies know they ain't welcome here.
这家伙可不是开玩笑的
This here homie don't play.
僵尸的气数快尽了
Time's nearly up for zombies.
我可以跟你说
That I can tell you.
我们不会安于当人♥质♥
We ain't gonna keep letting ourselves be hostages.
这是肯定的
That's for damn sure.
急什么
What's the hurry?
又没地方可去
Ain't no place to go.
我们都被困在这方圆15英里之内了
All of us is stuck in these 15 square miles.
僵尸贱♥人♥
Zombie bitch.
我是僵尸
第五季第一集
大脑短缺
真伤心
Sad.
这是停尸房♥里最后一点脑子
The last portion of brains in the morgue,
可能也是西雅图的最后一点
if not all of Seattle.
断指巴恩斯
Thumb-breaker Barnes.
我这五天脑子里都是你现在你要消失了
I spent five days with you in my head, and now that you're gone,
我宁愿你永远小时
I'd rather you stay gone.
你是个讨厌的人干着讨厌的工作
You were an unpleasant man with an unpleasant job.
你把一个老太太吊死在阳台上就因为她
You dangled an old lady off her balcony because she, what,
不尊重你
disrespected you?
听说过愤怒管理吗
Ever heard of anger management?
也许你才应该听听舒缓的鲸鱼声
Maybe you should've tried soothing whale sounds.
但我被惯坏了
But I'm spoiled.
我很少需要像市里的
I rarely have to choke down brain tubes
其他僵尸一样吃管装脑
like every other zombie in the city.
红酒
Wine.
丽芙丽芙开始了
Liv! Liv, it's happening.
当我昨天更想吃
I should've known last night
那个送披萨的人而不是披萨本身的时候
when I was more interested in eating the pizza guy
我就应该明白
than the pizza itself.
我的大姨夫
My monthlies.
谢谢你上帝你真好
Thank you, Grace. For being this kind,
我将永远是您卑微的仆人
I'll be forever your humble servant.
那是我的
That was mine.
我收回刚才的话
I take it all back.
不管这是谁真美味
Whoever this was, delicious.
那是断指巴恩斯
It was Thumb-breaker Barnes.
谁看起来比较好呢
Who looks good?
就你吧
Oh, yeah.
马拉松运动员
我打算去游个泳
I'm going for a swim.
等我回来别让我看见你们
Don't be here when I get back.
实际上
Actually,
有马拉松运动员的脑子今晚回来十点钟吧
marathoner brain. Come back tonight, say 10:00?
带点朋友来
Bring friends.
别带胖子
No fatties.
你得搞明白这一点
Get this through your head.
布莱恩是金刚
Blaine is King Kong
而我们其余人连骷髅岛岛民都算不上
and the rest of us are merely Skull Island natives.
别问为什么
Don't ask why.
就去告诉女孩们周二双飞不是谣传
Just go tell the girls that Twofer Tuesdays is a real thing
巨猩金刚制定的真实条例
decreed by the mighty Kong.
记住了唐·E
Remember, Don E,
是美女杀死了野兽
't was Beauty killed the Beast.
没错还有更糟的办法
Yeah, well, there are worse ways to go.
-一切还好吗 -实际上...
- Everything okay? - Actually...
实际上一切都好得很
Actually, things are better than okay.
好得不得了糖糖正要走
They're the hunky-doriest. Candy was just leaving.
我们有麻烦了
We got problems.
所以我们才更是连出的专辑
So we're more like hunky-dory adjacent?
那视频简直惨不忍♥睹兄弟
It's a train wreck, that video, man.
那个视频简直要了我们的命
That video is killing us.
什么视频
What video?
你过去48小时去哪了
Where have you been the past 48 hours?
你和我在短♥信♥里给你说的那些律师谈过了吗
Did you talk to those lawyers I texted you about?
他们是扬-威林律师事务所的吗
Were they from the firm of Young & Willing?
过来我们有客人来
Come here. We got company.
什么视频唐·E
What video, Don E?
便利店的监控摄像头
Convenience store surveillance cam
拍到两个僵尸在撕咬某位
caught a couple of zombies ripping apart some lady
很不明智地撞上他们车的女士
who had the bad sense to bump into their hooptie.
那这和我们有什么关系
And what's that got to do with us?
原来人类很不喜欢看到某种
Turns out, humans don't like seeing men of a certain
"肤色"的男人撕咬善良的人类女性
"complexion" chowing down on nice human ladies.
谁知道呢
Who knew?
所以人类正在收集叉子和火把吗
So humans are gathering their pitchforks and their torches?
你知道他们会怎么样
You know how they get.
有六个特别需要我们担心的人类
It's six humans in particular who should concern us.
就是我们从南方渠道走私大脑时
It's the six Border Patrol agents
花钱让他们睁一只眼闭一只眼的
who we pay to look the other way
那六个边境巡逻员
when we're smuggling brains through the south channel.
我猜他们过去认为僵尸本质上还不错
I guess they used to think that zombies were essentially decent.
有些的确不错
Some are.
现在他们见过自己的同类
Well, now that they've seen one of their own womenfolk
被挖空脑子的过程
put through debraining process,
我们没法花钱让他们无视
we can't pay them enough to ignore it.
所以是谁来了
So who's here?
想想世界上所有你愿意见到的人
Think of all the people in the world you'd enjoy seeing.
都不是
It's none of them.
他们请我让两个人类出城
They're petitioning me to let two humans out of the city
-参加舞蹈比赛吗 -对
- for a dance contest? - Mm-hmm.
一生难得的跳舞机会
Dance of a lifetime.
不行我不会让人类出去跳舞的
No, I'm not letting humans out to dance.
制♥作♥人说他们会在每集给我们一分钟
Producers say they'll give us a one-minute commercial spot
广♥告♥时间
in each episode.
要广♥告♥什么
To advertise what?
我们的旅游业很消沉
Our tourism's way down.
指挥官
Commander.
欢迎欢迎
Welcome. Welcome.
布莱恩
Blaine.
好久不见老朋友
It's been too long, old friend.
我真的希望你是叫我出来玩
I really do hope this is a social call.
可惜不是
Sadly, no.
我今天早上接到了大脑工厂的电♥话♥
I got a call from the brain plant this morning
有一些令人困扰的事情
with some disturbing news.
他们告诉你了
They told you, then.
我们生活在一个被隔离的
That we live in a quarantined city
面临着自我毁灭和种族灭绝的城市里
teetering between self-destruction and annihilation?
我们这周少送了1200份大脑
We delivered 1,200 fewer brains this week.
是的