闺蜜离婚指南（2014）
Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce
第二季
剧集 | 闺蜜离婚指南（2014） | 导航列表
闺蜜离婚指南（2014）
Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce S02E07
Part 1
April 6, 2021, 10:13 a.m.
《闺蜜离婚指南》前情提要
Previously on "Girlfriends' guide to divorce"...
爸爸和贝卡的孩子就要出生了
Daddy and Becca are having a baby.
我简直不知道你在说什么
I don't know what you're talking about.
老爸把他的阴♥茎♥插到了贝卡的阴♥道♥里
Dad stuck his penis in Becca's vagina.
我下周开始要去圣玛丽了
I start SMC next week.
你上什么课
What are you taking?
性别大讲堂 我是哈珀教授
Gender Now. I am Professor Harper.
你父母一定很高兴
I'm sure that your parents are glad
你终于甩了你没用的前夫
that you finally ditched the deadbeat husband.
他们几乎闭口不提我们分手的事
They have barely mentioned our split at all.
我想了好多好主意
I have all these big ideas.
我不需要帮助 罗伯特现在是面包房♥的
I don't need help. Robert is presently a co-owner
半个主人了
Of the bakery.
我没法和你做朋友
I can't be friends with you
因为我想跟你做♥爱♥
because I want to have sex with you.
-你在干什么 -我不知道
- What are you doing? - I don't know.
但现在 这是我能做的最好的了
But right now this is the best I can do.
妈 查理尿湿了你的床
Mom, Charlie wet your bed.
他好多年没尿过床了
He hasn't done that in years.
我想可能是因为宝宝的事情
I think he's probably regressing
他又退步了
because of the baby news.
不要就是不要
第14条
妈 你穿的这是什么鞋 洞洞鞋吗
Mom, what are you wearing? Crocs?
是啊 查理让我穿的
I am. Charlie demanded it.
我已丧失活下去的勇气
I'd already lost the will to live.
那怪胎依然怪怪的吗
Weirdo still acting super weird?
是啊 他想自己一直受宠
He is. He needs constant coddling,
他后来都没睡自己床上过
and he hasn't slept in his own bed since--
自从我到爸爸那去之后吗
Since I've been at dad's?
我很难过 我应该早点回来吗
I feel bad. Should I come back early?
这不关你事
This is not about you.
是这一切的改变造成的
This is about all the changes.
那个婴儿 你♥爸♥爸的离开
This is the baby, your dad leaving.
怎么了
What's happening?
我一直都跟她有短♥信♥联络
So I've kind of been texting her--
我是说贝卡
Becca, I mean.
我喜欢她 她现在被卷进了我们的生活
I like her, and she's kind of stuck to us now.
我只是不想事情变得太难看
I just don't want it to be awkward.
我同意
I agree.
继续发短♥信♥吧 我脸色不会难看的
Text away, and I will be un-awkward.
要习惯分离监护权需要点时间
Getting used to split custody takes time.
我这周得忙起来
Well, I got to stay busy this week,
-不然就要崩溃了 -是吗
- or I am going to lose it. - Yeah?
是的 佐伊待在弗朗普阴♥茎♥家期间
Yeah. My motto while Zooey's away
-我的座右铭是 -什么
- with Frumpdick... - What?
什么都试试 放开了玩
Go big, play hard.
所以我才刻苦钻研
That is why I'm plowing through online dates
好像过时了的线上约会
like it is going out of style, baby.
我爱死了
I love it.
谁说女生不能像男生一样鬼混
Who says that girls can't fool around like guys?
不要其他
No string attached.
只要惹火调皮性感黄暴就行
Just hot, naughty, down, dirty.
迪莉娅 你怎么了
Wow, Delia. What has gotten into you?
什么 没怎么
What? Nothing.
膝盖抬高 女士们 别逼我吼你
High knees, ladies! Don't make me call you out!
乔用性释放压力
What's wrong with Jo using sex to, you know,
有什么不妥吗
release tension?
好吧 我挺焦虑 因为工作的事
Okay, I'm tense. I just--it's just with work
还有婚礼一天天临近
and the wedding's just getting closer and closer every day.
我只是真的有些不堪重负了
I'm just really-- I'm kind of overwhelmed.
让它流动 懂吗
Let it flow, you know?
把所有压力发泄出来 发泄在老鲜肉戈登身上
Let all your stress-- take it out on good, old, gordy.
最近和性感教授怎么样了
How's the hot new prof?
他要被我拿下了 妥妥的
He is so my bitch. Literally.
他约我去博物馆
He wanted to take me on a day date to MOCA--
有品
Super classy.
我精挑细选出了我的"好戏上演"战袍
I have my whole "It's on" outfit picked out.
你脱了它可以得到额外学分吗
Do you get extra credit for taking it off later?
我知道 喜欢上老师挺老套的
I know. It's super cliche-- hot for the teacher--
但我重返校园可不是为了成绩
but I'm not going back to school for grades.
我只是尽量释放我自己
I'm just trying to open myself up
让我能看清我的未来 懂吗
so my destiny can reveal itself to me, you know?
不懂 我听着有点玄乎
Not a clue. Little zen for me.
我们加快有氧踢腿的节奏
Let's get those cardio kicks into gear!
我讨厌这个
I hate these.
我想我知道你现在脑海里是谁的脸
Oh, I bet I know whose face you're picturing right now.
我虽然让沙琳接触我女儿
Yeah. I may be sharing my baby girl with Charlene,
但如果让那巫婆接触我的生意的话
but I'll be damned if I'm gonna share my business
我会死很惨
with that witch.
我下了点功夫
I did some digging.
-什么 -如果你能证明
- What? - If you can prove
Rize首♥付♥的60%来自于你收到的遗产
that your inheritance covers 60% of Rize's down payment,
弗朗普金斯就输定了
Frumpkis has no case.
面包店是你的
Bakery's yours.
迪莉娅·巴耐 你个性感小妖精
Delia Banai, you sexy little minx.
-我现在简直想舌吻你 -不用了
- I could kiss you with tongue right now. - No, no.
好了 带回家吧
All right, let's take it home!
-加把劲 -你的面包店是继承来的吗
- Knock it out! - You inherited your bakery?
说来话长
It's a long story.
我在波多黎各的姨妈有点疑神疑鬼
See, my paranoid Puerto Rican aunt,
她不相信银行
She doesn't believe in banking.
她赌博赢了这笔钱...
She won all this casino money--
抱歉 抱歉我迟到了
Sorry! Sorry I'm late.
-你去哪了 -大家 欢迎艾比
- Where have you been? - Everybody, welcome Abby.
我的天 我八岁的儿子让我给他穿衣服
Oh, my god, my eight-year-old wanted me to dress him
-像个小宝宝一样 -那挺可爱
- like he's a little baby. - Oh, that's cute.
不可爱
It's not cute.
我真庆幸他还记得怎么拉耙耙
I'm just glad he remembers he's potty-trained.
时间到
Time!
-下课 -什么
- Class over. - What?
要全力以赴啊 女士们
Kick some ass, ladies.
这什么 这是什么
What is this? What is this?
-开玩笑吗 -怎么了
- Are you kidding me? - What?
不是吧
No!
我爸妈来了 他们想跟我住
My parents are in town, and they want to stay with me.
好像我事儿还不够多似的
As if I don't have enough going on already.
挺冒犯 他们没问你吗
Rude. They didn't even ask?
没
No.
我还怎么活
How am I gonna get through this life?
-你不会有事的 -杰克三天后要走了
- You're gonna be fine. - Jake is leaving in three days.
你可以的 你会没事的
You can, and you will.
别忘了 你们 明天
Hey, don't forget, you guys-- tomorrow,
绝密约会 比佛利山庄
Super-secret appointment, Beverly Hills.
我们能帮你找婚纱吗
Are we perhaps helping you find your wedding dress?
也许可以
Perhaps.
再见
Bye.
好了 谁跟我一起
All right. Uh, who's coming with me?
-我 -好
- I will. - Okay.
我把车停哪了
Where did I park?
闺蜜离婚指南
第二季 第七集
教授
Professor?
这条裙子真美
That's quite a dress.
-叫我格雷姆就好 -好的 格雷姆
- You can just call me Graeme. - Okay, Graeme.
-我能问你点事吗 -请吧
- Can I ask you something? - Please.
如果我牙齿上有东西你会告诉我的 对吧
You'd tell me if I had something in my teeth, right?
没有 牙齿很干净
Nope. You're good.
哈珀教授 抱歉我们迟到了
Hey, professor Harper, sorry we're late.
没关系 大家都到了
All right, the gang's all here.
来吧 我们出发
Come on, let's go.
很开心见到大家 走吧
Hey, good to see you guys. Let's get going.
闺蜜离婚指南（2014）
Girlfriends' Guide to Divorce
剧集 | 闺蜜离婚指南（2014） | 导航列表