好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S04E21
Part 2
Nov. 17, 2020, 1:58 p.m.
It's one of those cuban fellas you like puffin' on.
是你喜欢"吸"的那种古巴雪茄 (fella这里暗指fellate口♥交♥)
That's sweet.Thank you.
太好了 多谢
You're very welcome.
不客气
Did you do something different with your hair?
你的头发是不是有所变化?
It looks nice. Don't get me started.
看起来不错 别让我提起这个
So, when did you find out your dad? Find out what?
那么...你什么时候发现你♥爸♥爸...? 发现什么?
That he's gay. My dad's not gay.
发现他是同性恋 我爸爸不是同性恋
You sure?My dad is.
你确定吗? 我爸爸就是
No kidding. Yep.
你确定? 没错
You smell like strawberries. It's my lip gloss.
你闻起来像草莓 是我的润唇膏
Cool.Does it taste like it smells?
酷 尝起来也是草莓味吗?
You want to find out? Sure.
你想试试吗? 当然
Can we watch a soccer game instead of basketball?
我们能不能不看篮球 看看足球?
What are you,nuts?
你疯了吗?
Sophie says soccer's the most popular sport in the world.
Sophie说足球是世界上最受欢迎的运动
Well,then they don't need us to watch it.
那他们就不需要我们看了
You know what would be a good idea?
有个好点子你知道吗?
Maple syrup lip gloss.
枫糖汁润唇膏
Your mom will be here any minute. I thought I told you to get ready.
你妈妈随时会到 我不是叫你要准备好的
I'm ready.
我是准备好了啊
Did you do your homework? No.
作业做了吗? 没有
Oh,jake,I promised your mother you would have it done.
哦 杰克 我向你妈妈保证过要你做完作业的
Well,next time,you'll know better.
那下次你就该吸取教训了
I think jake has a thing for your boyfriend's daughter.
我觉得杰克喜欢你男朋友的女儿
He's not my boyfriend. We're friends.
他不是我男朋友 我们只是朋友
Friends,huh?
朋友 是吧?
Alan,when an intelligent,successful
艾伦 当一个聪明 成功
attractive man wants to be friends with you, something's amiss.
又有魅力的男人想与你成为朋友的时候 就一定有什么地方搞错了
Excuse me,but if greg were to be interested in
恕我直言 但是如果格雷格对这里的某人...
anybody around here,it would be you.
感兴趣的话...那也会是你
Whoa,whoa,whoa,whoa. What are you talking about?
你在说什么啊
Come on Charlie, you got to admit
拜托 查理 你要承认
You put out a special kind of vibe.
你散发出一种独特的"共鸣"
You don't mean special.
你不是说独特
You mean special!
你是说"~独~特~" (同性恋腔调)
And I don'T.
而我才没有!
You're 40 years old,you've never been married
你都40岁了而从没结过婚
you play the piano,you are meticulous about your appearance...
你弹钢琴 你很讲究外表
I've got a riding crop in my bathroom
我洗手间里挂着一条马鞭却从来没碰过马
Your bathroom also has two kinds of skin moisturizer,
你洗手间里也有着两种保湿露
various hair gels,colognes,powders and emollients.
各种发胶 古龙水 香粉和润肤乳...
I only have one moisturizer.
我只有一种保湿露
The other one is a sun block with moisturizer.
另一个是防晒加保湿的
Oh,right,right.
哦 对了对了
You need that sun block for when you lean out the front door to get the paper.
你需要在打开前门弯腰取报纸的时候防晒
There's no shade out there in the morning,alan.
早上的时候那里可没有遮阳的 艾伦
Excuse me for not wanting to spend my 50s looking like a catcher's mitt.
我可不想到50岁时变得跟 接球手的手套一样皱巴巴的
All right,let's scoot away from the clinique counter for a minute...
好吧…让我们先从美容专柜前挪步
And discuss some of the people you've attracted.
来讨论一下你吸引来的某些人
Ok ok, you think of the time at the House of Blues
你想到的是那次在蓝调音乐屋 (House of Blues连锁音乐店)
And there's no way I could have known that was a guy.
我根本就不可能知道那是个男的!
He was 6'2",and could palm a medicine ball.
他身高一米八♥九♥而且能一手握住健身实心球
I was drunk,he was tucked,taped and gorgeous.
我当时喝醉了 而他男扮女装又很漂亮... (tucked and taped男扮女装,做假胸部)
Charlie,you brought home a dude in a dress.
查理 你把一个穿洋装的男人带回了家
A dude who wanted to be a woman
一个想当女人的男人
which means he was looking for a straight man
也就是说他想找一个异性恋
which is me!
也就是我
Rationalize it any way you want,
想怎么粉饰都可以
but he still sends you flowers on valentine's day.
不过他依然在情人节送你花
Only because I was a gentleman!
只是因为我那晚很绅士!
So,how was your weekend? It was okay.
那么 周末过得如何? 还不错
We went sailing. Oh,how nice.
我们去航海了 哦 真不错
What else? Nothing.
还做了什么? 没什么了
Oh,yeah.I think dad's gay now.
哦 对了 我觉得爸爸现在是个同性恋了
That was a red light,mom.
那可是红灯啊 妈妈
So,charlie,I haven't seen you in a while.
那么...查理 好久没见了
What's up?
出什么事了?
Why does something have to be up?
为什么非要有事呢?
Can't I just drop by and say hello?
我就不能顺便来打声招呼?
At $350 an hour,you can say anything you want.
350块1小时 你爱怎么说都行
Okay,well,there is something that's been kind of gnawing at me.
好吧 确实有些事在困扰着我
Well,this friend of mine... Your friend?
嗯…我的一个朋友... 朋友?
Yeah,a friend.
对 朋友
It's your money,charlie.
这可是你的钱 查理
Okay,okay,is it possible that,that,
好吧好吧 有没有可能...
I could be gay without knowing it?
我是同性恋而自己不知道?
Why do you ask?
为什么这么问?
Well,my,my brother's got this friend...
我...我弟弟有个朋友...
We're talking seven dollars a minute.
1分钟就要收7块钱!
No,no,no,no. This friend's real.
不不不 这个朋友是真的
He's gay,and apparently, I triggered his gaydar.
他是同性恋 而且很显然 我触发了他的"同性恋雷达"
I can understand that.
我能理解啊
You can?You can?
你能理解?你能?
Let me ask you something,charlie. Have you ever had sex with a men?
我问你 查理 你和男人发生过性行为吗?
No!No,absolutely not!
没有 没有!绝对没有!
All right,I copped a feel once, but I was drunk and he had breasts.
好吧 我占过一次便宜 不过我喝醉了而且他还有胸部! (cop a feel袭击女性胸部)
Hey! Jack's ready?
嘿 杰克准备好了吗?
Jake,your father's here!
杰克 你♥爸♥爸来啦!
He'll be right out. Good.
他马上就出来了 很好
So,uh,how have you been?
那么...你最近怎么样?
Good,and you? Good.
很好 你呢? 不错
Oh,come here. I'm so proud of you!
哦 抱一下 我很为你自豪呢
Uh,thanks. What did I do?
呃...多谢...我做了什么?
Oh,alan,you don't have to hide anymore.
哦 艾伦 你不用再掩藏了
Jake,told me all about you and greg,
杰克告诉了我你和格雷格的事
and I just want you to know I completely support you.
我只想告诉你 我完全支持你
Oh,oh,gee,judith... Is that him in the car?
哦哦 天啊...朱迪丝...
Gee,he's cute.Hello!
车里的就是他吗?天 他真帅呢 哈啰!
Oh,that must be his daughter.
哦 那一定是他女儿吧
I can see why jake has a crush on her.
我能看出为什么杰克喜欢她
Yeah yeah we checked on some movies.
是啊是啊 我们要去看电影
Oh,this makes so much sense.
哦 这才说得通嘛!
I can't believe I didn't see it when we were married
我真不敢相信我们结婚的时候我竟然没看出来
See what? Oh,come on,alan.
看出什么来? 哦 拜托 艾伦
You picking out my clothes,your neat fetish, the show tunes,the sex.
你帮我选衣服 你的洁癖 作秀的腔调,做♥爱♥...
There was no sex. Exactly.
我们根本就不做♥爱♥! 正是如此!
All these years you were so miserable, and look at you now.
这么多年了你惨兮兮的 现在看看你
You're...glowing.
容光焕发啊!
No no wait wait, hang on a second.
等等!
The-the reason that there was no...
我们不做♥爱♥的原因是...
Really?I'm glowing?
真的?我容光焕发?
And to think all this time I've been blaming myself bcause the marriage didn't work out.
想起那段时间我还因为婚姻失败而自责
No... I am pretty sure you are blaming me
不...我很确定你一直在责怪我
It was nobody's fault,alan.
根本不是谁的错 艾伦
I'm just so glad that you finally accepted who you really are.
我只是很高兴你终于接受了真实的自己
Hey,dad. Hey,buddy.
嘿 爸爸 嘿 伙计
Hey,sophie.
嘿 Sophie
You boys are so cute with your double dates.
你们父子还双双约会真是太可爱了
Listen Judith I almost forgot.
听着 朱迪丝... 我差点忘了
Your mother told me to tell you that she's behind you 100%.
你妈妈让我告诉你 她百分之百支持你
When did you talk to my mother?
你什么时候跟我妈谈过了?
Well,after jake told me,I called her.
杰克告诉我之后我给她打了电♥话♥
Why? We have a little bet.
为什么? 我们打了个小赌
It's not important.Okay,bye-bye!
不是什么大事…再见!
I mean,okay,I do care about my appearance.
我是说 好吧 我确实在意自己的外表
Plus,I've got mother issues and a bit of a flair for interior design.
加上我有母亲情结和室内设计的天赋...
You know,sconces,throw pillows,bric-a-brac.
你知道的 烛台 抱枕 小玩意儿...
But when it comes to penises, I am pretty clear that
但是说到小♥弟♥弟♥ 我很确定...
The only one I want winking at me is my own.
唯一一个我希望冲着我眨眼睛 的小♥弟♥弟♥是我自己的
Who are you trying to convince here, charlie,me or you?
你想说服谁呢 查理?我还是你自己?
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
剧集 | 好汉两个半（2003） | 导航列表