好汉两个半（2003）

Two and a Half Men S04E10

Part 1 Nov. 17, 2020, 1:57 p.m.

So you understand the situation?
你明白目前的状况没?
I think so.
我想是吧
Now that we're not married anymore
既然我们已经离婚了
you wanna sell my condo.
你就想把我的公♥寓♥卖♥♥了
No, no. It's our condo.
不不这是我们的公♥寓♥
I got it for us.
我是为了我们而买♥♥的
Not the smartest thing I ever did,
那可不是我做过最聪明的事
but my realestate adviser was my penis.
因为我的不动产顾问是我的老二 (根据下半身思考的动物)
Is that what they mean when they say
难道这就是他们说的
the market's gone soft?
市场疲软?
I don't think so.
我可不这么认为
My point is,
听着我的意思是
I can't afford to carry the mortgage.
我负担不起这房♥子的按揭款
But if we sell it,
可如果我们卖♥♥掉它
then we can split the profit.
那我们可以平分收益
Or I could buy you out.
或者我买♥♥下来你搬走
Do you have money?
你有钱吗?
I will after we sell.
卖♥♥了房♥子我就有钱了
Kandi, I am at the end of my rope.
我快完蛋了
If I can't get out from under these bills,
如果我付不出帐单
I may well have to declare bankruptcy.
我得宣布破产
Wow.
喔
That sounds really serious.
那好象很严重
It is. Deadly serious.
是非常严重
Well, in that case
那样的话...
wanna have sex?
想做♥爱♥吗?
What?
什么?
I'm horny, you're stressed
我很兴奋你很紧张
seems like we'd both benefit.
好象这么做对我们都有好处
Well, I am really stressed.
我真的压力很大
No, that's not gonna solve anything.
不那解决不了任何问题
Okay,
好吧
well, I'm gonna go take a shower.
我去洗个澡
Let me know if you change your mind.
如果你改变主意记得告诉我
I changed my mind.
我已经改变主意了
I either drank too much
我没有喝蒙...
or got hit by a train.
或被火车撞了
Oh, God, train.
哦我的妈啊...火车
Charlie?
查理
Oh, look.
哦看啊
It's my sweet angel come to take me to heaven.
我的宝贝天使要带我去天堂了
Don't touch me.
别碰我
I hope you're proud of yourself.
你很为自己感到骄傲吧
I didn't wake up in my own vomit,
我没有在自己的呕吐物里醒来
so, yeah, kind of.
是有点自豪
You are such a child.
你太孩子气了
Many people find
很多人认为
that to be an endearing quality.
孩子气很可爱
I'm not one of them.
我才不是呢
It would appear not.
很明显不是
We had fun last night, though, right?
昨晚很愉快吧?
Oh, terrific.
哦棒极了
What woman doesn't enjoy pleasing a man who falls asleep
什么女人不会喜欢取悦
while he's in the middle of reciprocating?
一个做♥爱♥时候睡着的男人呢?
Well, that explains why I dreamt I was kissing Abe Lincoln.
难怪梦到自己正亲着林肯呢
Uhoh. Okay. Just some underwear. No need to panic.
好吧一些内衣而已不需要惊慌
And a little bit of makeup. No biggie.
一些化妆品没什么大不了的
Running shoes, reading glasses, flannel nightgown
运动鞋眼镜法兰绒的女睡衣
and the latest issue of Modern Bride magazine.
还有最新一♥期♥的《新娘》杂♥志♥
Red alert.
红色警报
Lydia? What?
莉迪亚? 怎么了?
I couldn't help but notice that you put some of your stuff
我无意中发现你把你的东西
in one of my drawers.
放到我的抽屉里了
Yeah. Hey, you wanna come in here
嗯你想进来吗?
and make up for last night?
补偿昨晚?
Well, yeah, but I think we should talk
嗯但我们得谈谈
about this drawer thing.
关于抽屉的事情
Okay.
好的
Talk.
谈吧
Four score and seven years ago
87年前
our fathers brought forth upon this continent
我们的父辈开♥发♥了这片大♥陆♥
a new nation.
一个新的国家...
Morning.
早
That was a great shower.
刚才你真太厉害了
Yeah. You know,
嗯你知道这感觉很好
it's good when you feel dirtier coming out than you did going in.
当出来的比进去的更脏时
So, what are you doing?
你在做什么?
Just practicing.
练习练习
For what?
练习什么?
Nothing in particular.
没什么特别的
Just keeping sharp for my work.
为了保持我的专业水平
Oh, yeah, your little jingle thing.
嗯你的诗歌♥
Hard to believe that takes practice.
真不敢相信那也需要练习
Berta, I'd like some scrambled egg whites,
贝塔我想吃炒蛋
dry wheat toast and Earl Grey tea.
干全麦面包和格雷伯爵茶
Oh, yeah? Well, I'd like some new shoes,
哦是么? 那我还想要一双新鞋呢
a jetpack and a waistline.
还有喷气发动机组件和小细腰呢
You really thought she was gonna
你真认为她会
make you breakfast.
给你做早餐?
Yo, bro.
嘿老兄
Hey.
嘿
How'd it go with Kandi?
康迪还好吗?
Great. Just great.
很好她很好
Turns out we can be friends with benefits.
结果证明我们做朋友还是有好处的
Nice. And did she agree to sell the condo?
哦那不错她同意卖♥♥掉公♥寓♥了?
What?
什么?
Isn't that
难道那不是
why you went over there in the first place?
你去那里的首要任务吗?
Oh, yeah.
对啊
Son of a bitch.
贱♥人♥！
Charlie
查理
you need to talk to your maid.
你要和你的佣人谈谈
Shhshh! Keep your voice down.
嘘嘘嘘！小点声
Yeah, we don't use the Mword here.
嗯在屋里连"佣"开头的字都不说
Why not?
为什么不呢?
Because it's disrespectful.
因为那很无礼
Demeaning.
会贬低我们的身份
And wildly inaccurate.
野蛮的错误
The point is, Berta's the one who keeps this house running
问题是贝塔是这房♥子的管家
and more important, she's like family.
更重要是的她更像我们的家人
She's rude, offensive and vulgar.
她粗鲁无礼而且粗俗
Okay, exactly like family.
好吧这才更像一家人了
Fine.
好吧
See if she'll do that thing with the ice cubes
看她会不会和你做那事用小冰快
and the silk handkerchief you like so much.
和你最喜欢的丝手帕
Come on, sweetie, don't be like that.
别呀宝贝不需要那样吧
Ice cubes and a silk handkerchief?
小冰快和手帕?
You can also use a Popsicle and a necktie.
你也可以用冰棒和领带
But I do owe you a silk handkerchief.
我欠你一条丝手帕
And your water pick's kind of iffy.
你的口腔冲洗器也有点问题
And whatever you do,
无论如何
don't lick your hairbrush.
不要舔你的发刷
I'm sorry to come over here and bother you again.
很抱歉又来打扰你
We never finished talking about selling the condo.
可还没讨论完卖♥♥掉公♥寓♥的事
But I don't wanna sell the condo.
我不会卖♥♥掉这公♥寓♥
I can see boats from here.
从这能看到很多船
I understand, but I can't afford the payments.
我明白可我负担不起房♥子的按揭
I like boats.
可我喜欢船
All right, well if you won't
好吧那么如果你不想...
cooperate I'll just have to
你不合作我只能