好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S04E06
Part 1
Nov. 17, 2020, 1:56 p.m.
Here we are.
我们到了
Be it ever so humble.
房♥子有点简陋
Wow, this is some house.
哇 这地方真了不起
If you ever decide to sell, I want the listing.
如果你想卖♥♥的话 请交给我处理
Well, you'd have to kill my mom for it, so...
那你得先杀了我妈才行 所以...
sure.
没问题
Can I make you a drink?
你要喝点什么吗?
Charlie, we both know I'm gonna sleep with you.
查理 你我都知道我们要上♥床♥了
You don't have to liquor me up.
你没有必要把我灌醉
Hey, I've been doing this a long time.
嘿 我这招已经用很久了
Trust me, you'll want a drink.
相信我 你会想喝一杯的
Oh, hey.
嗨
I didn't know you guys were home.
我不知道你们在家
Lydia, this is my brother Alan.
莉迪亚 这是我弟 艾伦
Alan, hi.
艾伦 嗨
Hi.
嗨
So sorry to hear about your troubles.
对你的遭遇感到很遗憾
Troubles? What troubles?
遭遇? 什么遭遇?
Oh, maybe I have it wrong.
也许是我搞错了
Charlie, didn't you tell me he was divorced,
查理 你不是有跟我说他离婚
broke and living on your couch?
破产 而且睡在沙发上?
I don't know what she's talking about.
我不知道她在鬼扯些什么
Well, I am going through a bit of a rough patch,
嗯 我的确是遭遇了一些麻烦
but I try not to think about it too much.
但我尽量不去想太多
Good for you.
那就好
I'd be suicidal.
是我早自杀了
You hear that? You have options.
你听到了吗? 你有选择
Anyway, this is my nephew Jake.
这是我的侄子 杰克
Hello, Jake. Hi.
哈啰 杰克 嗨
So, what grade are you in?
你现在几年级了?
Seventh.
7年级
Well, don't you worry when the other kids make fun of you.
别去担心别的小孩取笑你
You'll show 'em someday.
总有一天你会反击的
Nobody makes fun of me.
没有人取笑我
You're kidding?
不会吧?
Why would anyone make fun of me?
为什么会有人取笑我?
And this is my housekeeper Berta.
然后这是我的管家 贝塔
Berta, Lydia.
贝塔 莉迪亚
Choose your words carefully, Slim.
讲话要谨慎 窈窕妹
Slim?
窈窕妹?
Why, thank you.
谢谢...
I watch what I eat.
我有在控制饮食
Going in or coming out?
吃进去还是拉出来的?
Hey, why don't we forget the drinks, and go out
嘿 不如我们别喝了
on the deck and enjoy the sunset?
到阳台上欣赏夕阳如何?
All right. Well, it was so nice to meet all of you.
好啊 很高兴认识大家
Uh-huh. Yeah. Sure.
嗯 是啊 当然
You didn't have to be so rude.
你没必要这么无礼
You said they were laughing with me.
你也提过他们取笑我的事
Hey, I got my own problems.
嘿 我自己都有麻烦了
Oh, Charlie...
哦 查理...
No need to thank me.
不要太感谢我
I wasn't going to.
我没这个打算
Excuse me?
你说什么?
I mean, it was very nice,
我是说 刚才很棒
it's just if I'd known you were gonna camp down there
只是 早知道你要在这里露营
I would've given you a lantern and some marshmallows.
我就会给你一个提灯和一些棉花糖 (比喻查理干太久了)
Hey, I was just trying to be thorough.
嘿 我只是不想随便夫衍了事
You were showing off.
你只是在炫耀
No, no, if I were showing off
不 不 如果我要炫耀
I'd have done it with no hands.
我就会不用手跟你做
So I can expect this kind of effort
所以我能预期每次我们上♥床♥
every time we get in bed?
你都会这么努力?
Well, maybe not during flu season.
也许在流感季节没办法
And it's important to have variety.
而且多样化是很重要的
I'm not always gonna swing for the long ball,
我不会一直想打长打
every once in a while I'll lay down a bunt,
有时候也会来个短打
and how did you manage to turn this into a bad thing?
而你怎么会把这个想成是坏事?
It's not a bad thing.
我没有说是坏事
Thank you.
谢谢
Which is not to say if you were open to suggestion
只是说如果你不能接受我的建议
it couldn't be better.
就不能做的更好
Oh, really?
哦 真的吗?
And how could it have been better?
那要怎么做的更好?
Ooh, looks like I pushed a button.
哦 看起来我让你一触即发啰 (Push the button有按♥摩♥女生阴♥核♥的意思)
Yeah, well, it looks like I didn't.
是啊 讲的好像我没做一样
Charlie...
查理...
you can push an elevator button a hundred times,
你按电梯钮100次
it still won't come any faster.
他也不会比较快来
Fine.
好吧
Maybe next time I'll take the stairs.
也许下次我走楼梯
Oh, come on...
拜托啦...
don't be like that.
不要这样嘛
You were magnificent.
你很棒
Astonishing.
很惊人
You've ruined me for other men.
你让我觉得其它男人都是废物
There, was that so hard?
看吧 这样讲很难吗?
You boys and your little egos.
你们男孩也有小小的自尊心喔
Okay, okay, stop.
好 好 先停
In this bed, we don't say "boys"
在这张床上 我们不能说"男孩"
and we don't say "little."
也不能说"小"
Fine.
好
You want me to try again?
你想要再来一次吗?
No, I'm a bit chafed.
不了 我有一点擦伤
Let's make the next few minutes about pleasing you.
不如接下来的几分钟 让我来取悦你
A few minutes? That's all I get?
几分钟? 我就得到这些?
Trust me, darling,
相信我 亲爱的
with me, that's all you can handle.
跟我做 几分钟就够你爽了
Hey, Dad? Yeah?
嘿 爸 嗯?
Do you like Uncle Charlie's new girlfriend?
你喜欢查理叔叔的新女友吗?
Well, I just met her the one time, so...
嗯 我只见过她一次面 所以...
no, not really.
不 不喜欢
You know who she reminds me of?
你知道她让我想起谁吗?
The girls at school who think they rule the world
那些在学校 自认为统治了全世界的女孩
just 'cause they got their boobs.
就因为她们有奶♥子♥
Well, I hate to tell you, buddy,
我虽然很不愿意讲 小老弟
but they kinda do.
不过她们并没说错
I don't get it.
我不明白
I wouldn't be mean if I had boobs.
如果我有奶♥子♥ 我不会这么恶劣
That's very admirable.
真令人钦佩
Hi there.
嗨 帅哥
I like you very much.
我非常喜欢你
Please don't do that.
请别这么做
Do what? I'm just being nice.
做什么? 我只是在示好
I'm serious. Cut it out.
我是说真的 快停止
Hey.
嗨
Hey.
嗨
(girly voice): Hello, big boy.
哈啰 大帅哥
You really need to get him into a sport.
你应该要让他去做些其它运动
I'll need a sports bra.
那我会需要运动型内衣
I said quit it.
我说了快停止
What are you watching?
你们在看什么?
I don't know, some Disney crap.
我不知道 某迪斯尼的烂片
Where's your girlfriend?
你女友呢?
Hey, my boob!
嘿 小心我的奶
She had to go pick up her kids.
她得去接她的小孩
Probably from therapy.
大概是去精神病院接
What's that supposed to mean?
这话是什么意思?
We don't like her.
我们不喜欢她
Who's "we"?
"我们"是指谁?
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
剧集 | 好汉两个半（2003） | 导航列表