好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S04E20
Part 3
Nov. 17, 2020, 1:58 p.m.
Best of luck to you and her.Bye-bye.
祝你们两个好运 再见
I'm going to the wedding.
我要去参加婚礼
what is this,candle wax?
这是什么 蜡?
How do you get candle wax on the seat of your pants?
你裤子上怎么会有蜡的?
I don't know. You don't know?
我不知道 你不知道?
Okay,I might've lit a couple of farts.
好吧 我想点燃屁来着... (当然是要让屁屁靠近烛火啦...)
I'm ready.Myra's ready.Is he ready?
我准备好了 迈尔也准备好了 他好了吗?
Does he look ready?
他看起来像准备好了吗?
Well,he's not wearing any pants.
他没穿裤子
That's ready for some things.
那应该是准备好做某些事了
Just go ahead.I'll get him there.
你先去吧 我会带他去的
Okay.
好吧
What is that?
那是什么?
Pudding.
布丁
you know what?I just realized something.
知道吗? 我刚意识到...
I am two for two at judith's weddings.
我这是第二次在朱迪丝的婚礼上"性福"了
What a coincidence I'm two for two at herb's weddings.
真巧啊 我也是第二次在哈珀的婚礼上"性福"
Okay.What about funerals?
好吧 葬礼呢?
Can you beat a threeway in a hearse. No.
能击败我这个在灵车上3P的记录吗? 不能...
You have to think about it?
你还需要好好回忆一下?
It's a gray area.
那是灰色地带嘛 (道德的也是记忆上的)
Where have you been? I've been looking all over for you.
你刚在去哪里了? 我到处找你
We were having sex in the coatroom.
我们当时正在衣帽间里嘿♥咻♥
Good one.
真好笑
Listen,one of my groomsmen got food poisoning
听着 我的一个伴郎食物中毒
so you're gonna have to walk down the aisle with uncle fred.
所以你只有和Fred叔叔 一起走向祭坛了
Uncle fred?
Fred叔叔
Is that the only man left?
他是剩下的惟一一个男的吗?
Well,there's cousin trudy.
还有Trudy表妹
She's pre-op,but she's wearing a very nice tux.
"她"很快就要上手术台了 但还是装着件很好看的礼服 (当然是变性手术咯)
Why can't I just walk down the aisle with charlie?
我为什么不能和查理一起走?
Whoa,I'm just an innocent bystander at this shindig.
哇 在这场闹剧中我只是个无辜的旁观者
Oh,come on,picture the look on judith's face when she sees you at the altar.
哦 拜托 想象一下朱迪丝看到我们 站在祭坛上以后的脸色
I'm in. Oh,god.
我愿意陪她走 哦 上帝啊...
Herb.Herb.
哈珀 哈珀
Hey,thanks for bringing him down.
嘿 多谢你把他带来
Well,you look very handsome,jake.
你看起来很帅 杰克
I know.It's the tux.
我知道 是礼服的缘故
Okay,well,uh,congratulations.
好吧...恭喜了...
I wish you both a lot of happiness.
我祝你们幸福美满
Oh,thanks,al.
哦 谢谢 艾伦
Don't make the same mistakes I did.
别跟我犯同样的错误
I won't she wrote them down for me.
我不会的 她把你的错误都写下来给我看了
Good.All right,buddy,uh,have some fun.
很好 那好 伙计 玩得愉快
Okay.
好的
Remember,that tux is a rental.
记住 那件礼服是租来的!
Excuse me.
打扰一下
Are you judith's ex-husband?
你是朱迪丝的前夫吗?
Uh,yeah,yeah,I was just dropping off our son.
恩 没错 我只是把我们的儿子送过来
I'm sorry,do I know you?
很抱歉 我认识你吗?
Oh,no,not really,it'S...
哦 不不 只是...
herb and I were engaged before he met judith,so...
哈珀遇到朱迪丝前我们曾订婚
and you're coming to his wedding?
而你来参加他的婚礼?
Yeah,well,we're still friends.
没错 我们还是朋友
Well,how very...california of you.
你们还真"加州风格"呢
Well,I wish him the best.
我给他最好的祝愿
I have to tell you,though,based on first impressions
我一定要告诉你 依据我的第一印象
I'm not sure that judith is trading up.
我看朱迪丝不一定找了个更好的老公哦
Thank you.
谢谢
uh,and having just met you,I feel safe in saying that herb's not getting an upgrade,either.
恩 虽然刚刚遇到你 但我觉得 Herb恐怕也没娶了个更好的人
oh,man!
哦 真衰...
Nice dress. Bite me.
衣服很漂亮 你咬我啊 (Bite me:不服啊?去死吧!此类意思)
Okay.Meet me in the coatroom.
好吧 在衣帽间里咬嘛
listen,after the reception,can you take me to the airport?
听着 婚宴过后你能送我去机场吗?
You're flying home tonight? Yeah.
你今晚就回家? 没错
I thought we had something going here.
我以为咱俩有意思呢?
We did,and now I'm going home.
确实有啊 现在我要回家了
Okay.Maybe I can come visit you sometime.
好吧 也许什么时候我可以去看你
Ooh,I don't think my boyfriend would like that very much.
哇...我想我男朋友可能不会太高兴的...
Your boyfriend?
你男朋友?
He's more like a fianc?
其实是个未婚夫...
You're getting married?
你要结婚了?
Why didn't you tell me you were engaged?
为什么不告诉我你订婚了?
I thought it would be awkward.
我觉得会让事情很尴尬的
Awkward?
尴尬?!
You may be seated.
各位请坐
We-we really shouldn't be doing this.
我们真的不该这样做
Why not?They broke our hearts.
为什么 他们让我们心都碎了
Uh,yeah,but I'm kind of over it.
没错 不过我基本上已经忘掉这些了
I'm not.
我还没有
Mm,mm,uh,hang on,hang on.
恩恩...等等等等
Maybe we could go out for coffee first.
也许我们应该先去喝杯咖啡
Or-or a movie.
或者看场电影
Alan,this is gonna happen with you or without you.
艾伦 有没有你我也要做!
With me or...
有没有我...
How does that work?
没有我你怎么做?
The institution of marriage is not one to enter lightly
婚姻的殿堂并不能轻入
so we pause at this time to consider the depth of that commitment.
所以我们暂停片刻让你们想象 即将建立的盟誓是否经过深思熟虑
Oh,alan harper,you animal!
哦 艾伦 哈珀 你个蛮牛!
I can't believe judith let you go!
我简直不能相信朱迪丝竟和你离婚
Oh,god!Alan harper!
哦 上帝! 艾伦 哈珀!
Oh,god!Oh,don't stop,alan harper!
哦 上帝啊! 艾伦 哈珀 不要停!
Please don't stop!
求你不要停!
Oh,alan harper,I feel like a woman again!
哦 艾伦 哈珀 我又觉得自己是个女人了!
I'm alan harper,and I'm not having sex!
艾伦 哈珀就是我 我可没在和人嘿♥咻♥!
hey. Hey.
嘿 嘿
How was the reception?
婚宴如何?
Kind of a letdown after the ceremony.
比起婚礼来可无聊多了
But you'll be happy to know your little outburst is already on youtube.
但你应该很高兴地得知 你的小小爆发已经被贴到Youtube上面了
Damn camera phones.
该死的视频手♥机♥!
Boy,is mom mad at you. Yeah.
哇塞 妈妈对你可火大了 是啊
Well,she might as well start her second marriage the same way as the first.
那看来她的第二次婚姻和 第一次有着同样的开局
So...drinking in the dark,eh?
那么...你就在黑暗中独饮咯?
It wasn't dark when I started.
我开始喝的时候天还没黑呢
Did you get myra to the airport? Yeap.
你送迈尔到机场去了? 是啊
And you know what?
而且你知道吗?
I'll never see her again.
我再也见不到她了
I was just a meaningless fling to that girl.
对她来说我只不过是一段 毫无意义的小插曲
I'll bet this is that whole karma thing people talk about.
我看这就是人们所说的"因果报应"吧
Could be.
可能是吧
you know that feeling you get when...
你知道那种感觉...
somebody's gone from your life,and you...
那种有人从你生活中消失掉...
you suddenly realize that you miss them?
你突然意识到自己想念他们的感觉
Yeah.
我了解那感觉
I don't care for it.
我才无所谓呢
Hey,you know what always cheers me up?
嘿 你知道什么东西永远能让我开心吗?
Pigs in a blanket.
毯裹猪肉 (Pigs in a Blanket:欧美一道菜肴 猪肉和米饭外包甘蓝菜叶)
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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