好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men S04E13
Part 4
Nov. 17, 2020, 1:57 p.m.
Oh, boy.
天哪
What?
咋了
Not only was Aunt Wendy not my aunt,
Wendy阿姨也不是我真的阿姨
there was no snakebite on her boob.
她胸部上也没有蛇咬的伤痕
Oh, hey. What are you doing here?
嘿 你们在这干嘛
Uh, well, we were hoping that...
我们想...
Actually, I was hoping that, uh, maybe...
其实我想 我想...
He wants me to stay here tonight
他想让我在这儿过夜
so he and Mom can have sex.
这样他和妈妈就能做♥爱♥了
Oh. Jake, I'm sure that's not the reason, right, Herb?
杰克 肯定不是这样的啦 对吧 Herb?
No, that's pretty much it.
就是这样
Excuse me.
不好意思
Where are you going?
你去哪里
To tell Mom that her indiscriminate bed-hopping
去告诉妈妈她的床上生活
has scarred me for life.
已经对我幼小的心灵造成了严重的创伤
Jury's still out on me.
放心我还没那么严重
What do you want, Charlie?
你要干嘛 Charlie?
We need to talk.
我要和你谈谈
You should have called first.
你应该先打个电♥话♥
I'm a little under the weather.
我现在没心情和你谈
Yeah, well, I'm not feeling so great myself.
好吧 我也不爽啊
I've started remembering things.
我开始想起一些事情
Well, call the poor girls,
那你就打电♥话♥给那个可怜的女孩
apologize and stop drinking so much.
跟她道歉 还有下次别喝那么多了
No, I'm remembering things about you.
不 我是记起了一些关于你的事情
Things from my childhood.
童年往事
Wait a minute. What are you doing?
等等 你干吗啊
You can't even look at me, can you?
你根本不敢看我是吧
I don't care what you think you remember.
我不管你记起了什么
I was a terrific mother who loved you
总之我是个好妈妈
even though you were a horrible little boy.
而你是个坏小孩儿
Now go away.
现在给我滚蛋
Mom, this is important!
妈 这很重要
Mom?
妈妈
You ruined Yosemite Sam for me!
你把Yosemite Sam在我心目中的形象给毁了
Dagnabit, this isn't over.
这事儿我跟你没完
Oh, God!
哦 天哪
Charlie?
查理?
Don't worry, slugger. I'm not hurting your mother.
别担心 多拉A梦 我没伤害你妈妈
OK,i have to catch my bus.
好了 我要去赶公车了
Good night, Berta.
晚安 贝塔
Hey, Dad, guess what I found in Mom's bedroom.
爸 猜我在妈妈房♥间里发现了什么
You know what? I'll take a cab.
我等会打的去
An empty canof whipped cream.
一只空奶油盒子
Whipped cream. No kidding?
奶油 不会吧
Yep. And you know what I'm thinking?
是啊 你知道我怎么样的吗
I know what I'm thinking.
你知道我怎么想的吗
Uh-uh-uh!
不行不行不行
What?
怎么
Either whipped cream has something to do with sex,
要么这奶油和性♥爱♥有关
or Mom hides pie in her nightstand, too.
要么妈妈也偷偷在床头柜里藏了派
Hey, a gal can do both.
嘿 两者皆有可能
Uh-uh-uh!
不行不行不行
Hey.
嘿
Hey, what happened to you?
你咋地了
What are you talking about?
我怎么了啊
I thought you went to Mom's.
我以为你去妈妈家了
No.
没
Then where were you?
那你去哪儿了
I don't remember.
我不记得了
What do you mean, you don't remember?
什么 你不记得了
It's called a repressed memory.
这叫压抑性记忆
Now drop it!
别提了
Any one of you you lily-livered, bowlegged varmints care
你们有哪个不怕死的
to slap leather with me?!
敢跟我单挑吗
I'm the hootinest, tootinest, shootinest
我是宇宙第一超强
bobtailed wildcat!
大野猫
I'm the fastest gun north, south, east and west
我射的超快 东西南北就属我最牛逼
好汉两个半（2003）
Two and a Half Men
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