生活大爆炸
The Big Bang Theory S12E19
Part 2
Oct. 8, 2019, 11:10 a.m.
用酒精麻痹大脑 再看真人秀
Numb your brain with alcohol and watch a reality show
看有钱人怎么吵假架来博镜头
where wealthy people pick fake arguments with each other?
你没试过在这上面浪费几百小时生命
Hey, don't knock it until you've wasted
就别随便评论好吗
a couple hundred hours of your life.
我很抱歉 但这对我来说太难了
I'm sorry, but this is, it's hard for me.
通常我都是靠着科研来舒缓情绪
Usually I self-soothe by doing science,
可一做科研 就让我想起诺贝尔奖
but now science reminds me of the Nobel Prize
一想到我们可能赢不了 我就来气
and the idea that we may not win one, and that makes me angry,
一来气 我就想用科研来舒缓情绪
which makes me want to self-soothe by doing science,
接着就是无限恶性循环
and on and on and on.
这就是我今天的经历
So that's been my today.
不如去按♥摩♥一下吧
Hey, how about a massage?
不行 世上唯一能碰触我的人只有我老婆
No, the only person who touches me is my wife.
就算是我 也得先让他闻闻我的手
And even I have to let him smell my hand first.
好吧 那不如试试灵气疗法吧
Okay, well, what about Reiki?
类似按♥摩♥却不需要肢体接触
It's like massage but without touching.
那是什么玩法
Then what is it?
我把手放在你身体旁边
Well, I place my hands near your body
让宇宙能量场
and allow the universal energy field
来展现它的疗愈能力
to manifest its healing powers.
我懂啦
Okay, I know
听起来很疯狂 但真的有效 不信你问莱纳德
it sounds crazy, but it really works; ask Leonard.
-真的有用 -对吧
- It really does. - Yeah.
才怪
No.
那感官剥夺水箱怎么样
Oh, uh, how about a sensory deprivation tank?
听起来很有趣
Oh, that's interesting.
据说特别能让人平静下来
It's supposed to be very calming.
漂浮在温暖的液体里
Floating in a warm pool of liquid
在黑暗寂静的空间中
in a dark, soundless space.
我不知道我被剥夺感官后
Oh, I don't know how I feel about
会如何反应
being deprived of all my senses.
你在说什么呀 你不是时时刻刻都在抱怨
What are you talking about? All you ever do is complain
万物难闻 难受又难听吗
about how things smell, feel and sound.
我人就在这里 你大声嚷嚷什么呀
Oh, I'm right here. Why are you shouting?
你觉得如何 我们可以一起放个假
What do you say? We could both use a break.
来嘛 我和你一起做
Come on, I'll do it with you.
好吧 但不能泡在同一个水箱里
Okay, but not in the same tank.
我已经和我的双胞胎姐姐泡过同一个子♥宫♥了
I already shared a uterus with my twin sister.
我可不想再经历一次
I don't need to go through that again.
-你闭上眼睛了吗 -闭着呢 到底是什么 快让我看看
- Are your eyes closed? - Yes. What is it? Show me.
睁开吧
Okay, open them.
你给我买♥♥了一辆小摩托吗
You bought me a scooter?!
才怪 我给自己买♥♥了一辆小摩托
No, I bought me a scooter!
那你为啥要我闭眼睛
Then why did you make me close my eyes?
我想看看当你看到我高兴时
I wanted to see the expression on your face
是什么表情呀
when you saw how happy I was.
等等
Wait, one second.
伯纳黛特看到不会生气吗
Won't Bernadette be mad when she finds out?
她才不会知道呢 我会把车留在学校里
She's not gonna. I'm keeping it here at the university.
我爸爸也在工作场所保留了一个秘密
My dad kept a secret at work, too,
不过那是他的接待员小姐
but it was his receptionist.
你介意我偶尔来骑一下吗
Hey, would you mind if I ride it sometimes?
没问题 想骑就骑吧
Yeah, whenever you want.
看看
Check it out.
这个乖乖
That there, son,
可具有十二匹意大利猛♥男♥马力呢
is 12 horses of "Eye-talian" thunder.
你们俩有谁体验过感官剥夺水箱吗
Have either of you done sensory deprivation before?
-没 -没体验过
- No. - Never.
好的 友情提醒一下
Okay, just a heads up.
每个人在水箱中都有不同的体验
People have different experiences in the tanks.
有的人会非常平静
Uh, some people experience perfect calm.
有的人会睡着
Some people sleep.
还有人声称看到了幻象
Some people even reported having visions.
但如果你感到不舒服
But if at any time you feel uncomfortable,
请马上按下紧急按钮并呼唤"碧碧"
just press the panic button and say, "Bebe."
这个词也太蠢了
That's a stupid word.
那是我的名字
That's my name.
如果我们不舒服 我们该按哪里
What do we push if we feel uncomfortable?
好了 你们准备好了吗
All right, are you ready?
虽然这不是我们的来意
I'm not saying this is why we came,
但可以让我帮他盖上盖子吗
but can I close the lid on him?
不行
No.
还是不行
No.
开始吧
Shall we?
等一下
One second.
-水的酸碱度是在7.2-7.8之间吗 -是的
- Is the pH between 7.2 and 7.8? -Yes.
-每次使用后水都换新吗 -是的
- Is the water drained and replaced after each use? - Yes.
-盐度值是30%吗 -是的
- Is the saline level 30%? - Yes.
-你的过滤系统是用紫外线来杀菌的吗 -是的
- Does your filtration system use ultraviolet light to kill bacteria? - Yes.
我不用进去了 我现在就够放松了
I don't need to get in. I'm relaxed already.
碧碧
Bebe.
怎么了
What's wrong?
没事 我只是想确认一下好不好使
Nothing. I just wanted to make sure it worked.
还有 我改变主意了
Also, I changed my mind.
你的名字念起来挺好玩的
It's fun to say your name.
碧碧 碧碧
Bebe. Bebe.
你拿的什么呀
Hey, what you got there?
我只是要把这个没用的老头盔给扔了
Just tossing out this old helmet I don't need.
你以为你去公园了呢
I thought you were at the park.
我们去了 不过孩子想睡觉了
We were. The kids got sleepy.
很好 等我打个电♥话♥先
Great story. I need to make a phone call.
霍华德 你怎么看起来充满罪恶感
Howard, why do you look all guilty?
就像我抓到你删除浏览器记录时一样
Like when I catch you deleting your browser history?
没事了
Never mind.
这样真不错
Hmm, this is nice.
这就像是漂浮在太空中
It's sort of like floating in space.
但我的眼球没有冻住 所以更好
But better because my eyeballs haven't frozen.
五彩斑斓
Ooh, colors.
这是曼德尔布罗集♥合♥中
It's infinite iterations
鹦鹉螺部分的无限迭代呀
of the "Nautilus" section of the Mandelbrot set.
真是好东西
That's some good stuff.
这里可真黑啊
Wow, this is really dark.
不管我睁眼还是闭眼 都感觉不到区别呢
There's no difference between my eyes being open or closed.
睁眼 闭眼
Open, closed.
睁眼 闭 算了 都一样
Open, clo-- nope, same thing.
哇 好美丽
Ooh, pretty.
如果你获得了诺贝尔奖 对所有女性都是一种鼓舞
You winning a Nobel Prize would be an inspiration to all women.
所有女性 艾米 可你搞砸了
All women, Amy, and you're blowing it.
我本来要成为一名科学家 可因为你输了
I was gonna be a scientist, but since you lost,
我现在只能在油管频道上开设化妆课了
I'm just gonna give makeup tutorials on YouTube.
看看这无止境的曼德布洛特集♥合♥
Look all the infinite Mandelbrot sets.
这里布洛特 那里布洛特 到处都是曼德布洛特
Here a brot, there a brot, everywhere a Mandelbrot.
谢谢你让我们如此失望
Thanks for letting us down.
我现在要嫁给傻瓜 给他生一群小傻瓜了
I'm gonna marry a dope and have his dopey children.
-你真是太令人失望了 - 我不能从事科研了
- You're such a disappointment. - I can't do science.
-下得一手烂棋 -太失败了
- Way to not go, girl. - Disappointing.
-数学真的太难了 -我是妇女 只配下厨
- Math is too hard. - I am woman, hear me bake.
-令人沮丧 -你让我们失望
- Disappointment. - You're letting us down.
-你让我们失望 -你搞砸了
- You're letting us down. - You're blowing it.
-失望透顶 -你搞砸了
- Disappointment. - You're blowing it.
一小时到了 看看他们如何吧
Okay, hour's up. Let's see how they're doing.
老兄 你还好吗
Hey, buddy, how you feeling?
再玩5分钟嘛
Five more minutes?
艾米 放松了没
Hey, Amy. Relaxed?
我是个失败者 我做不到
I'm a failure! I can't do this!
谁来把她的盖子关上
Can someone close her lid?
她把我的平和心情都打破了
She's kind of harshing my mellow.
那个水箱太神奇了
That tank was amazing.
就像是在迪斯尼乐园 但坐的是35维度的过山车
It was like Disneyland, but the rides were in 35 dimensions.
而且和我合照的不是米奇
And instead of Mickey, I had my picture taken
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The Big Bang Theory
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