单亲

Single Parents S02E02

Part 3 Nov. 24, 2019, 3:16 p.m.

your full name, your extension, and a brief ice-breaker
容易引起共鸣的话题比如天气
about a relatable topic like the weather.
什么样的憨憨会留这种语♥音♥信息
What kind of dumb-dumb leaves a voicemail like that?
我不明白为什么展会建议人群要满16岁
I don't know why that exhibit was recommended for 16 and up.
我学到了很多啊
I mean, I learned a lot.
你怎么在这里
What are you doing here?
你不是班主任
You're not the Room Parent.
我是以公民的身份来的
I am here as a private citizen.
我们同一天来到这里
The fact that we're here on the same day --
纯属巧合
total coincidence.
庞贝古城的恐惧
这是新运动衫吗
Is that a new sweatshirt?
你出门穿的那件呢
What happened to the sweatshirt you left the house in?
已经不适合我了所以我捐了
It's not really me anymore, so I donated it.
税收目的
For tax purposes.
谁比较容易骗
Who's the patsy?
快来阻止那个孩子
Someone stop that kid!
这是我的职责
It's my job,
但我今天喝多了没法履行班主任的职责
but I'm too drunk to Room Parent today!
但我在那件运动衫上留了一条鼓励的话
But I left an encouraging note in that sweatshirt.
和我鞋子上的那条有什么不一样吗
Was it different than the encouraging note in my shoe?
很相似但是要连起来读
They were similar, but of a piece.
我说快来阻止那个孩子
I said, "Someone stop that kid!
这是我的职责
It's my job,
但我今天喝多了没法履行班主任的职责
but I'm too drunk to Room Parent today!"
你到底怎么了
Hey, what has gotten into you?
从太空营回来之后你整个人都不一样了
You've been so different ever since you got back from space camp.
为什么
Why is --
格雷厄姆离那个恐龙那么近
Graham so close to that dinosaur?
好问题
Great question.
等等什么叫"承重"
Wait, what's "Load-bearing"?
管它呢
Oh, well.
快跑快离开这里
Go! Go, go, go! Get out of here!
孩子们快跑
Kids, run!
安吉你知道我为什么来这里
Ange, you know why I'm here.
不知道
No.
但我也不会去质疑
But I'm not questioning it,
就像有的卫生纸
like when one roll of toilet paper
声称一卷顶四卷
says it equals four rolls of toilet paper.
我能怎么办呢把纸铺开量吗
Like, what am I gonna do? Unroll it and measure?
感谢你给予了我
Thank you for giving me the same benefit of the doubt
和卫生纸一样的信任
that you give toilet paper.
但是
But no.
我来是因为我收到了米基的语♥音♥留言
I'm here because I got a voicemail from Miggy.
他要辞去书酒吧的工作
He's quitting the Winebrary
因为他喜欢在这工作
because he loves working here.
看我也会胡言乱语
See? I can talk nonsense, too.
米基很有创新精神
Miggy's a creative spirit.
他在追寻自己梦想的时候
I mean, he needs the flexibility of the Winebrary
需要书酒吧的轻松工作环境
while he follows his dreams,
不管是沙滩运动鞋还是游泳牛仔裤
be it Beach Sneaks or Swimming Jeans
还是臭草人吓走臭鼬的稻草人
or Scareskunk -- the scarecrow for skunks.
放松好吗
Relax, okay?
我保证米基讨厌这里
I-I promise, Miggy hates it here.
不听听这条语♥音♥留言
No. Listen to this voicemail.
你好我是米基·拉法斯邦德·朴
Hello, this is Miggy LeFassbender Park.
6921号♥分机
Extension 6921.
你敢相信这里的湿度吗
Can you believe this humidity?
他的全名分机号♥
His full name, extension number,
还有一句简短的破冰
and a brief ice-breaker
容易引起共鸣的话题比如天气
about a relatable topic like the weather.
是那什么意思
Yeah? W-What does that mean?
意思是跟着我祈祷还没有为时过晚
It means follow me and pray we're not too late.
我有个坏消息要告诉VH-1电视台
Well, I've got bad news for VH-1,
因为我找到了全新的《最棒的一周》
'cause there's a new "Best Week Ever."
VH-1电视台节目
就是我在这度过的一周
And it's the one I just had here!
击击掌
Give me some!
击击掌
Give me some!
难免的
Hey, it happens.
我和骨头战斗结果骨头赢了
I fought the bones, and the bones won.
我和比斯奇思校长联♥系♥了
Well, I just spoke to Principal Biscuits,
他说无论今天发生了什么
and he said that despite what transpired today,
以后
future accounts...
道格拉斯会以英雄的身份被人铭记
shall remember Douglas as a hero.
因为人们会喝酒
Because people drink,
孩子们会乱摸骨架会倒下来
kids touch things, skeletons fall.
但道格拉斯保持了冷静
But Douglas kept his cool,
这才是真正的班主任
and that -- that's what a real Room Parent does.
不
No!
真正的班主任
What a real Room Parent does
会直接汇报上级
is takes their case straight to the top!
放松点这些孩子还没缓过来
Okay, easy. These kids are still skittish.
你激动的声音听上去
You have to know that your excited voice
和大骨架散落的声音一模一样
sounds exactly like giant clattering bones.
汇报上级
Straight to the top.
二年级生驻办处公章
联合主管五分钟后会给我简要汇报
I'm being briefed by the Joint Line-Leaders in five minutes.
你们有四分钟抓紧时间
You have four. Make them count.
罗里是这么回事
Alright, look, Rory, here's the deal --
我们需要你帮个忙好吗
We need a favor, okay?
修改山顶小学的章程这样
Amend Hilltop's charter so that --
我已经帮过一个忙了
I've already done a favor.
夏天的时候
Over the summer,
我收到了一位选民寄来的明信片
I received a postcard from a constituent asking me to pass
请求我通过《隔年班主任法案》
the Every-Other-Year Room Parent Act.
我通过了这就是我帮的忙
So, I did. That was the favor.
那个选民是谁
Who was the constituent?
我宣誓要保密了
I've been sworn to secrecy.
不过这剧情过于狗血不容错过
But this is too Shakespearean to pass up.
苏菲
Sophie.
内罗比
Nairobi.
库珀
Cooper.
你爆料的方式也太残忍♥了
That was a really insensitive way of delivering that news.
你为什么这么在意我从书酒吧辞职
W-Why do you care if I quit the Winebrary?
你还记得我们在《卧底老板》的节目上
Remember all the stuff you caught me doing
我被你逮着做什么了吗
when we were on "Undercover Boss"?
再说一遍我们没有参加过《卧底老板》
Okay, again, we were never on "Undercover Boss."
我那天就是戴了个帽子
I just wore a hat that day.
波比书酒吧给了我时间去追随梦想
Poppy, the Winebrary gave me time to follow my dreams,
但我找到了更好的
but I've found something better --
无脑忙活的快乐
the joy of mindless busy work.
我开♥发♥臭草人的时候
When I was developing Scareskunk,
我总是有很多事要做
there was always more I could be doing.
但现在我五点下班
But now, I leave work at 5:00
第二天九点之前不用想工作的事
and don't think about it until 9:00 the next day.
全心全意地陪杰克
And I can be 100% present with Jack.
-别扯杰克那闲聊呢 -是啊
- You leave Jack out of this. What about the small talk? - Yeah!
我可喜欢了
I love it.
闲聊就是谈话版的无脑忙活
The small talk is the busy work of conversation.
米基这不仅仅和你追梦有关
Look, Miggy, this isn't just about you following your dreams.
我想你了
I miss you.
我需要找人聊聊的时候你一直都在
You were always there when I needed to talk.
我还会在的
I'll still be there.
我就住在你楼上
I do live upstairs from you.
这倒是
True.
好吧
Okay.
你被炒了
Then you're fired.
谢谢大恩大德没齿难忘
Thank you. I'll never forget this.
客套够了吧
Must be nice to wrap everything up in a bow,
能继续说我的事了吗
but can we get back to my thing now?
米基如果你真的很喜欢在这工作
Miggy, if you love it here so much,