单亲

Single Parents S02E04

Part 4 Nov. 24, 2019, 3:16 p.m.

那是你的不对哥们你应该告诉我的
Okay, that's on you, dude. You should have said something.
我没说是因为我知道你需要我
Well, I didn't because I knew that you needed me.
你认为我需要你吗
Oh, y-you think I need you?
最近吗没错非常需要
Lately? Yeah. A lot.
帮你补墙在格雷厄姆面前成了替罪羊
Patching up holes, being a scapegoat for Graham,
帮你掩盖危害很大且非常怪异的
trying to keep you from making a sexual mistake
让你家着火的性♥爱♥错误
so toxic and weird that it literally set your house on fire.
我看得出来你不想听到这些
I can tell this isn't going over well
因为你现在浑身充满了负鼠的气息
'cause now you're giving me serious possum vibes,
充满怒气完全不饥渴
like, all of the anger and none of the horny.
我一点都不饥渴好吗
Oh, I'm definitely not horny, okay?
我不需要你
And I don't need you.
如果要说这世上我最在行什么
If there's one thing I know how to do,
那就是照顾家人
it's fend for my family,
即使这意味着我必须面对一只凶残的野兽
even if it means facing a wild, ferocious animal.
安吉我知道你很坚强
Angie, I know how strong you are, okay?
我没有质疑这一点
I didn't mean to question that.
听起来你在质疑啊
Well, it sounded like you did.
不如这样
You know, how about this --
你走吧
why don't you go?
去KZOP的K歌♥之夜
Do KZOP karaoke.
和盖伊·麦考米克合唱《瀑布》
Sing "Waterfalls" With Guy McCormick
如果你确实想去的话
if that's what gets you going.
你明知我唱不了那首歌♥
You know damn well that's outside of my register.
好走不送威尔
There's the door, Will.
走吧
Go.
我好怕
I'm scared.
我真是太羞愧了
I mean, I embarrassed myself.
难道我是个嫉妒心强的母鸡吗
Is this who I am -- a jealous hen?
我以为我不至于这样呢
I thought I was better than that.
这是你的薯片累爸爸
Here's your chips, Tired Dad.
太好了你目前领先
Oh, great. Hey, you're winning.
是吗
I am?
当然随便了我也不记得
Yeah, sure, whatever. I don't know.
话说回来波比甜心
Anyway, Pop-Tart,
你真的嫉妒这些女人吗
were you really jealous of these women?
不我不是嫉妒她们
No, I don't think I was jealous of them.
那是什么原因
Then what was it?
道格拉斯讲了一个
Well, Douglas told a story
萝斯以前是如何蘸蛋黄酱吃胡萝卜的故事
about how Rose used to eat carrots and mayo.
我想象她坐在他身边吃着胡萝卜
And I imagined her eating it next to him,
我就...很难过
and -- I don't know -- it made me sad.
确实很难过
That is sad.
不过也太天才了吧
But also genius.
孩子们
Kids!
给我端来胡萝卜蘸蛋黄酱可以得一百万分
Carrots and mayo for a million points!
这一百万分我赢定了
I'm going for the million!
把辣椒罐头当作猫粮
Now we pretend that the chili is cat food.
把它堆成一座小山丘呈给我
Form it into a little mound and serve it to me.
什么不
Wh-- No!
这也太诡异了
This is too weird.
我不懂这怎么就成了财富与反抗的故事
And I don't understand how this is a "Tale of wealth and rebellion."
外面再恐怖也不可能比这里更恐怖了
Whatever's scary out there can't be as scary as what's going on in here.
你最好不要藏在我的内衣抽屉里
You better not be in my underwear drawer,
大变♥态♥
you big perv.
快现身...
Come on. Show your --
对就是你
Okay, you.
我才不怕你
I'm not scared of you.
骗你的其实我很害怕
That's a lie. Yes, I am.
你的牙齿非常怪异
Your teeth are incredibly freaky,
鼻子也很可憎
and I really, really hate your nose.
行了赶紧决定
And -- come on -- make up your mind.
你到底是不是斗鸡眼
Are you cross-eyed or not?
但我已经单打独斗很多年
But I have been on my own for many, many years,
唯一的好处就是
and the one good thing about that is,
我无所不能
I can do anything.
瞧好吧负鼠
So check it, possum.
我要抓住你然后把你投入地狱
I'm gonna catch and release you...to hell!
这太蠢了
This was stupid!
你为什么倒着拎尖鼻子猫
Why are you holding that pointy cat upside down?!
我不知道你妈是个傻瓜
I don't know! Your mom's a dumbass!
不你不是
No, you're not!
你是安吉·D·阿玛托西西里岛的骄傲
You're Angie D'Amato, pride of Sicily!
你说得对
Y-You're right!
-好那我撤了 -不不不
- Cool! Godspeed! - No, no, no, no, no!
给我回来
You get back here!
你是格雷厄姆·D·阿玛托
You are Graham D'Amato!
你不需要地堡
You don't need a bunker!
我们一起可以对抗一切拿上那个包
We can handle anything together, so grab that bag
帮妈妈抓住这只暴躁的啮齿动物
and help Mommy trap this very agitated rodent.
好了
?Okay. Now...
-我们成功了 -我们成功了
- We did it. ?- Ohh, we did it.
我们把一只野生动物装进了我的野营包里
We just put a wild animal in my camp duffel!
我真为你骄傲
I'm so proud of you!
不是我为你骄傲妈妈
No, I'm proud of you, Mom!
太刺♥激♥了
That was intense.
但是结束了
But it's over.
没错
Yeah.
别动你这个反颌混球
Stop right there, you underbite-y son of a bitch!
你们还好吗
You guys okay in here?
我听见尖叫了
I heard screaming,
大门锁着所以
and the f-front door was locked, so...
天哪我真抱歉
Oh, God. I'm sorry about this.
我越帮越忙了
I made it so much worse.
我正盼着你回来呢
Aww, I was hoping you'd come back.
我知道之前我表现地像个嫉妒的母鸡
Look, I know I acted like a jealous hen earlier.
天哪母鸡这事还真是深入我心
Man, that hen thing really burrowed into my brain.
嗯我应该把这些写下来
Yeah, you know, I should write some of those down,
也许出一本书
maybe put out a book --
比如你在上厕所时看的书
something small for like when you're on the john.
道格拉斯我嫉妒的不只是
Look, Douglas, it wasn't just me being jealous
你对那些女人敞开心扉
about you opening up to those women,
虽然我希望你对我这么做
though I do want you to do that with me.
你还抒发了真情实感
There was something real there.
如果要我说实话
And if I'm being honest...
我听到你说萝斯的事时很不好受
it was hard for me to hear you talk about Rose.
我前夫和我分手了
I mean, my ex-husband and I -- we broke up,
但你妻子在你还爱着她的时候去世了
but your wife died while you were still in love with her.
她会一直在你心中有一席之地
She'll always have a place in your heart.
而我得习惯和她分享你
And I got to get comfortable sharing that.
听着我还在适应失去她的生活
Look, I'm still working through losing her.
但是和你在一起
But being with you -- well...
这是我长久以来最幸福的时刻
that's the happiest I've been in a long time.
也许我该给那些女士们写个道歉卡
Maybe I'll write those ladies an apology card.
不用了时机已过
No. That ship has sailed.
好吧
Okay.
嗯我知道野生动物可能有狂犬病
Yes, I am aware that wild animals can carry rabies.
不我才不收养它
No, I will not foster to adopt him.
动物管制局
Animal control?
嗯他们态度超级差
Yes, and they were very, very mean.
是吧但我肯定
Yeah, well, I'm pretty sure
抓着负鼠的尾巴
that grabbing a possum by the tail,
把它扔进包里这绝对不行
throwing it into a bag -- it's a big no-no.
一头撞穿别人家的墙也不行啊
So is diving through someone else's wall.
你现在才说
Oh, now you tell me. ?
我知道你不需要任何人
I know you don't need anybody,
但我挺喜欢被人需要
but I-I kind of think I like being needed.
我觉得我有问题
I think I have a problem.
没错
Yeah, you do.
但我有时过分利用了
But I might sometimes exploit it,