单亲

Single Parents S02E18

Part 3 June 24, 2020, 4:10 p.m.

我们一直在发短♥信♥
We've been texting.
这一切
This is all just --
真是太
it's so frickin'...
-体贴了 -等等什么
- sweet! - ?Wait, what?
反转
Twist.
出生公告上我要把宝宝
So, for the birth announcement, I wanted to put the baby
放在很大的运动鞋里
in a really big sneaker
下面写上"在这里猜鞋"
and then underneath say, "Guess Shoes Here!"
太棒了太有才了
Oh, that's good. That's very good.
我跟罗恩说我要最大的球鞋
I told Ron I needed the biggest sneaker possible.
然后他说"你是要沙奎尔·奥尼尔的鞋"
And he was like, "You need a Shaquille O'Neal shoe."
然后我说"这不现实"
And I was like, "That's impossible."
然后今早
And then, this morning,
他在富乐客工作的表亲给他打电♥话♥
his cousin who works at the Foot Locker called
说沙奎周末来了
and said that Shaq came in over the weekend
然后送了我一只他的鞋
and gave him a shoe for me!
所以我老公去亚利桑那州取鞋了
And my man went to Arizona to get it.
你很满意吗
And you...like that?
非常满意
Oh, I love it.
他太疯狂了
He's a wildcard.
没错
Exactly.
不能让一个疯子
I-I mean, you don't want a wildcard
在医院陪着你啊
by your side in the hospital.
还是跟我们一起更靠谱
You'd be better off with us.
罗恩曾经给罗里取名"黑烟怪"
Ron tried to name Rory "Smoke Monster."
致敬《迷失》吗
Is that a "Lost" Reference?
太赞了吧
That's freaking awesome!
莎伦也疯了计划有变
Well, Sharon's crazy, so new plan.
这是绑♥架♥
This is kidnapping!
-深呼吸 -你们总嘲笑我的大面包车
- Breathe. - You all make fun of my big-ass van,
现在是谁救了你们安吉
but who's saving the day now? Angie!
难以置信罗恩居然错过分娩了
I can't believe Ron's gonna miss the birth.
我相信他可不怎么负责任
I can. He is not a responsible guy.
就算负责任也有可能错过分娩
You can be responsible and still miss the birth of your child.
-我都没错过 -我也是
- Even I was there for the birth. - Yeah, same.
虽然没有在身边但是我在医院
I was at a healthy distance, but I was there.
如果不在那就是失职
If you're not, you're a deadbeat.
-没错 -我不是
- Yeah. - Um, I am not a deadbeat!
好吧我要坦白一件事
All right, look, I have a confession to make.
我说的故事是假的
The story I told you all is a lie.
我错过了苏菲的出生
I missed Sophie's birth.
真正故事的并不是以晚霞开始
The actual story begins not with light...
而是暴雨
but with rain.
那是本世纪最大的暴风雨
It was the storm of the century.
雷东多海滩的人都在找我指导
All of Redondo Beach was looking to me for guidance.
我能怎么办呢
What could I do?
民众很害怕
The people were scared.
他们需要天气侠我责无旁贷
They needed a weatherman, and I was he.
我一结束洪水预警播报
Once I issued the flood warning
交给体育频道的弗兰基·D后
and threw it over to Frankie D in Sports,
就冲向医院
I-I rushed to the hospital.
但一切都太晚了
But it was too late.
看看你的女儿英雄
Meet your daughter, hero.
虽然很不好受
It wasn't easy,
-但我知道这事正确的选择 -嗯
- but I knew it was the right thing to do. - Yeah.
-头出来了 -天啊
- The head is out. - ?Oh, my God!
我看到孩子了
?There's a baby!
还跟我做了眼神交流
I made eye contact with it.
要生了
It's being born!
不能在我的车里生
Not in my van!
我会车里吃饭
I eat in here!
天呐
Dear lord.
天啊
Oh, my God.
我的加油站
My gas station.
你好老朋友
Hello, old friend.
爸爸回来了
Daddy's home.
我拿了莎伦分娩计划的东西
Okay, I got the stuff for Sharon's birth plan.
没有薰衣草蜡烛但我找到了柠檬味的漂白剂
No lavender candles, but I did find lemon-scented bleach.
好这虽然不是史提夫·汪达的专辑
Cool. And it's not Stevie Wonder,
但我在货架上找到了迈克尔·波顿的CD
but I found a Michael Bolton CD on a random shelf somewhere.
-很好 -其实是在我车上找到的
- Nice. - The shelf is in my car.
-这是我亲热时用的 -好吧
- It's mine. For make-outs. - ?Okay.
不是吧道格拉斯船类杂♥志♥
Really, Douglas, a boating magazine?
抱歉习惯了
Sorry, force of habit!
你们看到了吗米基说得对
You guys seeing this? Miggy's right.
他在这里真的如鱼得水
He's legitimately amazing here.
叫救护车了吗速播键是4
Have we called the ambulance? It's speed dial four!
史蒂夫洗手间钥匙要绑在毂盖上
Steve, we need the bathroom key
不是苍蝇拍
attached to the hub cap, not the fly swatter!
准备肉干给准妈妈咬来缓解疼痛
And beef jerky for the mother to bite on for pain!
麦奇婴儿床就绪了吗
Madge, is the cot set?
你最靠谱了麦奇
You da freaking best, Madge!
漂亮我爱这个团队赶紧的
Noice! I love this team! All right, let's hustle!
朋友们我可能爱上米基了
Guys, I might be into Miggy.
谁在陪莎伦
Who's with Sharon?
快走
Go, go, go, go!
接生洗手间
那帮傻子居然要我付杯子钱
Can you believe those dummies charged me for the cup?
咬肉干
Bite that jerky!
天啊我怎么沦落至此
Oh, God, what is my life?!
你要刮刮乐吗
Okay, you want some scratchers?
正版好莱坞帽子
A real authentic Hollywood Hat?
还是盗版小金人
Or -- Ooh! The fake Oscar?
我要小金人
I'll take the Oscar.
我搬到洛杉矶就是想成为演员
I moved to LA to become an actress!
拿走小金人
Take it away. Get -- Get -- ?
藏起来
Hide it.
他居然不在
I can't believe I'm alone.
我明白
I get it.
这不是你想象中的样子对吧
This isn't how you pictured it, right?
你和我的情况有点不一样
I mean, it was a little different with me
因为我知道我会一个人生下孩子
because I always knew I was gonna be having my baby alone.
所以我决定在到处都是超重
So I decided to give birth in a place
出汗的迷惘人群中分娩
filled with other overweight, sweaty, lost souls...
维加斯
Vegas, baby.
我当时怀孕九个月了而且一直在赢钱
I was nine months pregnant, and I was on a hot streak.
蓝眼小哥
Blue eyes.
我在分娩
I'm in labor.
法律规定我必须为你叫一辆救护车
I'm legally required to call you an ambulance.
道德规定我再扔一个七
And I'm morally required to roll another seven!
我去生个孩子马上回来
I'm gonna go have this baby, but I'll be right back!
突然我就在陌生城市的病房♥里
And suddenly, I was in this hospital room in a strange city
无亲无友
with no friends or family.
感觉这主意就不怎么样了
And this didn't seem like such a good idea anymore.
父亲在吗
Is the father here?
只有我
It's just me.
我真的孤身一人
I was truly alone.
不只是在维加斯或者医院
Not just in Vegas or the hospital.
而是人生中
But in life.
四五
Four, five.
使劲使劲使劲使劲
?Come on, push, push, push, push.
但后来发生了一件很棒的事情
But then, an amazing thing happened.
我发现我并不孤独
I realized I wasn't alone.
他一直陪伴着我
He had been there with me the whole time.
然后真正的奇迹降临了
And then a true miracle occurred.
给你带了个东西
Brought you something.
他的第一个玩具
His first toy.
我觉得你还想要这个
I also thought you would want this.
我的钱
My money!
到妈妈这来
Come to mama.
谢谢格雷厄姆