老爸有招

Man with a Plan S01E19

Part 3 April 12, 2020, 10:02 a.m.

I should let Lisa know that this pot of honey
已经有了一头凶狠美丽的母熊
already has a mean, beautiful she-bear.
我明天打给她
I'm gonna call her tomorrow.
什么不我觉得你完全不该找她
What? No, I don't think you should do that at all.
我觉得你应该忘掉这事
I think you should just let it go.
丢掉吞下藏起来
Drop it, choke it, put it in a sack,
扔进河里
throw it in the river.
不我明天打给她
Nah, I'm gonna call her tomorrow.
好孩子
Yeah, good boy.
回家吧给你奖励
Now, let's go home for your reward.
我的大母熊在狩猎了
My she-bear's on the prowl.
你是个好老公大唐
You're a good husband, Don.
你做什么
What are you doing?
你在做什么
What are you doing?
如果他打给丽莎小商场的工程就完了
If he calls Lisa, the mini-mall project is dead.
为什么因为她并没有勾引我哥
Why? Because she didn't seduce my brother.
那是我
I did!
-所以你给大唐送了个高级礼物篮 -对
-So you sent Don a fancy gift basket? - Right.
然而母亲节你给我送了个香肠麦满分
And for Mother's Day, you got me a Sausage McMuffin.
我们就不能着眼于当前的问题吗
Can we stick to the problem at hand, huh?
大唐会打给我们的老板
Don is gonna call our boss
结束一段她根本不知道的关系
and break off a relationship
因为这段关系根本不存在
she doesn't know exists because it doesn't exist.
知道吗而这事要是发生了
Okay? And when that happens,
小商场就完蛋了
the mini-mall is dead.
所以你得做正确的事
Well, then you need to do the right thing.
我同意
I agree.
那是啥
What is that?
你得继续撒谎
You have to keep lying.
你现在说的
Is this one of those times
是不是反话
where you say one thing, but you mean the opposite?
就好像你当时说你再也不会
Like when you said you'd never bring up
提起母亲节麦满分事件
the Mother's Day McMuffin again?
现在你既要保护大唐
Look, right now, you need to protect
又要保护你们的小商场项目
both Don and the mini-mall job.
现在是时候加倍下注了宝贝
It's time to double down, babe.
我喜欢你这一面
I like this side of you.
我教你接下来怎么做
Okay. Here's how you handle it, all right?
你再给大唐送一封丽莎写的条子
You send Don another note from Lisa
说我们心里的感情必须保密
and say, "We have to keep our feelings a secret
永不再讨论连对方也不可以说
and never discuss them, not even with each other."
太聪明了
That's clever.
等一下
Yeah-- wait.
你这么擅长操纵别人
Should I be worried about how good you are
我是不是该担心一下
at manipulating people?
什么
What?
亲爱的你这么聪明我怎么会这样对你
Honey, you're way too smart for that.
为派对做的准备看起来不错
All this party stuff looks great.
夏威夷那地方真的有猴子吗
Do they even have monkeys in Hawaii?
吹这玩意都快把我吹晕了它们必须有
Well, I almost passed out blowing them up, so they do now.
我们的无酒精鸡尾酒好像买♥♥多了
We may have overdone it with the virgin daiquiris.
-屋里还有好多呢 -挺好的
- There’s a ton left inside. - Good.
一会儿我们混点朗姆酒进去
Later, we'll mix in some rum and celebrate Emme
庆祝艾米有了好一年级老师
getting the good first grade teacher.
亲爱的唐我们一定要将我们的感情保密
"Dear Don, we have to keep our feelings a secret
永远不要谈论连彼此都不要提
"And never discuss them, not even with each other.
我知道你也许想谈但不该谈丽萨
"I know you may want to, but you shouldn't. Lisa.
另提都別提
P.S. Don't talk to me about this."
我看这番话的意思是
And I may be reading between the lines, but sounds to me--
我个人看法
this is just me--
感觉你不应该打电♥话♥给她
it sounds like you shouldn't call her.
没必要
Well, no need to.
你进来之前
Right before you got in,
我已经给她寄了花附带朦胧小纸条
I sent her some flowers with a steamy note.
你给她寄花了
You sent her flowers?
为什么
Why would you do that?
因为我有思考
Because I got to thinking.
你为什么要思考
Why would you do that?
我们绝对不能把这个小商场项目搞砸
We can't afford to screw up this mini-mall gig,
我必须吊着她的胃口
so I need to keep her on the hook.
论打太极亚当你面前的可是张三丰
It's a dance, Adam, and you're looking at Beyonce.
才不是
No, I'm not!
洛厄尔
Lowell?
你没事吧
You okay?
好呀
Hiya.
你怎么了
What's the matter with you?
睡着了
I must've dozed off.
我喝了几杯无酒精鸡尾酒
I had a few virgin daiquiris.
这鸡尾酒真是开心果
They made me happy.
让我变成了糊涂蛋又成了瞌睡虫
Then dancy, then sleepy.
今天我一人分饰七个小矮人
I've been every dwarf today.
天啊
Oh, my God.
这里面有酒精
There's alcohol in here.
这就说得通了
That explains a lot.
怎么会呢
How can that be?
标签写着呢无酒精［处♥女♥座］
I mean, t-the label says "Virgin."
什么
What?
这是热带处♥女♥座牌的鸡尾酒
it's Tropical Virgin brand daiquiri.
不是热带无酒精鸡尾酒
It's not tropical virgin daiquiri.
好孩子们还在集♥合♥
Okay, the kids are still at assembly.
在他们喝醉我被警♥察♥抓走之前还有15分钟
I have 15 minutes before they get drunk and I get arrested.
等等安迪
Wait, Andi.
干嘛
What?
-你回来的时候给我带点玉米饼－天啊
- On your way back, pick up some tacos. - Oh, my...
好的
Okay.
早上好
Good morning.
你在干嘛
What are you doing?
我在跟大家问早上好
I'm just wishing everyone good morning.
对好了我得走了
Yeah. Okay, got to go.
先去找会计然后人力资源
I'm off to accounting, then HR.
他们都够呆板的
What a bunch of stiffs they are.
花是给我的吗
Are those flowers for me?
不是不是给另一个叫丽萨的
Uh, no, no, different Lisa.
你拿着花在我的办公室里
So, you're in my office with flowers
而花是送给另一个叫丽萨的人
for a different person named Lisa?
对
Yes.
丽萨·玛丽·普雷斯利
Lisa... Marie Presley.
对我可喜欢她了
Yeah. I'm a big fan, yeah.
她来了没
Is she in yet?
好的同学们我们的夏威夷烤猪大餐开始
Okay, everyone, it's time to start our Hawaiian luau.
不
No!
这里面有酒精
Is there alcohol in this?
对不过好消息是
Yes, but... the good news is:
没有孩子是开车来的所以
none of the kids are driving, so...
所以因为你那个戴鱼领带的男人
So, because of you, fish tie guy
以为我喜欢他
thinks I have the hots for him.
你知道这样有多不专业吗
Do you have any idea how unprofessional all this is?
我感觉到了一点
I have a sense.
听着我一直努力让项目继续
Look, I was just trying to keep the project on track
还要保护我哥的感觉
and protect my brother's feelings.
结果你两样都没做到
Well, turns out you can't do both.
那这样吧
Then you know what?
我明白这场投资会议有多重要
I get that this investor meeting's important,
但条件是这样的
but here's the deal:
我和大唐共进退要么一起去要么都不去
either Don and I do it together or we don't do it at all.
这就是你要说的
And that's your bottom line?
对我要走了
Yep. I'll walk away.
行啊
Okay.
我走着呢
I'm walking.
这就走了
Here I go.
別拦着我