老爸有招

Man with a Plan S01E06

Part 2 April 12, 2020, 10 a.m.

有吗
Are you?
好你们三个待着别动
Okay, you three stay put.
你能从冰箱给我拿个酸奶吗
Will you get me a Go-Gurt from the fridge?
什么冰箱
What fridge?
看
See?
这一套我也会
Two can play at that game.
什么这一套
What game?
那怎么回事
What is going on in there?
他们以前也这样拒绝合作吗
Have they ever stonewalled you like that before?
有过几次
Well, yeah, a few times,
不过我有一招
but I always had a move.
是什么
What was it?
等爸爸回家了再说
"Wait until your father gets home."
我已经在家了
I'm already home.
对啊所以我们现在才在厨房♥
Yes, that's why we're in the kitchen.
我不敢相信他们联合起来了
I can't believe they formed an alliance.
我觉得还挺有爱的
Well... it's actually kind of sweet.
我一直都让他们要团结一致
I mean, I am always telling them to stick together.
谁知道砸了自己脚
Who knew it would backfire?
当家长太难了
Parenting's hard.
好好好等一下
Okay, okay, okay. Hold on.
他们这么团结我们得让他们分♥裂♥ 对不
If they're sticking together, we got to split 'em up, right?
对
Yes.
让他们明白最有利的选择
And make them understand it's in their best interest
是跟我们站在一起
to be on our team.
那我们要用什么办法威逼还是利诱
So what are we gonna use, threats or bribes?
威逼不要钱先来两斤的
Uh, well, threats are free. Let's start with those.
好
Good.
看啊
Oh, look,
凯蒂的奖杯
Katie's trophy from when her volleyball team
她的排球队赢了区域赛
won regional's. Hmm.
我们女儿真的很爱排球
Our girl really does love her volleyball,
是嘛
doesn't she? Mmm.
你们在干吗呢
What are you guys doing?
你
You, uh,
你马上要参加一个排球训练营对吧
you have a volleyball camp coming up, don't you?
对
Yeah.
我真是不想让你因为禁足给错过了
Boy, I'd hate for you to get grounded
就因为墙上这个破洞
and miss it, just because of some stupid hole in the wall.
我不想错过训练营
I don't want to miss my camp.
这就对了
Here we go.
因为
I mean,
如果我不去训练营
if I don't go to camp,
会挺替你们惋惜的
I'd feel bad for you guys.
什么意思
Um, what's that?
那个周末泰迪和艾玛
That's the weekend Teddy and Emme are supposed to
不是要去爷爷奶奶家吗
stay at Grandma and Grandpa's.
你们就能好好地过二人世界了
You guys are gonna have the whole house to yourself.
我们去走廊说两句
Can I see you in the hall?
我们周末能单过了
We are getting our weekend alone.
就算他们把房♥子烧了我都不管
I don't care if they burn the house down.
我们根本不该从凯蒂开始
And we never should have started with Katie,
这个错误太低级了
that was a rookie mistake.
你说得对
You're right.
她太精了
She's too smart.
我们要从笨的开始
We need to go to the dumb one.
我才不觉得我们哪个孩子笨
Hey, hey. I don't think any of our kids are dumb.
不过我跟你一起去泰迪的房♥间
But I will follow you to Teddy's room.
这房♥间太挤了
Boy, is this room crowded.
其实吧
You know,
你要是住在凯蒂的房♥间
if you had Katie's room,
就会有地方安装好你的所有玩具
you'd have space to set up all your toys.
不过你说凯蒂住大房♥间
But, you said Kate gets the bigger room
因为她年纪最大
because she's older.
她已经享受过了
Ah, she's had her time.
告诉我们是谁弄的洞
Tell us who made the hole,
大房♥间就归你了
the room is yours.
凯蒂说我没有代理人在场的情况下
Kate said I shouldn't answer any questions
不能回答任何问题
without representation.
他要请律师
He's trying to lawyer up.
等一下你上哪学的代理人这个词
Wait, where did you learn the word "Representation"?
凯蒂写在我手上的
Kate wrote it on my hand.
你到底说不说
Are you gonna talk or not?
不说
No.
我们去走廊讨论一下
Can I see you in the hallway? Mm-hmm.
这孩子跟凯蒂待了一小时
That boy has learned more in an hour with Katie,
比他在学校五年学的都多
than he has in five years of school.
现在怎么办
What now?
现在只剩一个孩子了
We've only got one kid left.
我都不知道还有什么好讨论的
I don't even know why we stopped in the hall this time.
有道理
Yeah.
我们来聊聊圣诞老人吧
Let's talk a little bit about Santa Claus. Hmm?
你淘气的时候他会知道
He knows when you've been naughty
你乖巧的时候他也知道
and he knows when you've been nice.
你现在有没有什么事
So, is there something
想告诉我们的
you want to tell us right now?
这样
I mean...
圣诞老人会对你刮目相看的
could really help you out with the big guy.
我跟圣诞老人目前的状态挺好的
I'm comfortable with my relationship with Santa.
-走廊 -走廊
- Hall. - Hall.
你们想去我房♥间看电影吗
Hey, do you guys want to watch a movie in my room?
能让我选看什么吗
Yeah, can I pick the movie?
当然
Of course.
我只想跟你们一起玩
I just want to hang out with you guys.
不可置信
Unbelievable.
你看见他们多开心了吗
Did you see how happy they are?
他们当然开心了
Of course they're happy,
刚把我们打败
they just kicked our ass.
这对他们来说就是庆功宴
That was like a victory dinner for them.
我们得重新想办法了
Okay, okay, we got to regroup.
威逼没反应利诱没上钩
We tried bribery, we tried threats.
下一步该怎么做
What's our next move?
我也不知道要不直接把洞填起来
I don't know, maybe we should just patch the hole,
所有人禁足这事就算过了
ground 'em all and move on.
总有一天真♥相♥会水落"石"出
I mean, eventually, the truth'll just slip out.
你吞的那颗软弹也会水落"屎"出
Like that Nerf dart you ate.
他们在墙上开洞还不解释原因
We cannot live in a world where holes are made
我们不能得过且过
and not explained.
会失去所有的威信
We'll lose all credibility.
你说得对我错了
I know, I'm sorry,
我就是太累了
it's just I'm so tired.
好来吧
Okay, all right.
我们好好想想
We got to think.
好
Okay, um...
这样
All right.
如果我们小时候做出这种事
What would happen if we pulled
会发生什么
something like this when we were kids?
我之前就这么想的
It worked on me.
最后成功了吗
Did it?
没有
No.
而且我们根本吓不住他们
Yeah, and we're nothing to be scared of.
我们就跟商场警卫一样
We're like mall cops.
记不记得以前老唐家孩子胡闹
Remember how we used to laugh
我们当时还总是偷笑
when your brother Don's kid would act up?
那熊孩子总是闯祸
That kid was always in trouble.
现在呢去搬运移♥动♥厕所了
Now? Delivering Porta-Potties.
等下
Hey, wait a minute.
也许可以用这招
Maybe we can use that.
明白吗
You know,
让他们展望一下自己的未来
give our kids a little glimpse into their future.