老爸有招

Man with a Plan S01E09

Part 4 April 12, 2020, 10 a.m.

And I hope that one day,
我们回想起今天发生的事情就觉得好笑
we'll can look back on this and laugh.
我什么都听你的你说什么就是什么
I'll do whatever you want.
同时我也希望这个小小的误会
A-And I also hope that this little misunderstanding
不会给安迪的工作造成任何的困扰
won't cause a problem with Andi's job.
不会不会她的工作很安全
No, no, her-- her job is safe.
我们可能要严格执行
Uh, we may tighten up our
"工作场所禁止配偶进入"政策了
"No spouses at work" Policy.
安迪你这是在干什么
Andi, what are you doing to me?
我也不知道
I don't know.
我给你说我有个工作上的男性朋友的时候
Okay, w-when I mentioned that I had a guy friend at work,
你好像并不怎么关心
you didn't seem to care.
不关心
Didn't care?
我太关心了好吗
Well, I cared a lot!
我都快要疯掉了
I was going crazy!
那你怎么不说点什么呀
Well, why didn't you say something?
因为你最讨厌我吃醋了
Because you hate it when I get jealous.
我讨厌你吃醋是在我们20岁的时候
Well, I hated it when we were in our 20s
那时候追我的人多了去了
and guys were hitting on me all the time.
追你的人多了去了
Guys were hitting on you all the time?
都是些什么人高不高
Who were these guys? Are they tall?
这才是我期待的反应嘛
See, that's what I was looking for.
什么
What?
小小地吃点醋也挺好的
Well, a little jealousy is nice.
从什么时候开始了
Wha-- since when?
很显然我年纪越大要求的就越多
Apparently, the older I get, the more I'm gonna need.
好啊
Good...
因为我也厌倦了假装
'cause I am tired of pretending
掩盖我自己的本性
to be someone I'm not.
我就是爱吃醋
I'm a jealous man.
我再给你说件事
And I'll tell you another thing:
我不喜欢吃甘蓝
I don't like kale.
我也不喜欢吃甘蓝
I don't like kale, either.
那我们干嘛要吃这些碎草
Then why are we eating yard clippings?
因为我们应该要喜欢吃甘蓝
Because we're supposed to like it.
就像我应该要发自内心地自信
Just like I'm supposed to get my confidence from the inside
而你应该要对我们的婚姻充满信心
and you're supposed to be so secure in our marriage
不管我和谁交朋友都不用担心
that you don't care who I'm friends with.
听起来像是法国人干的事情
That sounds like something they do in France!
这里可是美国
This is America, damn it.
我们就是爱吃醋没有安全感讨厌甘蓝
We are jealous, insecure, kale haters.
我爱你
I love you.
我也爱你
I love you, too.
顺便说一句
Oh, by the way,
我给罗德里格兹老师发了张性感照片
I texted Mrs. Rodriguez a sexy photo of myself.
还发了"爆你"
And, uh, the word "Salami."
可能到时候会有些麻烦
So, there might be some fallout from that.
但是呢来先抱抱
But, uh, okay, here we go.
如果他不是你真的老公就眨两下眼
这件事之后
So, after all of this,
我们决定要对对方绝对诚实
we have decided to be completely honest with each other.
没错不留任何秘密
That's right, no more secrets.
这主意不错老唐我们也应该这么做
I like that, Don. We should do that, too.
我早就想到了亲爱的
Hey, I'm way ahead of you, baby.
所以我才告诉你亚当的秘密小船
That's why I told you about Adam's secret boat.
老唐
Don!
什么船
W-What boat?
你说不留秘密的
You said there's no secrets.
我的意思是不要有新的秘密
I meant no new secrets.
等等你没跟我商量就买♥♥了艘船
Wait, you bought a boat without telling me?
有好戏看喽
Ooh, that's bad.
是吗
Oh, yeah?
玛茜老唐给你的订婚戒指
Marcy, Don bought your engagement ring
是在殡仪馆买♥♥的
from a mortician.
什么
What?
这个更厉害哦
Oh, that's worse!
去世的人又不需要这个戒指了
Hey, the dearly departed didn't need it anymore.
反正戒指又不是从她手指上砍下来的
It's not like they cut it off her finger.
有什么好笑的吗
What's so funny?
你最近有看看车子副驾驶的门吗
Have you looked at your passenger side door lately?
没有怎么了
No, why?
你自己看看
What happened there?
如果你觉得我很性感就按下喇叭
老唐干的好事
Don.
肯定是报复我说了殡仪馆的事
I bet that's payback for the mortician.
"如果你觉得我很性感就按下喇叭"
"Honk if you think I'm sexy."
但是没有一个人冲我按喇叭
Hey, I didn't get a single honk!
我开车再出去溜一圈
I'm going back out there.
如果你觉得我很性感就按下喇叭