老爸有招
Man with a Plan
第一季
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老爸有招
Man with a Plan S01E12
Part 3
April 12, 2020, 10:01 a.m.
你不告诉我 我是不会罢休的
I'm not gonna drop it until you tell me.
你不会有想法
You won't judge?
有也不会表现出来 如何
You won't know if I do, how about that?
昨晚
Last night,
我梦到你丈夫了
I had a dream about your husband.
是比较...
It was...
限制级的
Cinemax-y.
我和亚当正在
And Adam and I were,
你懂的 动次打次
you know, boom-chucka-chucka.
还带音效的
And sound effects.
想不到你把整个展品展示都做出来了
Wow. I can't believe you got the whole presentation done.
而且你是怎么让秃鹰落在我肩膀的
And how did you get a bald eagle to land on my shoulder?
我首先做的是相信那是可能的
The first thing I did was believe it was possible.
你确定唐会接受它吗
Hey, are you sure Don's gonna be okay with this?
当他看到这个 他会爱上它的
Oh, when he sees this, he is gonna be more than okay with it.
老唐的事就交给我吧
You know what, let me worry about Don, okay?
我们再看一遍
Let's watch it again.
洛厄尔怎么会在这
What is Lowell doing here?
唐 我以为你今晚有班卓琴课
Don, I thought you had a banjo lesson tonight.
我的老师要在游船上演出
My teacher got a gig on a riverboat.
你来了也好
Well, hey, I'm glad you're here.
来看看洛厄尔的项目展示
Check out Lowell's presentation.
你们就是在干这个
That's what you're doing?
不敢相信你居然背着我搞这种事
I can't believe you would go behind my back.
我是为了我们 为我们拿下这个工程
Well, I'm doing it for us. I'm trying to get us this job.
但我说过不允许
But I forbade it.
我觉得你做错了
Well, I think you were wrong.
我们要投票吗
Should we vote on it?
你们怎么投票 只有两...
How're are you gonna vote on it, there's only the...
别 别提了
Don't-Don't-Don't even.
听着 你在固执己见
Look, you're being pigheaded.
你就看一下吧
Just take a look at it.
不了 我已经看到该看的了
No. I've seen all I need to see.
结果是这样的
Here's what's gonna happen:
我要独自给丽莎·麦卡菲做项目展示
I'm gonna do the presentation to Lisa McCaffrey on my own,
不需要你和你的新死党
without you or your new best friend.
是吗
Oh, really?
你准备固执下去 毁掉我们两个人的机会
So, you're gonna be so stubborn that you ruin it for both of us?
是的 如果你想和她见面
Yes. And if you want a meeting with her,
你可以自己找时间给她涂鳄梨酱
you can go guac her taco on your own time.
好吧 重点是我是你的新死党
Okay, the headline is I'm your new best friend.
哪怕对唐来说 这样反应也太过了
Wow, that sounds like a real overreaction, even for Don.
他真是比骡子还倔
He is stubborn like a mule.
你不能走他后面 他会像骡子尥蹶子
Also like a mule, you can't walk up behind him or he'll kick you.
所以这场争执里有两头骡子
Uh-huh, so there are two mules in this fight.
等等 我怎么是骡子了
Wait, why am I a mule?
拜托 我和你吵过无数次架了 朋友
Oh, please, I have had many a fight with you, my friend.
你说
What, you're telling me
你会因为别人的观点有理有据
that you change your mind when you hear a good argument
而改变主意吗
for the other point of view?
没听过别人说有理有据的观点
Well, I'll let you know when I hear one.
显然 这对唐来说不仅是得到一份工作
Look, obviously for Don, this is about more than getting a job.
有时候事情看上去是一个起因
I mean, sometimes things seem like they're about one thing,
但其实还有别的原因
but they're really about something else.
-你觉得是 -对
- You think? - u202dYeah.
比如罗德里格兹老师对你发春梦
Like... Mrs. Rodriguez had a sex dream about you.
肯定是因为别的原因
That's got to be about something else.
什么
What?!
这个例子你是编出来的还是真的
Did you just make that example up or is that real?
就当我是编的吧
Let's just say I made it up...
但是真的
Ugh. u202d...but it's real.
我还要跟她在学校见面呢
I have to see her at school.
你为什么要告诉我
Why would you tell me that?
因为我想看看
Well, because I wanted to see
她告诉我的时候 我是什么样的表情
what my face looked like when she told me.
所以说
So, you know...
看到了
...got it.
够了 大唐的事已经够让我闹心了
Come on, I already got my hands full with Don.
好吧 我是说
Okay. I mean...
好了 你为什么不试着找出
All right, well, did you even try to find out
大唐究竟在烦什么
what's really bothering Don?
再说一遍
Once again,
你根本不懂男人的做事风格
you have no concept of how men do things.
我们不会问对方感受
Okay? We don't ask about feelings.
感受是很早很早以前
Feelings were invented a long time ago,
发明出来让你们女人在洞穴里
so that women would have something to talk about
有话聊的
back at the cave...
男人都忙着在外面狩猎
...while men were out hunting.
好
Okay.
那你准备怎么做
So, what's your plan?
我准备按老规矩
I'm gonna handle things with Don
处理和大唐之间的问题
the way I always handle things with Don.
就是互相折磨骚扰
By torturing and harassing each other
然后什么都干不成
and never accomplishing anything.
俗称《猫和老鼠》套路
Also known as the Tom-and-Jerry method.
随便你怎么说 但这两个角色席卷了好莱坞
Say what you will, those two guys took Hollywood by storm.
我的椅子呢
Where's my chair?
你可以去移♥动♥厕所里找找
You might want to look in the Porta Potti.
去不了 因为我把移♥动♥厕所
Well, I can't because I had the Porta Potti
拖到你家门口了
towed to your front porch.
你好好享用
Enjoy the smell.
太幼稚了
That is so juvenile.
好吧
Yeah, well...
我满抽屉的果冻
My drawer is full of pudding.
我就不剧透了 但说一声 我做了一堆果冻
I'm not gonna ruin the surprise, but I made a lot of pudding...
放在了各种地方
...and it's in a lot of places.
为什么不能 你以为没有我
Why not? You think you can
你的展示会能成功
do the presentation without my help.
我不是这个意思
That's not what I said.
你说什么 听不到
I'm sorry, I can't hear you.
我耳朵没朝着你听
My ears are facing the other direction.
好吧 就这样
Okay, you know what?
我去外面干活
I'll be outside working.
等你准备好道歉再给我打电♥话♥吧
Call me when you're ready to apologize, huh?
我找到剩下的果冻了
I found the rest of the pudding.
真的吗
Oh, you think so?
快点吧 艾玛
Okay, come on, Emme.
赶快 趁着罗德里格兹老师还没回来
Hurry up before Mrs. Rodriguez gets back.
你瞅啥
What are you looking at?
你瞅啥
What are you looking at?
安迪跟你说了
Andi talk to you?
很不幸 她说了
Unfortunately, yes.
现在我不是冷冰冰了 是吧
I'm not ice-cold now, am I?
以后得找个拼车的送你上学了
We have got to get you in a carpool.
你怎么来了
What are you doing here?
我收到了你的电子邮件
I got an e-mail from you
说你要跟我道歉
saying you wanted to apologize.
赶紧说 我好不接受
Let's hear it so I can say no.
我没给你发过 大狒狒
I didn't e-mail you, you big baboon.
或者我发过
Or did I?
你把手♥机♥落在外面了
You leave your phone out,
于是美好的事情发生了
beautiful things happen.
那我就不待着了
Well, I'm not gonna stay here
既然他不打算道歉
if he's not gonna apologize.
我不会道歉的
Well, I'm not apologizing.
够了 猫和老鼠 行了吧
Okay, all right, Tom and Jerry, that's it.
现在我来做主 都坐好了
I am in charge now. Sit down. Sit down.
好的 显然是有深层矛盾在的
Okay, now, obviously something deeper is going on here,
我们来彻底搞清楚
and we need to get to the bottom of it.
大唐 你为什么这么生亚当的气
Now, Don, why are you so mad at Adam?
老爸有招
Man with a Plan
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