老爸有招

Man with a Plan S01E16

Part 2 April 12, 2020, 10:01 a.m.

我们端咖啡去
and, uh, we'll bring in some coffees?
-好 -我来帮忙
- Yeah. - I'll help.
洛厄尔她真是太优秀了
Wow, Lowell, she's so great.
谁会想到你原来私底下是个泡妞高手
I mean, who knew you were such a secret stud?
谢谢
Thanks.
我还得跟亚当学很多
I still have a lot to learn from Adam.
我不确定
I'm not sure you do.
我真高兴你们喜欢她
Well, I'm glad you guys like her.
我们有了新的酷夫妻朋友
We have a cool new friend couple.
真不敢相信我打算用"孩子病了"这招对付他们
I know, I can't believe we were gonna sick-kid them.
不我们打算用这招对待洛厄尔和穿着裙子的他
No, we were gonna sick-kid Lowell and Lowell in a dress.
快过去和新朋友好好乐乐
Now, let's get in there and party with our new friends.
我们可能可以坚持到10点
We might even stay up past 10:00.
跨年夜那晚就差点成功了
Like we almost did on New Year's Eve.
你们去哪里
Where you guys going?
真是对不起我们刚收到保姆的短♥信♥
Oh, I'm so sorry. We just got a text from our babysitter
我们的女儿不舒服
that our daughter isn't feeling well.
我们得走了
So we have to go.
你们的孩子病了
You have a sick kid?
对她可能得的病和凯蒂的一样
Yeah. She probably has the same thing Kate does.
我相信她的病和凯蒂的完全一样
I'm sure she has exactly the same thing Kate does.
多谢你们
Thanks for everything.
很高兴认识你们
Nice to meet you guys.
我们也是好了再见
You, too. Okay, bye-bye.
你知道刚发生了什么吧
You know what just happened.
对
Yeah.
他们用"孩子病了"这招对付我们
They sick-kidded us.
你还想玩到10点吗
You still want to stay up till 10:00?
就我俩当然不想了
Well, not if it's just us.
洛厄尔的老婆很性感对吗
So, Lowell's wife is a hottie, huh?
她还行
She's all right.
得了
Oh, come on.
性感冒烟了
All right, she's smokin'.
然后她性感到已经超过了能让你生气的程度
And-and-- and she's past the kind of hot that makes you mad.
你就只想给她送礼物我...
You just-- you just want to give her presents. I...
他是怎么找到这种对象的
How do you think he pulled that off?
我知道是怎么回事
Well, I know what it is.
洛厄尔闻起来像个婴儿女人都喜欢婴儿
Lowell smells like a baby and women love babies.
这就是最好的解释了
That's as good an explanation as any.
所以你们还要和那些人一起玩吗
So are you guys gonna hang out with those guys again?
大概不会他们都用了"孩子病了"这一招
Probably not. They sick-kidded us.
扎心啊哥们
Ooh. Ooh, that's rough, man.
我整个人都做好准备要派对一整晚
Yeah, I mean, I was all set for a night of partying
结果成了我一个人穿着浴袍
and then it was just me wandering around the house
在家里转来转去找老花镜
in my robe, looking for my reading glasses.
然后发现在我头上
And they were on my head. Yeah.
你们俩好像
Well, looks like you guys
成了配角夫妇了
are the number two couple now. Yeah.
就好像我们平常一样
Just like we usually are.
你们说什么呢
Oh, what are you talking about?
说真的啊我们在一起玩的时候
Oh, come on. When we hang out,
你们俩夫妻就是主角
you guys are the number one couple
我们是配角
and we're number two.
不是这样的
That's not true.
夫妻又不能排名
And you don't rank couples.
大学和橄榄球队才可以排名
You rank colleges and football teams,
还有悄悄地给自己家的小孩排名
and, secretly, your kids.
你们明白的我们去看电影的时候
You know how it is. When we go to the movies,
你们坐在过道边你们来选吃哪种零食
you get the aisle seats, you get to choose the candy.
你们70岁了吗还爱吃巧克力葡萄干
Raisinets? What are you guys, 70?
我喜欢巧克力葡萄干
I like Raisinets.
我也喜欢那有什么问题
Me, too. Yeah, what's wrong with that?
你们其实可以自己去买♥♥零食的对吧
You know you can buy your own candy, right?
宝贝也许我们应该跟洛厄尔和珍一起玩
Babe, maybe we should get together with Lowell and Jen.
不不不我们抢先了
No, no, no. We call dibs.
我们都已经抢了所有人都听见的
Dibs have been called. Everybody heard it.
你抢先没有用
Well, your dibs have no meaning
因为他们都用"孩子病了"这招了
since they pretended to have a sick kid
来逃避你们了
just to get away from you.
不不不
Wha-- no, no, no, no.
我们还不确定他们是不是装的
We don't know for sure they were pretending.
他们女儿有可能真的病了
Their daughter might have actually been sick.
对啊孩子会生病的常有的事
Yeah, kids get sick. It happens all the time. Yeah.
看你俩在这竭尽全力去给别人当配角
It's just funny to watch you guys get all bent out of shape
也是蛮好笑的
being somebody's number two.
我们才不是配角
We are not number two.
我证明给你看
Yeah, and I'll prove it to you.
我明天去学校接孩子我跟你保证
I'm doing school pickup tomorrow and I guarantee you
-他们的女儿出来的时候肯定是病的 -对
- their daughter is gonna be out sick. - Yeah.
如果那个小女孩病了
Yeah and when that little girl is sick,
我们会大笑的
we are gonna laugh and laugh.
你们知道我什么意思
Well, you know what I mean.
小豆子
Hey, butterbean.
罗德里格兹老师
Hey, Mrs. Rodriguez.
最近如何你那个...
How's it going? How's your, uh...
都如何
whatever you have?
你想干什么伯恩斯
What do you want, Burns?
我就是好奇
Well, uh, I was just wondering,
洛厄尔的女儿今天来学校了吗
uh, was Lowell's daughter in school today?
露西
Lucy?
我也不知道那就露西吧
Well, I don't know. Sure, let's say Lucy.
她今天来了
Yeah, she was here.
什么看起来正常吗
What? And she seemed okay?
-没有流鼻涕 -没有
- No sniffles? - No.
-咳嗽 -没有
- Cough? - No.
水痘什么之类的呢
Pox of any kind?
她挺好的怎么回事
Yeah, she was fine. What's going on?
没什么我就是...
Nothing. I just...
那天晚上我们和洛厄尔和珍一起吃饭
We were at dinner with Lowell and Jen the other night.
他们说女儿病了就提前走了
And they said their daughter was sick and left early.
你被人用"孩子病了"这一招甩了
You got sick-kidded.
这一招就是别人会编个借口...
See, that's when people make up that...
我知道这一招是什么
I know what it is.
然后呢
Well?
她很健康
She's perfectly healthy.
混♥蛋♥
Son of a bitch!
我不敢相信洛厄尔和珍
I can't believe Lowell and Jen would lie
会撒谎说孩子病了
about having a sick kid
逃避和我们相处
just so they wouldn't have to hang out with us.
是啊我们想出这一招的时候好像很机灵
I know, it seemed clever when we thought of it,
可别人用在我们身上的时候就很伤人
but just hurtful when they did it.
你知道这是为什么吗
You know what this is?
他们觉得我们很无聊
They think we're boring.
我们
Us?
无聊
Boring?
无聊的人会去奥兰多吗我可不...
Do boring people go to Orlando? I don't...
我的意思是我们现在不像年轻的时候
I'm just saying, we don't do all the stuff
做各种事了
we used to do when we were younger.
我们可不像以前那么灵活了
Well, we're not as limber as we were back then.
懂吧我的背很不好不能翻身...
You know? I mean, with my back, I can't get around...
不不不不是指那个事不是
No, no, no, not that stuff. No!
这个事情就是这是警钟
This is just-- it... this is a wake-up call.
我讨厌警钟
Oh, I hate wake-up calls.
想想吧
Well, I mean, come on,
我们26岁的时候超酷的
when we were 26, we were super cool.
我们还去酒吧
I mean, we used to hang out at bars,
去音乐会
and-and go to concerts, and...
都不会在电影结束前睡着
stay awake for the end of movies.
马特·达蒙到底有没有从火星上离开
I mean, did Matt Damon ever get off Mars?
我们都不知道
We don't know.