剧集 | 老爸有招 | 导航列表
臭死你们
Enjoy the smell.
凯蒂
Katie!
快啊走了
Come on, let's go!
我也愿意去动物园
You know, I'd go to the zoo
前提是他们让大猩猩开着大卡车到处跑
if they gave gorillas big trucks to drive around in, but...
我估计这辈子我们都看不到了
I don't think we're gonna see that in our lifetime.
在这是看不到
No. Not here.
墨西哥有可能
Maybe Mexico.
他们的猴子法律比较自♥由♥一点
Their monkey laws are more liberal.
怎么了 抱歉
What's up? Oh, sorry, I know
我知道你讨厌别人说这话
you hate when people say that.
内部笑话
Ha-ha. Inside joke.
我喜欢这种气氛
I like our vibe here.
来吧
Okay, come on,
我们去看怪物卡车 走吧
let's go to monster trucks. Come on.
我不是很想去
I don't really feel like it.
不是很想去 什么意思?
What do you mean, you don't really feel like it?
我就是不想去 我很累好吗
I just don't feel like it. I'm tired, okay?
你昨晚睡了15个小时
You slept for 15 hours last night.
你能有多累
How tired can you be?
我能插句话吗
Can I interject?
我有个办法能让所有人开心
I think I have a solution that'll make everybody happy.
快上车
Get in the car!
大唐 让我来处理好吗
Don... will you let me handle this, please?
当然
Sure.
凯蒂
Katie...
快上车
get in the car.
你不能强迫我
You can't make me go.
我已经尽力了 可你一点也没努力
Okay, I am really trying here, but you're not trying at all.
我认为你好得很 只是不想跟我相处
I think you feel fine-- you just don't want to hang out with me.
为什么所有事都得跟你有关
Why do you have to make everything about you?
行了我告诉你 我不喜欢你的态度
All right, you know what? I don't like your attitude.
别去看怪物卡车了 回你房♥间去
Forget monster trucks. Go to your room.
-行啊 -行啊
- Fine. - Fine.
那是什么
What was that?
那是一个成年男性被一个小女孩治了
That was a grown man being manhandled by a little girl.
同志们 再有十分钟
Okay, guys, just ten more minutes
我们就能开始动物园的超级开心日
till our super fun day at the zoo.
泰迪 我会给你零食钱
Oh, and, Teddy, I am gonna give you snack money
让你有生以来第一次
so you can buy a treat all by yourself
自己去买♥♥零食
for the very first time.
里程碑
Milestone.
当当当
Dun, dun, dun.
怎么这么堵
What is with all this traffic?
我看看导航
Let me check the nav.
(重新计算路线中)
AUTOMATED VOICE: Recalculating.
(离目的地还有两小时)
Two hours to destination.
你奶奶给你买♥♥的?
Your grandma bought that for you?
我得找她说说
She's getting a call.
我已经不想对付她了
Okay, I am done trying with her.
她情绪这么大 又不理智
She is moody and irrational.
如果罗伊斯想知道她怎么样
If Royce wants to know what's up...
就是这样 罗伊斯
that's what's up, Royce!
我在按次付费频道找到了怪物卡车
I found some monster trucks on pay-per-view.
五十元看一次
It was 50 bucks.
我一不小心按了订阅键
And I accidentally pushed "Order."
它问"你确定吗"
And when it said, "Are you sure?"
我又一不小心按了确定
I accidentally pushed "Yes."
是凯蒂发来的
Oh. It's from Katie.
现在跟我女儿只能这样交流了
I guess that's how I communicate with my daughter now.
都用文字绕宇宙一圈交流了
We have to bounce words off of spaceships.
"爸爸 我真的很慌
"Dad, I'm really freaked out
因为我刚刚第一次…"
'cause I just got my first..."
我天
Oh, boy.
第一次什么
First what?
就是女人特有的 第一次…
You know, for women only-- her first...
大姨妈
lady-palooza.
什么
What?
我走了
I'm out.
凯蒂 我收到你的信息了 我这就来别着急
Katie! I got your text! Uh, I'll be right up! Don't worry!
我能搞定
I got this!
没问题的
It's okay!
我开冰箱做什么
Why am I going to the fridge?
搞不清楚
No idea. Well... okay.
拿这个
Uh... that.
好吧
Yeah. Okay.
好了 我马上上楼了
Okay, I'm coming up the stairs right now!
爸爸来了
Daddy's here!
凯蒂 凯蒂
Katie? Katie?
我给你带了点东西
Hey. Okay. I brought you some stuff.
这是冰袋 还有一瓶佳得乐
Here's a ice pack and a Gatorade.
那...
So...
应该没问题了 咬咬牙忍♥一忍♥
that'll do that. And, uh, you know, walk it off,
下次争取战胜它们
and you'll get 'em next time!
还需要什么吗
Yeah, uh, do you need anything else?
我可以去药店给你买♥♥点什么
'Cause I can run to the drugstore.
我帮你妈妈买♥♥过一次 挺好玩的
I did it once for Mom. It was super fun.
不用了 妈妈之前给我留了东西了
No. Mom made me a kit a while ago.
太好了 有没有给我留什么指南之类的
Oh, great. Are there any instructions for me?
我现在完全不知道该怎么做了
'Cause I am flying blind here.
要是我现在可以跟妈妈聊聊就好了
It'd be really great if I could talk to Mom.
我给她发了短♥信♥ 但是没回我
I texted her, but she didn't answer.
是啊 这种时候她应该在的
Yeah, she's supposed to be here for this.
而且我和她本来就约定好了
In fact, that was our agreement, okay?
她不遵守约定 所以要是出什么问题了
And she broke it. So anything that goes wrong here,
都是她的错
that is on her.
你能不能给她打个电♥话♥
Can you please just call her?
没问题 打电♥话♥我能行
Yes. I can do that. That is a thing I can do.
我现在下楼打电♥话♥
Okay, I'm gonna go downstairs and make a phone call.
你就... 你就待在这儿
And you just, you stay here
该做什么就做什么
and keep doing what you're doing, you know?
我一会就回来 千万不要慌张
I'll be back. Okay? And don't -- don't panic.
我现在就在给妈妈打电♥话♥了
Okay! I'm calling her right now!
电♥话♥通了
It's ringing!
电♥话♥响了
It's ringing!
搞什么...
What the...?
开什么玩笑
You got to be kidding me.
你好 安迪的语♥音♥信箱
Hey, Andi's voicemail.
我也很抱歉你没有接到我的电♥话♥
I'm sorry you missed me, too.
还记得那件我最害怕
Remember that thing I dreaded most
发生在凯蒂身上的事吗
that was gonna happen to Katie?
现在发生了
Well, it's happening,
然而你却没在
and you are not here.
我们说好了的
We had a deal!
这事儿你负责 而我就负责在泰迪
You were gonna handle this, and I was gonna talk to Teddy
洗澡时间过长的时候跟他谈谈
when he started taking really long showers.
而且你给我的唯一指示
And the only instruction you gave me
就是在凯蒂发生这种事之后给你打电♥话♥
for when this happens to Katie was to call you.
我现在就在跟你打电♥话♥ 但一点用都没有
So I'm calling you, and it's not helping at all.
还有 家里没有健胃消食片了
Oh, and, also, we're out of Pepto.
我又上来了
I'm coming back up!
凯蒂
Katie?
我到走廊上了
I'm coming down the hall.
我进来了 我在你门口了
I'm coming in. I'm at your door.
是这样的
Hey. All right, okay,
我给妈妈打电♥话♥了 但是她忘记带手♥机♥了
I tried to get Mom, but she forgot her phone,
现在就只有你和我了
which leaves you with me.
抱歉
Sorry.
没事 只是我一直以为发生这种事的时候
No, it's just I always pictured Mom being here
是妈妈来陪我
when this happened.
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