老爸有招

Man with a Plan S01E08

Part 1 April 12, 2020, 10 a.m.

妈妈做的午餐很多胡萝卜
Okay, Mom made these lunches. Lot of carrots.
我不吃自然归你了
I won't eat them, so they trickle down to you.
对不起了
Sorry about that.
没事我会插♥进♥鼻孔里大家笑得可开心了
It's okay. I'll just stick them up my nose-- everybody laughs.
凯蒂你好吗
Kate. What's up?
罗伊斯
Hey, Royce.
什么意思伙计
What was that, buddy?
爸他只是说"你好吗"
Dad, he just said "What's up?"
我懂"你好吗" 我用过"你好吗"
I know that "What's up" I've used that "What's up"
我知道"你好吗"的结局是什么
I know where that "What's up?" ends up.
一边儿去罗伊斯
Walk away, Royce.
你害我在大家面前出丑
You just humiliated me in front of everybody.
我在你周围投下了出丑力场
Yeah. I'm creating a humiliation force field all around you
没有男生可以冲进去
that no boy can break.
这些东西对你来说太早了
You're too young for that stuff.
我的天你真是疯了
Oh, my God, you're out of your mind.
她有什么问题
What is her problem?
难道我要允许男生那样和她说话吗
Am I supposed to just let boys talk to her like that?
这是个难办的问题
Well, it's a tough situation.
一方面你得保护你女儿
On one hand, you have to protect your girl.
另一方面罗伊斯是学校红人
On the other hand, Royce is really popular.
你做对了亚当
You did the right thing, Adam.
上次有男人对我说"你好吗"
Last time a guy said "What's up?" to me,
我怀上儿子了
my son was conceived.
我不喜欢这样玛丽
I don't like it, Marie.
她成长得太快了
She's growing up so fast.
我都不认识她了
I don't even know her anymore.
我喜欢他们这么大的时候
I like them when they're this size.
我希望他们永远这么大
I want them to stay this size.
第一次有男生搭讪凯蒂
A boy flirted with Kate for the first time,
我却错过了
and I missed it?
别担心我让她出丑了
Don't worry, I embarrassed her.
所有好玩的都被你抢了
You get to do all the fun stuff.
这事可不好玩
Hey, this wasn't fun.
明白吗我不喜欢她看那个男生的眼神
Okay? I did not like the way she looked at that boy.
和她以前看笑脸薄饼的眼神一样
It's the same way she used to look at smiley face pancakes.
"我要把你全吃掉"
"I'm gonna eat you all up!"
也许女人就是这样
Well, maybe that's what happens with women. You know,
我们开始爱薄饼后来我们就爱男人了
I mean, we start out loving pancakes and then we love men.
结婚后
And then once we're married,
又回头爱薄饼了
it goes back to pancakes.
她不是女人
Okay, she is not a woman.
她是个小女生
She's a little girl.
不再是了她在成长
Not anymore. I mean, she's changing.
所以她才这么暴脾气吗
Is that why she's been so grouchy?
今早我说没有麦片了
I told her we were out of cereal this morning,
她开始像哥斯拉一样横扫一切
and she started knocking things over like Godzilla.
她进入青春期了
Well, she's going through puberty.
她会变得喜怒无常专横
She's gonna be moody and bossy
难懂
and complicated.
你的青春期什么时候结束啊
So when are you gonna finish puberty?
这就是我们回头去爱薄饼的原因
And this is why we circle back to pancakes.
我意思是如果你和想青春期凯蒂
Look, all I'm saying is that if you want to have a relationship
搞好关系你就得打开心扉
with teenage Kate, you're gonna have to open up.
谈谈感觉
Talk about feelings.
什么
What?!
你需要在更有深度更成熟的层次上
You're gonna have to make an effort to connect with her
努力和她沟通
on a deeper, more mature level.
我会想她的
I'm gonna miss her.
你有心情"开聊"吗
Are you, uh... you in the mood to kick it?
爸你为什么这么奇怪
Dad, why are you being weird?
我这不是奇怪听我说
I'm not being weird. Okay, look...
我在你们少女杂♥志♥上看到的
I read in one of your teen magazines
你们喜欢"开聊"
that you guys like to... "Kick it""
你知道的还有
You know? And, uh...
八一八
and have a "Gab-sesh""
爸我不会和你八一八
Dad, I'm not gonna have a gab-sesh with you.
拜托会很有意思的
Aw, come on, it'll be fun.
学校的那个叫罗伊斯的男生
So, this boy at school, Royce,
他算帅哥还是丑男
is he, like, a hottie or a nottie?
我的天
Oh, my God.
我知道你有了些新的感觉
Okay, look, I know you're having all these new feelings,
但罗伊斯是男生
but Royce is a boy.
他只有一种感觉每11秒感觉一次
He's got one feeling, and he gets it about every 11 seconds.
谈话结束
Okay, this conversation is over.
行把小丫头叫下来
Fine. Send the little one down.
我需要一个拥抱
I need a hug.
老爸有招
第一季第八集
听我说
So, get this.
安迪让我和凯蒂谈谈她的感觉
Andi wants me to talk to Katie about her feelings.
谁想谈感觉啊
Oh, who wants to talk about feelings?
憋到死的那一刻
Hold those in until the end.
你知道人刚死那一刻发出的嗓音吧
You know that noise people make right after they die?
那是感觉全出来了
That's all the feelings coming out.
我不这样想
Yeah, I don't think that's what that is.
但谈话是属于安迪和凯蒂的
But talking is Andi's thing with Katie.
如果我想和她沟通
If I want to reconnect with her,
我得找到适合自己的办法
I got to find my thing with Katie.
你们喜欢看怪物卡车
Hey, you guys always like to go see monster trucks.
他们又回镇上了
They're back in town.
她超喜欢怪物卡车
Oh, she loves monster trucks.
我们去年还拍照了
We took this picture there last year.
我说什么她都觉得好笑
And she laughed at everything I said.
那时候她的幽默感强多了
She had a much better sense of humor back then.
知道吗我会带她去
You know what? I'm gonna take her.
很好玛茜出门了我和你们一起去
Great. Marcy's out of town, so I'll come along
冷场时我补上
to fill any awkward silences.
好我买♥♥三张票
Okay. I'll grab us three tickets.
挺好什么
Yeah. Wha...?
慢着
Wait a minute.
你是故意说这个主意
Did you just come up with this idea
好让我带你去看怪物卡车吧
so I would take you to monster trucks?
亚当
Aw, Adam.
当然了
Of course I did.
凯蒂和大唐和我
Okay, Katie and Don and I
现在去看怪物卡车
are headed to the monster trucks.
好那既然你们要出去
Great. And since you guys are gonna be out,
我就带两个小的去动物园
I'm gonna take the little ones to the zoo.
也可以让他们玩玩电脑
Or... you could put them on their computers
你就休息一下午
and take the afternoon off.
别假了我们明明都会这样做
Come on, we both know we do it.
我想带他们去
No, I want to. I mean, I feel like
感觉自从我回去上班
ever since I went back to work,
他们的成长里程碑都让你一个人经历了
you've been getting all the milestones.
像凯蒂和那个男孩的事艾玛学会了系鞋带
I mean, Katie and that boy, Emme learned to tie her shoes...
泰迪会乘自动扶梯了
Teddy figured out escalators.
他下扶梯的时候还是有点悬
He's still a little shaky on the dismount,
不过他会克服的
but he'll get there.
妈妈我能带我新的呼噜宝宝去动物园吗
Mommy, can I bring my new Purr Baby to the zoo
让他也见见其他的动物
so he can meet the other animals?
呼噜宝宝是说我
Purr Baby! That's me!
还会说话真可爱
Oh, it talks! Cute!
我讨厌那玩意
I hate it.
泰迪别这样
Teddy, be nice.
艾玛有最喜欢的新玩具了
Emme's got a new favorite toy.
里程碑
Milestone.
很高兴见到你们
Great to see you, guys.
他们不会去的是吧
They're not coming, are they?
不去他们要去动物园
No, no, they're going to the zoo.
一帮傻瓜
Ha-ha-ha. Suckers.