老爸有招

Man with a Plan S01E13

Part 2 April 12, 2020, 10:01 a.m.

咱们别纠结细节了好吗
Let's not get bogged down in details, okay?
听我说如果
You know what? Look, look, look, if...
如果凯蒂开始看孩子我们随时想出门都行
if Katie starts babysitting, we can go out whenever we want.
我们可以重新做回随性开心的情侣
All right? We can be that spontaneous, happy couple
就和被孩子们毁掉一切之前一样
we used to be before the kids, you know, ruined everything.
我觉得在家陪孩子很开心
I think it's fun to stay home with the kids.
他们听不到你可以说实话
They can't hear you. You can tell the truth.
今晚可以试试吗
Look, can we just try it for tonight?
好的好的
Okay, fine. All right?
但如果我们离开后家里出了什么事
But if anything goes wrong at the house while we're gone,
凯蒂做保姆这件事将被列为
Katie babysitting goes on the list of things
不允许你再跟我提的事
you are not allowed to ask me to do again.
当然当然
Okay, sure, sure, sure.
我把这事和跳伞
I'll put it next to skydiving
还有跨年夜我想做的事记在一起
and that thing I tried on New Year's Eve.
我们
Now, let's...
在你改变主意前我们快点
let's do this before you change your mind, okay?
你在跨年夜也是这样说的
That's what you said on New Year's Eve.
凯蒂你妈妈和我决定让你照看孩子
Katie, your mother and I have decided to let you babysit.
真的吗太棒了
Yay! Really?! That's amazing!
-我不会让你们失望的我保证 -好的
- I won't let you down, I promise. - Okay. All right.
但我有些规定
But I have some rules, all right?
不许乱跑不许乱跳不许攀爬不许打架
No running, no jumping, no climbing, no fighting,
不许咬人不许做饭知道吗
no biting, no cooking, all right?
而且不要尝试新东西
A-And no trying anything for the first time.
如果不是很擅长的就不要做
If you're not already great at it, don't do it, okay?
听着
Okay, listen,
如果有需要打给我别打给你妈妈
if you need anything, you call me, not your mother, me.
-知道吗 -知道了
- Got it? - Got it.
好了
Okay. And...
如果有需要打给我
if you need anything, you call me, okay?
-再见妈妈 -再见爸爸
- Bye, mom. - Bye, dad.
-乖乖的再见 -对了把门锁上
- Be good, bye! - Oh, and lock this door.
谁敲门也别开
Don't answer this door.
不能开门
Nothing with doors.
开门等于找死
Doors equal death.
现在你死了
And you're dead.
老爸有招
第一季第十三集
现在给家里打电♥话♥会不会太早
Do you think it's too early to call home?
亲爱的我们刚离开家6分半钟
Honey, we left six and a half minutes ago.
孩子们有人看着你就不能放轻松吗
The kids are in good hands, will you just relax?
好吧只要家里没什么事
Okay, well, as long as everything is fine at home,
我就没事
I'm fine. Well...
我喜欢这里
I like this place.
-很高档 -是
- It's fancy. - Yeah.
我去女厕所的时候
You know, when I went to the ladies' room,
-发现马桶盖是热的 -是啊
- the toilet seat was heated. - Yeah.
而不是因为之前有人坐过
And not from somebody else sitting on it.
还有由于我只给凯蒂每小时3美元
Oh, and, since I'm only paying Katie three dollars an hour,
我就可以给咱们点倒数第二便宜的酒了
I am gonna order us the second cheapest bottle of wine.
-有需要吗 -我们订了两位用餐
- Hi, may I help you? - Yeah, we have a reservation for two.
伯恩斯
Burns.
我刚刚接待了叫伯恩斯的客人
Oh, I just seated the Burns party.
我怎么不记得有这事
I think I would've remembered if that happened.
那是老唐吗
Is that Don?
是
Yes.
那个七尺高的嚎猴抢了我们的桌子
That seven-foot howler monkey stole our table.
你坐我们的桌子干什么
What the hell are you doing at our table?
我打赌说你找不到临时保姆
I took a gamble you wouldn't find a babysitter.
我算是押上了我的婚姻
I kind of bet my marriage on it.
好吧玛茜在看我呢
Okay, well, Marcy's looking at me,
快把你的谎言讲给我
so tell me all the lies quickly.
我告诉她我请你们来给她惊喜
I told her I invited you guys here to surprise her.
而且你们正在吵架所以看起来很火大
And that you're fighting, and that's why you looked mad.
好吧但你必须给我们买♥♥
Okay, fine, but you are buying us
倒数第三便宜的酒
the third cheapest bottle of wine.
没问题
No problem.
那是不可能的
I'm not doing that.
不好是凯蒂打来的
Oh, no, Katie's calling me.
凯蒂你没事吧
Katie, hey. Are you okay?
我们很好
Uh, yeah, we're fine.
保险丝好像又断了灯都不亮了
I think that fuse blew again, the lights went out.
你只需要重新打开断路开关
Oh, oh, you just have to reset the breaker.
你知道开关盒在哪吧车♥库♥的墙上
You know where the breaker box is out on the garage wall?
你指的是那个"我绝对不能动"的东西吗
Yeah, you mean that thing you told me to touch never ever?
那是你4岁时你现在年龄已经够大了
That was when you were four, but you're old enough now.
对了打开它之前
Just-- but, uh, before you open it,
敲敲上面的盖子
bang your hand on the cover
把里面的蜘蛛先吓跑
a couple of times to scare the spiders.
蜘蛛我们还是等你回来再通电吧
Spiders? We'll just leave the power off till you come home.
不行不行不行
No, no, no, no, no, if...
如果你妈妈到家时发现没电
if the power's off when Mom gets home,
我俩就再也没法回归正常生活了
we'll never get our spontaneous life back.
这是什么意思
What are you talking about?
30年以后你就明白了
You'll understand in 30 years.
这样吧我马上到家
You know what? I'll be home in a minute.
听着我要回家一趟
Okay, listen, I got to run home,
不能让安迪知道凯蒂打电♥话♥叫我回去
but Andi can't know that Katie called or that I left,
帮我顶一下
so cover for me, all right?
就告诉她...
Tell her that, uh...
你就说看到我跑进厕所了
Tell her you saw me running into the bathroom.
懂了你满头大汗双手捂着屁♥股♥
Yeah, got it. You were sweating, your hands were on your butt.
对吗然后嘴里喊着"上帝救救我吧"
Right? And you were screaming, "Oh, Lord help me."
什么不是的
What? No, no!
有什么问题太宗教了吗
What's the matter? Too religious?
大家好是我
Hey, hi, everyone. Okay, it's just me.
大家还好吗你好吗好吗好的
Hi. How's everybody doing? You good? Good? Okay.
在玩桌游呢真棒好的很好
Playing a board game, that's nice. All right, good.
我要出去弄一下断路开关
Just gonna run out here and trip the breaker.
好了没什么只需要一瞬间
All right, nothing-- will only take a second.
好的
Okay.
一瞬间灯就会亮
Lights will be on in a second.
灯都亮起来了很好
And the lights are back on. Yeah.
好了好的很好我可以...
Okay, all right, that's good. And I can...
我身上有只蜘蛛
see that there's a spider on me!
唐邀请你们来给我惊喜真是太好了
This is so fun that Don invited you guys here to surprise me.
是的我们都很惊喜
Yeah, we're all surprised.
我错过了什么
Hey, what'd I miss?
你的肚子怎么样了
Hey, how's your tummy?
唐说你不得不在失物招领处
Don said you had to borrow a pair of pants
借一条裤子穿
from the lost and found.
多谢你唐
Thanks, Don.
没有只是肚子不舒服
No, it was just an upset stomach,
我现在好了我们开始享受夜晚吧
but I feel great so, uh, let's get out night started.
可以邀请你共舞吗
May I have this dance?
情人节快乐
Happy Valentine's Day.
这是为你们私人定制的香槟杯
Here are your personalized champagne glasses
已经包括在情侣双人套餐中了
that were included in your lovers package for two.
上面为什么印着亚当和安迪
Why do they say Adam and Andi?
什么
What?
不应该印着我们的名字吗
Well, shouldn't they have our names on them?
你已经提前预定了吧
I mean, you did make the reservation.
还是有什么别的我不知道的事
Or is there something going on that I should know about?
这简直是欺负人
Just that this is an outrage!
真有趣
This is fun.
是你的手♥机♥在震吗
Is that your phone buzzing?
是凯蒂吗
Oh, is it Kate?
我看一下
Well, let me check.
凯蒂
不是
no...
不是不是