神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S01E18

Part 3 Oct. 1, 2020, 12:39 p.m.

What have you done?
你干的什么蠢事
Nothing gets you smiling like cold-blooded vengeance.
冷血复仇是让你微笑的不二法门啊
And now, the piece de resistance.
现在上主菜
A magnificent bag of hair.
一大包头发
Oh, this is disgusting.
呃真恶心
It's perfect.
真完美
Ooh, check... check this out.
哦看看这个
I'm Tom Selleck. Park my chopper on the beach.
我是Tom Selleck 我的直升机停在沙滩上
I'm a Billy goat.
我是一头公山羊
Oh, I think I swallowed a bunch of stranger hair.
我刚刚吞了一坨陌生人的头发
Mr. Henders, the King of the lobby.
Henders先生公♥寓♥之王
Jake, the co-op board meeting was an hour ago.
Jake 合作公♥司♥理事会会议是一小时前的事了
I know. I am so sorry.
我知道非常抱歉
It's just I've been pretty busy with police work, you know,
只是因为警务缠身你懂的
with my police friends,
和我的警局小伙伴
helping out non-police folk such as yourself,
帮助像你这样的平民百姓
keeping you safe police.
保证你们安全
We appreciate your service.
感谢你们的服务
And I appreciate you saying that.
感谢您的夸奖
Look, I know there's been a lot of misconceptions about my financial situation,
听着我知道有很多关于我财政状况的误解
but I am ready to put that to rest right now.
但是我准备好让那些都消停了
Boom goes the dynamite. Oh, my God.
出大招美金炸♥弹♥接好天呐
That's $20,000 right there,
这是两万美金
and I intend to use it as a down payment on a mortgage.
我打算用它做按揭的首♥付♥
Where did you get this money?
你从哪弄来的钱
Just had it lying around.
以前就有了
You've been an adequate tenant.
你已经有资格租这个房♥子了
Adequate. But we needed a completed application
有资格但是最迟今天提交完整的申请
with a bank loan by today.
附带银行贷款证明
With all due respect, sir, that's not fair.
恕我直言先生这不公平
I mean, I didn't even know that the building was going co-op until last week.
我是说上周我才知道这房♥子要被合作公♥司♥收回了
I got one letter.
我只收到了一封通知信
We left you 15 voicemails as well.
还有15条语♥音♥留言
Ah, voicemails. Well, that explains it.
啊语♥音♥留言怪不得
My generation mostly texts.
我这代人喜欢发短♥信♥
I'm only 33, so...
我只有33岁所以
We're in the same generation. I'm 31.
我们是一代人我31岁
31? Mm-hmm.
31岁
But I call you "Mister."
但是我叫你"先生"
And you wear a suit, and...
你穿这身西装还有
That.
这个
Did you just point at my bald spot?
你这是在指我的秃顶吗
No. Look.
没听着
We're putting the apartment on the market.
我们要把公♥寓♥放到寻租市场
We need to get it ready for brokers to show.
要准备妥当交给中介来宣传
We need you out by next friday.
下周五前你要搬出去
Ohhh, next friday's a little tough for me.
下周五我有点不方便
Is there any way we could move it to the sunday after eight years from next friday?
有可能改到八年后的下周日吗
Based on your judge-y eyes,
有鉴于你这鄙视的眼神
I am going to take back my dynamite.
我还是收回我的美金炸♥弹♥吧
Un-boom.
大招收回
Un-boom.
收回
You got a full head... Head of hair.
你头发挺茂盛的
Nope. Okay.
别好吧
Aw. That bad?
噢行不通吗
I'm gonna be homeless.
我要无家可归了
A homeless cop.
无家可归的条子
It's like a made-for-TV movie
就像电影电视里演的一样
that I will not be able to watch
可惜我看不了
because I won't have a television
我要没电视了
because I'll be homeless.
没家哪来电视
Chin up, lil' pup.
振作一点傻小子
First of all, you could watch it on your phone.
首先你可以用手♥机♥看啊
Second, this isn't the only apartment in the city.
其次又不是只有这一套公♥寓♥可以住
We'll find you a new one.
再给你找一套就好了
You're right.
说得对
You're right. This could be good.
你说得对太对了
I mean, maybe we'll find a great place.
兴许我能找到更好的呢
Atta girl. In a cooler neighborhood.
对妞在一个更棒的社区
That's right, girl.
是呀妞
Maybe I'll even have a cute neighbor.
兴许还有个可爱的邻居
Get it, girl.
就是这样妞
You gotta stop calling me girl.
别叫我妞了
Sorry, girl.
抱歉妞
Okay, sirs.
行了长官
I know why you weren't happy with my self-evaluation.
我知道你为什么不喜欢我的自评
You didn't want me to say a flaw that was actually positive,
你不希望我说那些文过饰非的缺点
like how the sergeant always says it's bad that he works out too much.
就像警长老说自己健身太多是很糟糕的事情一样
Whoa. Why the drive-by?
喔干嘛要说到我
Sorry.
抱歉
But that's not right,
不过那是不对的
because you value honesty and humility above all else.
因为您一直标榜要诚实谦逊为先
So what's your biggest flaw?
那么你的最大缺点是
My biggest flaw.
我的最大缺点
I'm too competitive, prone to jealousy,
我太争强好胜善妒他人
"Bit of a killjoy,
有点不解风情
"Follow rules to a fault,
墨守陈规
"Don't know how to relax,
不善言笑
and every now and then, I smoke a cigarette."
而且时不时总抽烟
Is that what you're looking for?
你是要这效果吗
Because I can keep going.
我还能继续的
I am deeply flawed.
我浑身都是缺点
Santiago... Oh, no.
Santiago 噢不好
"Santiago" In "B" Flat.
你降低声调说我名字
You're disappointed.
你失望了
Okay, well,
好吧
I'm going to go to a secret location
我要去秘密地点
and make sure that nobody is smoking there.
去查查有没有人在那里抽烟
I'll be right back.
很快回来
Is this a pre-war?
这是战前建筑吧
Ah, very good eye.
眼力劲不错
And you should know it's also pet-friendly.
告诉你这里可以养宠物的
Really? Do they allow cats?
是吗可以养猫吗
I can't tell if you're being sarcastic.
你这算是挖苦吗
Okay.
好吧
How would you even get a bed in here?
床都放不进怎么睡啊
Oh, Murphy bed.
折叠床嘿
Voila.
瞧
Nope.
别了
This is kinda cool.
这很炫酷哎
High ceilings, so many windows.
层高很高窗户又多
Gina, the toilet is in the middle of the living room.
Gina 厕所在大厅中♥央♥
I think it's sexy.
我觉得很性感哎
So when's this going down?
什么时候能见他遭报应
Well, normally, Lohank hits the locker room when he goes to the gym,
通常 Lohank去健身房♥时就会去开柜子的
so let's see when he plans on working out.
去看看他啥时候会去健身呗
So, Lohank, I was reading an article
Lohank 我读到篇文章
about the benefits of exercise...
讲健身的好处的
You going to the gym today?
你今天去健身房♥吗
Not today. Been spending all my breaks on the phone with my wife, Nancy.
今天算了刚在电♥话♥上和我老婆Nancy吵了好几次
We've been having marital problems.
我们婚姻有问题
Right, 'cause of your hygiene?
是吗因为你不讲卫生吗
What? No, I wish.
啥我倒想
No, about a year ago, she fell down the stairs
一年前她从楼梯上摔下
and broke her back.
伤了她的背
Oh, no.
哦不是吧
Now she's addicted to painkillers.
现在她有止痛药上瘾的问题
We've been fighting a lot. Mm.
我们一直吵啊吵
'Cause I want to help her, you know?
我只是想帮助她懂吗
I guess I just love her so much.
我猜我只是爱她太深