神烦警探

Brooklyn Nine-Nine S01E17

Part 2 Oct. 1, 2020, 12:39 p.m.

people will respect my authority.
这行头会让大众信服
How's that working out for you?
有效果吗
Detectives, when a citizen comes in off the street,
警探们有公民来报案的时候
it is NYPD policy to take a statement.
听他说明案件是纽约警局的规定
This isn't enough of a statement?
这一身还不够说明问题吗
Yes, I wanted to inquire about renting out the Statue of Liberty for a romantic evening.
是的我想咨♥询♥租自♥由♥女神来浪漫一夜要多少钱
Mm-hmm.
嗯哼
Is there a bed in the torch?
火炬里有床吗
No? Okay.
没有好吧
I'll get back to you.
晚点再打给你
Hey there, Charles.
嘿 Charles
I thought maybe we should have a little chat about how crazy you're acting,
我们得谈谈你现在的疯狂行径了
and how you're blowing this beyond repair.
你正在毁灭这段感情
Are you really qualified to give romantic advice?
你有资格提感情建议吗
You're not exactly the king of mature relationships.
你又不是成人感情大♥师♥
Fair enough. But I would argue
有道理但我要说
that I am like a beautiful angel of love,
我就像个美丽的爱情小天使
Who has trouble finding love for himself.
只是暂未找到自己的另一半
Admit that you would see that movie.
承认你会去看那部电影
I would.
我会
Thank you for honesty.
感谢你的诚实
But this is not about me.
但重点不在我
It's about Charles.
在Charles
I've seen this before, buddy, and it is bad.
我见过你这架势相当不妙
Jake, I'm nowhere near full Boyle.
Jake 我离情痴Boyle远着呢
Then prove it. Just push your anniversary dinner one night.
那你证明给我看只要把你的纪念日晚餐推迟一晚
Say, "Vivian, tomorrow doesn't work for me. Can we reschedule?"
说"Vivian 明天我没空能改天吗"
If this will convince you, more than happy.
如果这就能说服你再好不过
No problem. Great.
没问题好极了
Voice mail.
语♥音♥信箱
God, I love how she says the words, "You've reached."
天我超爱她说"你接通了"的时候
Hi, Vivi. It's chucklebunny. Oof.
嗨 Vivi 我是查尔小兔子呃
I'm just calling about dinner tomorrow.
我是想说说明天的晚餐
I can't wait to see you My luscious little breakfast quiche.
我迫不及待想见你了我美味的早餐小蛋饼
I just wanna draw you a bubble bath
我想给你洗个泡泡浴
and spoon-feed you caviar.
然后喂你吃鱼子酱
I think we should open up a joint checking account.
我们应该开个联合账户
I love you-- what am I doing?
我爱你我在干嘛
It's okay. I hung up right after "Chucklebunny."
没事我在查尔小兔子之后就挂了
Help me. I've gone full Boyle.
救救我我已经情痴Boyle了
I need to focus on my reelection campaign.
我得全身贯注在竞选连任上面
Clear my schedule.
清空我的行程
You really care about this little club, huh?
你真的挺在乎这个小俱乐部的是吧
It's not a club. It's an organization that I founded over 25 years ago.
这不是俱乐部是一个我在25年前创建的组织
I'm proud to say we now have 50 members.
自豪地说我们现在有50个成员了
But it wasn't so easy in the beginning.
不过一开始的时候可没那么容易
I'd like to request discretionary funds,
我希望申请自♥由♥资金
to start an organization supporting black gay and lesbian police officers.
来创立一个帮助黑人同性恋警♥察♥的组织
They never actually said no,
他们从没说过不行
so I just went ahead and did it.
所以我就勇往直前了
I've poured my heart and soul into this organization.
我全身心地投入这个组织
And I'm not gonna just give up the presidency.
所以我不会放弃主席的位子
You should make me your campaign manager.
你应该让我当你的竞选经理
I was born for politics.
我简直是为政♥治♥而生
I have great hair and I love lying.
我头发很漂亮还爱撒谎
Find out everything you can about this Jensen.
尽你全力找出有关Jensen的一切
I'll work on my speech.
我继续写演讲稿
How's this for an opening joke?
这个开场笑话如何
You know the toughest part of being a gay black police officer is?
你们知道身为黑人同性恋警官最难的地方是什么吗
The discrimination.
歧视
I believe that's what you call observational humor.
我相信这就是人们所说的真实型幽默
Probably. That's great.
可能是吧太棒了
All right, let's go over our disguises.
好吧来过一遍我们的假身份
I am herbert goffleman from san diego.
我是从圣地亚哥来的Herbert Goffleman
I'm here to stand in the cold outside the Today Show,
我来<今日秀>门外在寒风中站着
holding a sign with a misspelled word on it.
举着一个拼错单词的标语
You know what, you win.
你知道吗你赢了
That neon green fanny pack screams, "Gullible tourist."
那个荧光绿的腰包摆明了你是"容易上当的游客"
It's mine. I brought it from home.
这是我的我从家里带来的
Hey, can I have my phone back, please?
能把手♥机♥还给我吗拜托了
Uh, no, because you will call Vivian,
不行因为你会打给Vivian
and you have the worst case of full Boyle I've ever seen. Huh?
而且这次是我见过的最严重的情痴Boyle 啥
I found this by the way. You wrote "Mr. Charles Ludley" Over a thousand times.
看我找到的你写了一千多遍"Charles Ludley先生"
Why would you take her last name, Boyle?
你为什么要随她姓 Boyle
Look.
听着
For the last two years, I've been directing all my love at rosa.
过去两年我把所有的爱都引向了Rosa
So my emotions just piled up.
所以我的情绪都堆起来了
And now with Vivian,
现在和Vivian在一起
my feelings are springing out of me like a fire hose.
我的感情就像消防龙头一样从我体内喷涌而出
Oh, that is overtly sexual.
这句话也太淫♥荡♥了
Jake, I'm gonna ruin it.
Jake 我会搞砸的
You gotta help me.
你得帮帮我
All right, here's the plan.
好吧计划如下
I'll text Vivian from your phone,
我会用你的手♥机♥发短♥信♥给Vivian
and tell her you want it to be a double date.
然后告诉她你想要来个四人约会
That way, I can come with you and hold your hand.
这样我就能和你一起去牵着你的手
And your hand will be on her butt,
然后你的手就会放到她的屁♥股♥上
because my hand will be on her butt
因为我的手会放在她的屁♥股♥上
You gotta get it together, man.
你冷静点行吗
I told you I need help!
我都说了我需要帮助了
Hey, can I get your file on that Atlantic Avenue drug ring?
嘿我能拿走大西洋街上贩毒团伙的文件吗
Sarge gave me and Scully the case.
警长把那个案子给我和Scully了
What? Oh!
啥嗷
Why did you do that?
你干嘛这样
I-I know I deserved it, but why?
我我知道我罪有应得但为什么
Sarge, you reassigned our drug case?
警长你竟然挪走了我们的毒品案
Diaz and I have been working it for three months.
Diaz和我已经花了整整三个月的功夫
Remember Super Dan?
还记得超级丹吗
The guy you ignored and made fun of?
那个你们嘲笑还无视了的人
He's been perching on rooftops at night, secretly taking photos of drug deals.
他每晚在屋顶上偷♥拍♥毒品交易的照片
He has thousands of images and can I.D. The entire network of dealers.
他有几千张能识别出整个团伙的照片
What? But you refused to take his statement, because he had a cape on.
啥你们拒绝为他立案就因为他披着斗篷
Luckily, hitchcock and Scully didn't mind.
幸运的是 Hitchcock和Scully不介意
I didn't even notice he was wearing a cape.
我根本没注意到他穿着斗篷
You're a cop. You should've noticed that.
你是个警♥察♥ 你应该注意到的
We screwed up. Message received.
我们搞砸了教训领了
Yep, be nicer to virgins.
是啊对处♥男♥友善点
She doesn't speak for me.
她说的与我无关
You're not getting your case back.
案子是不会返给你们的
Okay.
好嘞
Here's what I found out about our competition.
这是我找到的对手的资料
Brian Jense, born 1♥8♥9♥9,
Brian Jense 1♥8♥9♥9年生
served in the navy during world war I.
一战期间在海军服役
A hero at the battle of scimitar hill,
斯萨米塔之战的英雄
Jensen perished in a factory fire in the Netherlands.
Jensen在荷兰的一场工厂火灾中身亡
This may be a different Brian Jensen.
这估计是另一个Brian Jensen
I've never been in this position before.
我从没遇过这种情况
I've always run unopposed.
一直都是无对手竞选
If you wanna compete, you're gonna have to have a little more pizzazz.
如果你想要竞争你得更潇洒点
A couple ideas for ya.
给你几个建议
The obvious place to start would be you, in a silver suit,
首先你可以穿套银色西装
with sunglasses and roller skates--
带着墨镜和穿着溜冰鞋
The candidate of fun.
欢乐竞选人
What's your second idea? Nada.
你有其他主意吗啥都没
Thought I had a slam dunk on the first one.
以为我第一个就能一矢中的
Hi there! We'd like to go to the times square.
你好我们想去时代广场
We're brothers.
我们是兄弟俩
We're all set for the double date tonight.
晚上的四人约会一切就绪
Vivian's bringing her friend bernice.
Vivian会带她朋友Bernice
Bernice?
Bernice